Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer.

dr_eirik · Post by **dr_eirik** » Sun Oct 11, 2020 9:06 am

Stuffed animals always have those. Now hold still while I scan you.

What should I serve for Halloween Feast?

trekkie · Post by **trekkie** » Mon Oct 12, 2020 5:09 pm

Edward Cullen

Ever been bit by a dead bee?

dr_eirik · Post by **dr_eirik** » Sun Oct 18, 2020 12:40 am

Of course not, I bit him first.

Erecting this building is taking way more than four hours, should I call a doctor?

trekkie · Post by **trekkie** » Sun Oct 18, 2020 3:58 am

Only if you’re in Spooner, Wisconsin and your name is Eugene.

Have you never been mellow?

dr_eirik · Post by **dr_eirik** » Fri Oct 23, 2020 12:17 am

I've only been yellow.

What would it take to put you in the driver's seat of this Pontiac Aztec?

trekkie · Post by **trekkie** » Fri Oct 23, 2020 7:15 am

A bag of Skittles and a water bed.

Is there a script doctor in the house?

Nathan Kerbonaut · Post by **Nathan Kerbonaut** » Sat Nov 28, 2020 5:53 pm

I studied wordsmithing in college, will that do?

Would you like your coffee Cartesian or Polar?

Harry Johnathan · Post by **Harry Johnathan** » Sun Nov 29, 2020 6:41 am

Nathan Kerbonaut wrote: ↑Sat Nov 28, 2020 5:53 pm I studied wordsmithing in college, will that do?

Would you like your coffee Cartesian or Polar?

No, I want it southwestern.

Does anyone know where the wrench went?

trekkie · Post by **trekkie** » Sun Nov 29, 2020 8:43 am

It bought a goat farm and moved to Riverside, California.

Does anyone have a beef roast in the oven?

Nathan Kerbonaut · Post by **Nathan Kerbonaut** » Fri Dec 04, 2020 3:37 pm

Yes - and she doesn't like being called that.

How many years in a day?

trekkie · Post by **trekkie** » Fri Dec 04, 2020 7:42 pm

Dorothy Parker.

Any idea where California went?

dr_eirik · Post by **dr_eirik** » Fri Dec 04, 2020 9:42 pm

It's out to lunch.

Who is the Jester?

Nathan Kerbonaut · Post by **Nathan Kerbonaut** » Sat Dec 05, 2020 4:35 pm

My neighbor Gary, the clown college dropout.

Do you have an alligator license?

dr_eirik · Post by **dr_eirik** » Sat Dec 05, 2020 7:34 pm

Don't need one, I don't drive a Gator

Can you decorate my house with the content of this box?

trekkie · Post by **trekkie** » Sat Dec 05, 2020 11:12 pm

Only if it’s a box from a Menard’s outside Ames, Iowa.

Do you have any fruit to declare?

Nathan Kerbonaut · Post by **Nathan Kerbonaut** » Mon Dec 07, 2020 4:59 pm

The mangoes seek asylum.

Have you seen the upside-down forest?

dr_eirik · Post by **dr_eirik** » Mon Dec 07, 2020 5:45 pm

Sure, it's on the shore of the fractal lake.

Can you show me on this model of the Space Shuttle where the economy class seats are?

trekkie · Post by **trekkie** » Wed Dec 09, 2020 5:32 pm

Let me check my purse.

Does the fun really never stop when you’re clean and tidy?

Nathan Kerbonaut · Post by **Nathan Kerbonaut** » Wed Dec 09, 2020 7:21 pm

It's true, and if you're lucky the shampoo bottles will do their dance routine.

What's the measurement of these jeans in gigabits?

dr_eirik · Post by **dr_eirik** » Wed Dec 09, 2020 7:37 pm

14 hogahead per kight year.

WHAT'S HAPPENING?!

trekkie · Post by **trekkie** » Wed Dec 09, 2020 8:05 pm

The 2021 puddings are out.

Does anyone know where I can get an alternator for a Buick Skylark?

dr_eirik · Post by **dr_eirik** » Wed Dec 09, 2020 8:30 pm

Bob's Auto Parts in Gary, Indiana circa 1993

Are you the keymaster?

Vertigo Fox · Post by **Vertigo Fox** » Wed Dec 16, 2020 4:47 pm

No, I think I'm his pet mongoose.

But then how can I be telling you this?

dr_eirik · Post by **dr_eirik** » Fri Dec 18, 2020 12:38 am

By using your flock of trained hummingbirds.

Which endangered animal should I serve for Christmas dinner?

trekkie · Post by **trekkie** » Fri Dec 18, 2020 9:40 am

Bella Swan

Should we alert the nearby town of that yeti ?

dr_eirik · Post by **dr_eirik** » Sun Dec 20, 2020 5:18 pm

Naw, lets wait until after the detonation.

What does this button do:

trekkie · Post by **trekkie** » Sun Dec 20, 2020 5:32 pm

It makes Big Jake's famous no bean chili. Or it launches a missile at Togo. One of the two.

Do you know anything by Donna Summer?

dr_eirik · Post by **dr_eirik** » Tue Dec 22, 2020 12:53 pm

No, but I know her cousin Joanna Fall.

What would it take to put you in the drivers seat of this 1985 Yugo?

Harry Johnathan · Post by **Harry Johnathan** » Tue Dec 22, 2020 1:23 pm

Nothing, because I'm not Yugoslavian.

What DID happen to Mike Warnersauce?

trekkie · Post by **trekkie** » Tue Dec 22, 2020 4:09 pm

He was traded to the Cubs for two minor leaguers and a player to be named later.

Ever seen a chartreuse pachyderm?

dr_eirik · Post by **dr_eirik** » Tue Dec 22, 2020 4:15 pm

No, but I have seen a puce hippopotamous.

What's the number for 9-1-1?

Harry Johnathan · Post by **Harry Johnathan** » Wed Dec 23, 2020 6:24 am

7-7-7

What's wrong with Bunnie Hart?

Vertigo Fox · Post by **Vertigo Fox** » Fri Dec 25, 2020 8:00 pm

Nothing at all! People are supposed to look inside-out like that!
...at least when I'm around

On a scale of two to twenty-three, where does it hurt?

dr_eirik · Post by **dr_eirik** » Fri Dec 25, 2020 8:20 pm

Right in my fifth.

Who wants leftover Emu?

trekkie · Post by **trekkie** » Tue Dec 29, 2020 12:33 pm

Rob from accounting ordered a plate.

Should we fry or bake that aardvark ?

dr_eirik · Post by **dr_eirik** » Tue Dec 29, 2020 12:35 pm

'The aardvark just got back from the dispensary. He's already baked.

Where can I get a gallon of blinker fluid?

trekkie · Post by **trekkie** » Tue Dec 29, 2020 6:49 pm

Al's Auto Fluid Barn Aisle 9 Section C, on your right if you're facing the back of the store.

Who do you think will win the Future Ant Farmer. Of America scholarship?

Vertigo Fox · Post by **Vertigo Fox** » Wed Dec 30, 2020 3:10 pm

Probably the aardvark if we're being real.

Window-smashing party anyone?

trekkie · Post by **trekkie** » Wed Dec 30, 2020 5:00 pm

Sure, I’ll bring the hot onion dip.

Did anyone order a leopard-print seat cover for a 1966 Rambler American?

dr_eirik · Post by **dr_eirik** » Wed Dec 30, 2020 11:14 pm

Perfect! Just in time to pick up the Manson family!

Whats the fastest animal on Mars?