Housepets!

毛毛的小問題 = A Furry Little Problem

Alt Text: 標題也可以叫「小小的毛問題」，怎麼講都行 (or the title could be 'a little furry problem' either way works)

休息吃個三明治 = Sammich Break

先入為主的毛病 = The Problem With Perception Filters

Alt Text: 等下，讓我檢查一下備用的諷刺量表 (hold on, lemme check the backup irony meter...)

頂車機 = Car Lift

Alt Text: 可以把我的起司三明治丟下來嗎，我還沒吃完 (can you toss me my cheese sandwich, I wasn't done)

放我下來 = Put Me Down

Alt Text: 我身上全都是起司三明治了 (i got cheese sandwich all over me)

車聊 = Car Talk

Alt Text: 那隻土豚很快就進入了狀況，因為要是角色接下來20年只會蜷曲成一球上氣不接下氣，那很不有趣 (the aardvark has gotten used to this p quickly because it's less fun when characters just curl into a little ball and hyperventilate for the next twenty years)

回頭看書 = Book Review

Alt Text: 他們兩邊應該是要用嘶吼的方式說話但全都用粗體看起來不好看 (should both probably be shouting at the top of their lungs but perma-bold font doesn't actually look that good)

第十三年結束 = End Of Year Thirteen

Alt Text: -羚羊 (-udgicle)

我已經上演過所有網路漫畫家能做的其他戲碼了，所以現在準備來迎接：休刊宣告 = I’ve Done Every Other Cliche As A Webcartoonist, Now Get Ready For: The Hiatus Notice

Alt Text: 別再找隱藏文字了！ (stop looking for hovertext!)

ARC 137. 唯恐天下不亂 啟示錄 = HECKRAISER REVELATIONS
譯者：紅狐

你心目中的毀滅者 = The Form Of Your Destructor

Alt Text: 而與此同時，還有人在出版諾斯特拉達穆斯的書 *捏緊小拳頭*(meanwhile nostradamus somehow keeps getting published *shakes tiny fist*)
諾斯特拉達穆斯所寫下的《百詩集》大概就是等同推背圖之類的書籍，後世人經過各種「研究」後發現其準確地「預言」了未來的事件

越來越火熱了 = Getting Hot In Here

Alt Text: 冷氣，到處都是冷氣卻沒有地方散熱的(AC AC everywhere but not a heat to sink)

逃生程序 = Escape Sequence

Alt Text: 呃…我是毒蛇，我來「毒」抹你的窗？(um... I'm the viper, and I've come to vipe your vindows?)

天梯頂端 = The Top Of The Ladder

Alt Text: 是的，就連闇布里歐也本能地就發覺了 (yes even negabreel knows instinctually)

應用在哲學難題 = Applied Philosophical Quandaries

終有一生 = Memento Mortalis

Alt Text: 「真要說的話我身為凡間生物的經驗可是比你們還多--好吧這樣聽起來好像更爛了」("I technically have more experience being mortal that you do--okay wow that sounds even worse")

無知者們 = The Know Nothing Party

Alt Text: 這些動物到底是不是和人類有作息這個問題又不是我的錯。好吧，也許是我—作者—的錯，但我現在是在幫德蕾格說話，不去計較她貼第四面牆貼這麼近的話，所以到頭來還是作者—他個人—的看法。呃…忍術煙霧彈 *煙霧散去了我還是在同一個地方，只不過現在吃著義大利香腸三明治*(look it's not MY fault that it's technically ambiguous how often the animals follow human behavior patterns or not. Okay, maybe it is MY fault, the author, but in this case I'm speaking for Draig, except that she shouldn't be leaning on the fourth wall so hard, so it's still an author editorial. On himself. Um... NINJA SMOKEBOMB *the smoke clears and I'm in the exact same position except eating a pepperoni sandwich*)

神與眾生 = Gods And Generalities

Alt Text: 別怪我，是你們凡間生物先想出這些奇怪情節的 (don't blame me, you mortals came up with the idea that it's weird to begin with)

童言童語 = From The Yawning Mouth Of Babes

Alt Text: 或許我該開始令人毛骨悚然地對著壞掉的音樂盒唱童謠就好 (maybe I'll just start creepily singing nursery rhymes to a broken musicbox)

故事的啟示是 = The Moral Of The Story Is

Alt Text: 九尾有無論什麼形狀的格子都可以出現在我需要他的任何位置的特殊能力 (kitsune has the special power to appear in whatever position I need him to be in to fit the shape of the panel)

神一定很懶 = The Gods Must Be Lazy

Alt Text: 你不能因為我講實話懲罰我！
你已經當狐狸好幾年了，再不智也該有個限度吧
(You can’t penalize me for honesty!
You’ve been a fox for several years already, you should know better than to be unclever)

