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]Elliot. Somewhere in space, this may all be happening right now... 20th Century Karishad and Rock Milton, the ferret who brought you 'Canine Cibble' & 'The Pridelands Cycle' brings you 'Star Pets!'.
It's an epic of heroes, a sprawling space saga of rebellion and romance.
Star Pets!
A film about a boy, a girl and a universe, light-years ahead of it's time.
Star Pets! Coming soon to your galaxy.
Last edited by Harry Johnathan on Tue Jan 26, 2021 12:20 pm, edited 11 times in total.
Sarah was afraid, so she lied and said, “I did not laugh.” But [The LORD] said, “Yes, you did laugh.” - Genesis 18:15 (NIV).
EPISODE IV (Yes, we're going in Narnia order): A NEW-ISH HOPE
It is a period of civil war in the galaxy. A brave alliance of rebels have challenged the tyranny and oppression of the wicked Galatic Empire.
Striking from a hidden fortress, rebel starships have won their first victory in a battle with the powerful Imperial Starfleet, stealing the plans to the mega-weapon THE DEATH BALL, and giving it to their leader PRINCESS GRAPE. The EMPIRE, headed by the mysterious EMPEROR BINO and his right-hand man DARTH JATA, fear that another defeat could bring a thousand more solar systems into the rebellion, and Imperial control over the galaxy would be lost forever. To crush the rebellion, the EMPIRE is planning to kidnap THE PRINCESS and use the DEATH BALL to destroy her home planet!
A large, (honestly far too large to be practical) starship moves along through space. A small pod, carrying within the dead body of a Rebel fighter, clutching in his hands the plans to the Death Ball, is found inside by Alderann soilders. A soilder brings the blueprint to Princess Grape, whose eyelashes are being combed by her droids BR13-LL and KN9N.
"Ow!", cried Grape when KN9N pulled a bit too hard on her eyelash.
"Sorry!", replied BR13-LL.
Grape then whispered something into KN9N's ear. KN9N nodded and began creating a message inside his mainframe.
"Princess!", cried one of her soilders. "There appears to be a Imperial ship heading our way!"
"It's already here!", cried a voice outside the door.
Suddenly, Darth Jata, flanked by his Imperial goons and his commander Grand Moff Jack, entered the room, pushing aside Grape's guards.
"Princess Grape." Jata was pointing a finger at her. One of her soilders run up to Jata armed with a spear; Jata grabbed him by the throat and threw him against the wall.
Grape stuffed the plans into her coat pocket, when KN9N grabbed them from her. BR13-LL looked at KN9N somewhat suspiciously, but nodded as he understood.
"You'll never have the plans! Torture me if you want but you'll never have them."
"So be it." Jata then called for a TRNK-T droid, brandishing a needle filled with truth serum, and closed the door, his guards pushing KN9N and BR13-LL outside.
"Now what do we do?"
KN9N dragged a somewhat surprised BR13-LL towards an escape pod, and together they set course back for Alderann. While flying, however, their ship was hit by a stray bullet, causing them to crash-land on...
Peanut Sandwich was helping out his Uncle Earl on the farm.
"Ow! Be careful where you're pointing that thing!", cried Earl when Peanut poked him with his hoe.
"Sorry!", replied Peanut, blushing.
Peanut heard a loud WOOOO coming from the countryside.
"It's that crazy old coot Ben again.", said Earl as he began digging.
"Don't call him crazy. He's my friend!"
"Sure he is, Peanut. Sure he is." Earl stubbed his toe on a rock. "Ooof! Dang Tatooine soil!"
Just then, Peanut's Aunt Jill ran in, brandishing a report from the Empire.
"If we don't start raising up profits, the Empire will take away our farm."
Uncle Earl went away for a bit, depressed, to the local tavern.
"I hope he's alright.", said Peanut. He looked out as the sun began to set.
"He'll be fine, love. Your uncle's just worried about you."
Peanut looked up as a starship flew across the sky.
"Man, it must be exciting to fly around space, going on adventures."
"Don't get your hopes up.", Aunt Jill warned. "After all, you're just a farmer here on Tatooine, easily the poorest planet in the Galaxy! Now get some rest."
"Aw, Aunt Jill!", said Peanut as she kissed his forehead, hugging him.
"Don't aw me, mister. Now come inside. It's getting dark."
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
KN9N and BR13-LL's ship crash-landed on Tatooine. It was early morning the next day.
"Well this is just great! Our ship is in disrepair and we've landed God-knows-where!"
KN9N stuck out his tongue at BR13-LL.
"Don't sass me, mister!", cried BR13-LL when they heard chanting around them.
"What th-?", cried BR13-LL as Jawa traders surrounded them, hitting them with sticks and binding them in ropes.
"You can't do this to me!", cried BR13-LL, but it was too late as they were carried off by the Jawa to the local market...
