Housepets!

Posted: **Wed Apr 24, 2019 7:00 am**

I pull you in with me.

Posted: **Sat Apr 27, 2019 9:03 am**

I slap you with a fly flap.

Posted: **Sat Apr 27, 2019 9:57 am**

▲!A, X, R, ▲R, ▲B

Posted: **Sun May 05, 2019 1:22 pm**

Buster wrote:▲!A, X, R, ▲R, ▲B

What?
You know that you have to provide an English translation when you're writing in another language...

*slaps you with a rolled up newspaper*

Posted: **Sun May 05, 2019 8:17 pm**

Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A!

Posted: **Mon May 06, 2019 7:20 am**

Render wrote:
Buster wrote:▲!A, X, R, ▲R, ▲B
What?
You know that you have to provide an English translation when you're writing in another language...

it's not another language, they're button prompts. have you never played a fighting game?

now if you'll excuse me...
*uses LunarFox for surgeon simulator practice*

Posted: **Mon May 06, 2019 11:29 am**

*grabs scalpel to fend off Buster*

Posted: **Mon May 06, 2019 12:49 pm**

*starts shining with prismatic light and utters a sinister laugh before raising her arm canon and firing off the largest blast the phazon beam can produce.*

Posted: **Mon May 06, 2019 8:35 pm**

Good thing I always carry a mirror with me, so I use that to bounce the beam back at you.

Posted: **Tue May 07, 2019 9:49 pm**

Phazon isn't an electromagnetic wavelength, it's a molecular compound. it doesn't reflect that way.
enjoy having half-vaporised mutated organs.

Posted: **Tue May 21, 2019 9:12 am**

But if I die, you're coming along!

I throw a stack of shiny shuriken.

Posted: **Tue May 21, 2019 10:32 am**

Your shiny shuriken succeed in mesmerizing my team of trained combat seals (I couldn't find any narwhales) who proceed to flop all over you, smothering you in cuteness....

Posted: **Tue May 21, 2019 12:58 pm**

*uses LunarFox as a club to pummel you into submission*

Posted: **Tue May 21, 2019 4:12 pm**

I use my claws to scratch you for using me as a club.

Posted: **Mon Jun 10, 2019 8:43 pm**

I use my boy scout nail clippers to manicure your claws and thereby making it impossible for you to turn the pages of your favorite glossy graphic novels.

Posted: **Mon Jun 10, 2019 8:46 pm**

I USE CHEESE TO SLAP YOU UPSIDE THE HEAD

Posted: **Mon Jun 10, 2019 10:00 pm**

HOWITZER IMPACT!

Posted: **Wed Jun 12, 2019 7:32 am**

Sorry, Cap, but I've got Mr. Rogers' shield, that I use to deflect your howitzer shot right back at you.

Posted: **Wed Jun 12, 2019 7:06 pm**

Dodging your artillery round, I deftly respond by flattening you with a twenty pound sack of yellow onions.

Posted: **Sun Jun 16, 2019 4:28 pm**

*whips her tail around launching a dozen spines at you.*

Posted: **Wed Jun 19, 2019 3:12 pm**

Dancing deftly away from your attempted spinal tap, I release the charge of 10,000 hedgehogs, extra-prickly and excruciatingly cute!

Posted: **Wed Jun 19, 2019 5:23 pm**

*firebreath*
*enjoys a large and delicious lunch of roasted rodent, courtesy of tuam*
*has apparently also nommed one of TUAM's arms*

Posted: **Fri Jun 21, 2019 12:02 pm**

Which I then use to slap you.

Posted: **Fri Jun 28, 2019 2:37 pm**

And, in gratitude for recovering my arm, I use it to direct lightening bolts into your bedroom slippers.

Posted: **Fri Jun 28, 2019 8:46 pm**

i use sarcastic mockery to point out that you probably meant lightning not lightening and that you've effectively given him hover shoes.

Posted: **Fri Jun 28, 2019 11:57 pm**

I do this.

https://youtu.be/aSHcFlNOElE?t=11

Posted: **Sat Jun 29, 2019 4:35 pm**

I cast thrashing water, *rolls 2d20* 20 twice which means 22 plus 2. 44 damage!

Posted: **Sat Jun 29, 2019 8:35 pm**

*casts intensified maximized empowered fireball*
135 DMG!

Posted: **Wed Jul 03, 2019 8:46 am**

Role of the Wanderer, Rule of Rending.... Engrave mine name unto the and come forth!

Boundless Tail!

241 Damage

Posted: **Wed Jul 03, 2019 8:52 am**

"bOUNDLESS TAIL"? Clearly, you're a serpent - Mongoose brigade to the attack!

Posted: **Wed Jul 03, 2019 9:55 am**

*Holds up a summon materia*

Ultimate End

9999 DMG
9917 DMG
9999 DMG
9999 DMG
9935 DMG
9999 DMG
9299 DMG
9979 DMG
9999 DMG
9996 DMG
9939 DMG
9999 DMG
9998 DMG

Posted: **Thu Jul 04, 2019 10:25 pm**

I throw a copy of Danganronpa at you.

What? I thought it was good at ending Ultimates.

Posted: **Fri Jul 05, 2019 10:48 pm**

i feed your pie to 5.0.5

Posted: **Sat Jul 06, 2019 9:40 am**

I defeat Jailer of Love, thus summoning Absolute Virtue to fight you. Enjoy fighting an enemy that can use all your ultimate abilities whenever it wants, can completely heal itself whenever it wants, and enjoy having the devs either nerf whatever strategy you use to best it or just outright ban you!
Seriously though, the history behind this guy is kinda nuts and fascinating, and I’d recommend looking into it.

Posted: **Sat Jul 06, 2019 7:14 pm**

I hit you with severe allergies.

Posted: **Sat Jul 06, 2019 8:17 pm**

/Debug
/KillEntity.ALL ()

Posted: **Sat Jul 06, 2019 9:01 pm**

I hit you with an Uno reverse card.

Posted: **Sat Jul 06, 2019 9:10 pm**

.esrever ni rehtegot kcab uoy tup I

Posted: **Sun Jul 07, 2019 2:20 am**

I let a horse backup onto you.

Posted: **Sun Jul 07, 2019 11:06 pm**

But that's putting the cart before the horse, and the cart, now unhitched, squishes you.

Housepets!

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