人生苦於噁心，當殺之 = Life Is Gross Kill It All

Alt Text: 你以為他們說「所有孔洞」是誇大其詞，結果他們說的不但是對的，還沒講清楚到底有多少孔洞 (you think they're exaggerating when they say "every orifice" but it turns out they were not only telling the truth, they glossed over the number of orifices there are)

無聊？讓我看看我的PDA = Bored? Lemme Check My PDA

Alt Text: 接吻到目前為止在這個故事也算數 : 3 （你懂的） (smooching count in this story thus far: 3 (that you know of))

「是啦，不是」或者「不是啦，是」 = As In “Yeah, No” Or “No, Yeah”?

Alt Text: 呣嗯 (mmph)

看守、水、口渴、病人 = Guard. Water. Thirsty. Sick Man.

Alt Text: *用報紙戳巨大惡魔的鼻子* (*baps giant demon nose with newspaper*)

掀了頂 = Raise The Roof

Alt Text: 露薏絲那是我們在做的事 (lois that's OUR thing)

給我過來 = Get Over Here

Alt Text: 你逃不出我的魔掌的 (you can't escape the long arm of the...chaos)

如果每天都是聖誕節 = If Every Day Was Like Christmas

Alt Text: 我個人每天參與1.56個超聖誕節。那些家人太爛的人都會得到代理家庭成員，所以我至今算是很多人的媽媽了。是的，很溫馨，你可以讚嘆了 (Personally, I attend 1.56 megachristmases every day. Everyone whose family sucks is provided surrogate family members, and I'm basically a lot of peoples' mom at this point. Yes it's adorable, you may aww.)

非禮勿梯 = It’s Impolite To Stair

Alt Text: 塔羅妳又是怎麼在闖蕩神廟的時候還能跟上腳步的—喔，對，超能力。妳現在沒有了，因為妳只是隻普通的狗 (tarot how did you even manage to keep up down the entire temple--oh right superpowers. Which you don't have. Cause you're a regular dog.)

舔舔碰碰 = Licky Boom Boom Down

Alt Text: 我還是想要去廁所 (I still need to go to the bathroom)

捕熊陷阱 = Bear Trap

Alt Text: 噢，我的毒舌器官 (OW, MY IRONY GLAND)

漫步大草原 = Wandering The Steppe

Alt Text: 也許你該像直昇機一樣旋轉你的翅膀… (maybe if you spun them around like a helicopter...)

大大小孩 = Baby Driver

Alt Text: 我都不知道現在還有在製造嬰兒帽這種東西喔 (I didn't even know they MADE baby bonnets anymore)

保險槓貼 = Bumper Sticker

Alt Text: 「親愛的，有隻貓掛在後車門上」
「我告訴過妳不要在我開車的時候跟我講話，瑪莎，妳手離收音機遠一點我不喜歡開音樂」
("dear, there's a cat hanging onto our rear door"
"I TOLD YOU NEVER TO TALK TO ME WHILE I'M DRIVING MARTHA, GET YOUR HAND AWAY FROM THE RADIO I LIKE IT OFF")

又一個貼牆上 = Another Blip In The Wall

Alt Text: 刮盤聲 (wub wub)

山貓季 = Lynx Season

Alt Text: 或者說選擇上、假設上、理論上 (or, alternatively, hypothetically, theoretically,)

垃圾堆撿來的情人卡 = Trashy Valentines Cards 2022-02-14

科瑞：愛情奇臭無比（是的，我們臭味相投）
法斯：吟遊詩人有云：「何謂愛情？寶貝別傷害我，別又傷害我」你已經被浪漫沙士鄙牙了，我接受以卿卿我我作為報答
卡車：別擔心，我讓你免受這些噁心內餡的巧克力的傷害了（全部喔）
阿墨：我可以為你創造信仰
Alt Text: 那些是羅素·斯托弗（美國巧克力品牌），所以你沒有損失什麼啦 (it was russell stover, so you're not missing anything)
那首歌當然不是莎士比亞，而是海德威在1993年的熱門單曲“What Is Love”

黑暗王子 = Prince Of Darkness

Alt Text: 噫 (eep)

千萬別抬頭 = Don’t Look Up

Alt Text: 風豪大 (it fuzzin WIMDY)

英雄降臨 = Along Came Jones

Alt Text: 再來一次 (DO IT AGAIN)

走了走了沒什麼好看的 = Move Along Nothing To See

Alt Text: 真不敢相信我居然得為了這種事停下工作 (I can't believe I have to get out of work for this)