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"What the fudge Earl!"
"What?", said Earl as he presented the two droids, BR13-LL and KN9N, he had bought at the local droid market.
"You've spent nearly all of our money on these blasted machines! How are we going to pay back our debt to the Emperor now!"
"I'll think of something, miss!", cried Earl. The two continued arguing as Peanut, excited by the new droids, took them to his room to 'study' them.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"Don't touch that, little boy!", cried BR13-LL as Peanut took a screwdriver to his circuits.
"Shut up.", replied a frustrated Peanut. "Gee, did your old owner ever fix you up? Your chips are just filled with rust and decay!"
"I'm my own free agent, thank you.", replied BR13-LL.
"Sure you are."
KN9N was digging around Peanut's room, admiring his toys and games, when he fell from his desk, screaming and unable to get up.
"I'm coming, KN9N!", cried Peanut when he noticed a bluish hollogram being projected from one of KN9N's eyes. It was of Princess Grape.
"Help! O-obi-Wa- Ann Kennob-ii... You're my only h-hope..." The message ended.
"Kenobi? That sounds like that old man Ben!"
He grabbed the droids. "Watch it!", cried BR13-LL.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jill was at the door as Peanut dressed in his coat, taking KN9N and BR13-LL with him. Earl was in his chair, reading on his crystal tablet ads for "Part Time Jobs".
"And just where are you going, young man?"
"I've gotta see Ben!"
"Don't leave without giving me a goodbye kiss!"
"Aw, Auntie!"
He struggled away from her hug and ran...
The sound of what seemed to be an Imperial TIE fighter zoomed over the skyline.
"Do you hear something, Earl? Earl?"
Earl was asleep, drooling. Jill rolled her eyes and went back to making supper.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Peanut and his droid companions BR13-LL and KN9N were travelling along the sand dunes of Tatooine, searching for the old hermit Ben Kenobi, when suddenly...
"ARRREAAGGHHH!", cried one of the ferals, a fearsome tribe of racoon bandits that hid in the desert and attacked all those unfortunate enough to travel along the dunes. Peanut fell in surprise and hit his wrist in a rock, straining it and covering the sand in blood. Just as this particular feral raised up his staff, ready to bash in poor Peanut's brains, a strange sound came out from the wilderness...
WOOOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOOOOO....
The confused feral grunted, and moved away, trying to discover the source of the sound, and was met by a WHACK from the broom brandished by Ben Kenobi, an elderly blue Austrailan Shepherd.
"Ben!", cried Peanut as he got up, but his wrist began to hurt. "Ow! It stings!"
"Come inside, my boy. I'll get you some bandages."
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
As Ben was patching up Peanut's wrist, KN9N was exploring Ben's makeshift home inside of a cave, only to be restrained by BR13-LL.
"Mph! Hpmph!"
"Don't go peeking about random people's belongings, KN!"
Ben chuckled. He handed Peanut an orange soda from a case. "Now, what brings you here, Peanut Butter?"
Peanut blushed. He hated his nickname. Peanut began to whisper. "Do you know someone named Obi Wan Kenobi?"
"Of course I do. I am Obi Wan Kenobi."
Peanut spat out his soda. He began to yell:; "And you never told me?"
"You never asked." Ben booped Peanut's nose. "Yes, I'm Obi Wan Kenobi. Part of the sacred order of the Jedi Knights, before the Empire took control of the galaxy."
"Jedi Knights?"
"An old religious organization, like the Catholic Church on Earth, sworn to protect the galaxy from evil. We brandished these weapons known as "lightsabers", and relied on a powerful spirit known as The Force to guide us. However, the force had a bad side, we called it the dark side. A few of our members formed a cult based around this dark side, known as the Sith. They went mad with power, and there was a great war, known in history books as The Clone Wars. Many of us didn't survive, and the Empire was established when the Chancellor of the Jedi Republic at the time, Bino Palpatine, took the chance to take power. He blamed the chaos of the Clone Wars on us." Ben took a sip of his drink. "We were persecuted against, and went into hiding. And that's how I ended up here."
Suddenly, KN9N began playing the message from Grape again after falling off Ben's woobly dinner table, drunk on Orange Soda.
"Obi Wan- you're my only hope..."
Ben paused. He looked at Peanut.
"Peanut, my boy. Would you like to go on an adventure?"
Last edited by Harry Johnathan on Wed Jan 13, 2021 5:52 am, edited 5 times in total.
Sarah was afraid, so she lied and said, “I did not laugh.” But [The LORD] said, “Yes, you did laugh.” - Genesis 18:15 (NIV).
The two of them, Peanut Skywalker and Obi-Wan "Ben" Kenobi, walked hand in hand towards Peanut's Aunt and Uncle's farm. What they found when they got there, however, made Peanut gasp.
The entire farm and the surrounding areas was reduced to a smoldering pile of ashes, saved the charred skeletons of his Aunt Jill and Uncle Earl. Peanut ran up to them, and cradled their bony corpses in his arms; he began to sob. Ben placed a comforting hand on a distressed Peanut's shoulders.
Nay, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil, for thou art with me..
Suddenly, an Imperial starship above in the sky could be heard dropping a bomb upon them! Ben began screaming;
"Peanut, run!"
"No!"
Ben grabbed Peanut. "Run!"
The two ran far, far away as the bomb finished off what remained of the old farm, leaving in it's wake a massive crater...
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Peanut was silent as he rode with Ben and the droids to the nearby town of Mos Elias.
"Where are we going?", Peanut asked in a quiet voice.
"To the local tavern. I heard from a hawk named Skip that there is a man, a certain gambler named Maxwell Solo, willing to provide a ride to the Alderann system for a cheap price. But be wary of the men in that tavern; you won't find a more wretched hive of filth and corruption in all the galaxy."
They stopped at the middle of the road as two Imperial stormtroopers named Poncho and Lois stopped them for questioning.
"Who is with you?"
"Just my grandson and our two droids. We've been planning a trip to the city for his doctor's appointment"
"Where did you get your droids?", asked Lois as Poncho sniffed around their small ship.
"I bought them at the fair. Why?"
"Nothing suspicious here.", called out Poncho. Lois let the group go on to the tavern.
"Stay safe, old man!"
"Oh, I will!" He mumbled under his breath: "-but very soon you won't..."
The two reached the tavern just in time to witness Boris, a former famous prize fighter who had a scandal invovling an affair with a certain duchess and was disgraced, and another black dog, duking it out, throwing chairs all over the place. A band was playing some sort of song. It sounded like jazz, but it very clearly wasn't.
A dog named Karo grabbed Ben's arm. "What's an old coot like you doing in-"
"Silence, mutt!", cried Ben as he grabbed out his lightsaber, and pointed it at Karo's face.
"Gulp!", said Karo, who backed off.
"We'll take a table over there.", Ben said to the tavern owner, pointing near Han Solo.
"Are you sure? Mr. Solo's a bit of a scoundrel..."
"What am I paying you for?"
The group sat next to Solo.
Solo, a black tuxedo cat with a chunk missing from his ear and a big toothy grin on his mug, pulled out his fazer and laid it on the table. A small chihuahua, Sten, walked into the bar and approached Solo.
"Mr. Solo? The boss sai-"
Solo shot Sten, to the shock of several people.
Solo then turned back to the main group. "Okay, so here's the deal; I give you a ride to Alderann, you give me 50 grand. Got it?"
"Got it.", replied Peanut. Ben shooshed him.
"Let's go boys!", said Solo as he led the group to the back of the tavern.
"It's gonna be a weird day.", said the tavern owner.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The group looked in awe at Solo's ship, The Millennium Falcon.
"It's beautiful.", said Peanut.
"Ah, it's not even mine.", said Solo. "Borrowed it offa some nut named Jabba. No doubt Sten was sent by him to scare me into giving it back."
"How fast can it go?"
Solo's eyes lit up; he began showing a toothy chesire grin.
"Oh, this baby can reach speeds of at least five thousand miles lightspeed! She's the fastest hunk o' junk in the galaxy and you can quote me on that!"
"MAAA!"
"Who's that?", cried Peanut upon seeing Solo's co-pilot, a brown she bear.
"It's Bruno, my co-pilot. You have a problem with her or something?"
"No, but..."
"Just get in the ship!"
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"Pray to Yah that this thing speeds off!"
The Millennium Falcon zoomed off into hyperspace, amazing onlookers down in the city and impressing the effects judges at the Academy Awars enough to boost the self esteem of our effects people, who were contemplating becoming janitors at the hall of the Academy Awards.
Meanwhile, on the Death Ball...
"Where are you taking me?!", cried Princess Grape.
Jata laughed. "To the cockpit."
Grape gulped.
Inside the cockpit, Grand Moff Jack approached Grape mock-chivarously, before slapping her across the face.
"Ow!"
"Grape, we're so glad you're here to see the destruction of Alderann." He pointed to a group of Imperial soilders, who began firing up the Death Ball's heat ray. "The Death Ball, my dear, has the most advanced heat ray in the entire galaxy. It could potentially destroy three planets and a large spacecraft at once. It's not finished yet, mind you, but it's still potent enough to reduce your dear homeworld to smoldering ashes. Now, Princess Grape, if you don't want millions of innocent men, women and children to die in a firey heap, I suggest that you hand over the plans for my machine back to me."
Grape thought hard for a few second, sweating, before grabbing the plans out of her pocket and handing them to him.
"Thank you, Princess."
"Screw you!"
"Always so considerate...", Jack mumbled.
Jack looked the papers over. "THIS ISN'T WHAT I WANTED!", He revealed the papers to be nothing but blank sheets of toilet paper, to the amusement of Imperial guards.
"SILENCE!", Jack screamed at the guards, who shut up instantly in fear, peeing their pants. Jack left the room. "Destroy Alderann! Jata, make sure she watches!"
Jata grabbed Grape and forced her to witness through the Death Ball's window as a beam of red light zoomed towards the poor planet of Alderann, obliterating in seconds. A single tear was upon her cheek.
Last edited by Harry Johnathan on Sat Jan 23, 2021 1:43 pm, edited 3 times in total.
Sarah was afraid, so she lied and said, “I did not laugh.” But [The LORD] said, “Yes, you did laugh.” - Genesis 18:15 (NIV).
Great job so far. You’re nailing both the Star Wars and HP!, characters. I particularly like Max as Han Solo and Peanut as Luke, Grape will be a great tail-kicking Leia as well. Keep up the good work!
“Freedom has cost too much blood and agony to be relinquished at the cheap price of rhetoric.” - Thomas Sowell
“The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron.” Phyllis Diller
"That's impossible! There's no way we could do that! The Death Ball is armed with like, nukes and stuff!"
Ben chuckled. He took something out of his bag. "Peanut, your father, before he died, entrusted me to give you.... this."
Ben handed Peanut a green lightsaber. Peanut turned it on; it still worked. He swung it around a few times, laughing... until we accidently nicked BR13-LL's arm.
"Hey! Watch it."
"Sorry!", cried Peanut, who promptly lost his balance and fell into a pile of cardboard boxes. Ben saw KN9N giggling, and gave him the death glare. KN9N shut up.
Solo chuckled. "Those Jedis. They're so crazy. Right, Bruno? Bruno?"
Bruno was asleep. Her slobber covered poor Solo's arm.
"Ew!"
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jata made his way towards the hall of the Death Ball, meeting with the other Sith rulers, including;
ADMIRAL GRISWOLD
GRAND MOFF JACK MILTON
and PRINCE LESTER.
Jata turned on the hologram machine which sat atop the table of the room, and they were greeted with a message sent by Emperor Bino.
"I trust that you have captured the princess, Jack?"
"Yes, Emperor. I have also tested the death beam, and have destroyed the planet Alderann, as per your wishes."
"Good! Good, yes. And Jata, I trust you have recovered the plans to the Death Ball?"
"Ummm...."
"What is it, Jata?"
"...we didn't find them."
"YOU WHAT?!!!? Of course this would happen! OF COURSE! I knew I should of have never trusted a cat with my plans! You have disappointed me, greatly. What's the matter with you all?"
"I'm sorry, Master Bino."
"You will ALL be sorry when I'm through with you! Conference over!"
The hologram disappeared. Admirial Griswold then turned to Jata, fuming.
"Great job, Darth! Now we made the Emperor angry!"
Jata promplty grabbed Griswold by the neck, choking him with all his might! A terrified Griswold struggled against his hand, before finally falling to the ground, deader than dead.
Grand Moff Jack looked around, and spotted Devo cleaning up Griswold's body, throwing the remains out the ship's chute into space.
"Mister Devo?"
"Yes, Master Jack?"
"You're the Admiral now. Good luck."
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The Falcon reached the Death Ball in due time. Solo was curious as they headed closer and closer towards it.
"What the heck kinda moon is that?"
"That's no moon.", replied Ben. "That's the Death Ball."
"It's a space station!", cried Peanut.
"Yes, Peanut, yes it is." Ben turned to BR13-LL and KN9N. "I assume you little rascals have keeping the plans for this monstrosity in your pockets?"
"I have, sir.", replied BR13-LL, and he handed the plans to Ben. "Hmmm. Indeed." He turned to Peanut. "There is a magnetic force field around all entrances into the Death Ball, preventing enemy ships from even passing near it. A large heating vent all around the ball, referred to in the blueprints as a 'trench' , leads to a weak spot somewhere in the center. Shoot the weak spot, and the entire station will self-destruct."
"This is bad.", Solo said, when suddenly the Death Ball's magnetic field began drawing them in.
"Oh, no!", cried Ben.
"Holy Carp!", screamed Peanut.
"Hold on!", cried Solo. Bruno awoke, and slammed into him, terrified. As a result, he lost control of the ship as it crashed into the Death Ball's loading docks.
"Oooh, I think I broke my spleen..."
Lois and Poncho hovered over the falcon. Lois grinned; "Welcome to the Death Ball, prisoners."
Sarah was afraid, so she lied and said, “I did not laugh.” But [The LORD] said, “Yes, you did laugh.” - Genesis 18:15 (NIV).
"Where's Ben?", cried out young Peanut Skywalker as Lois and Poncho, two Imperial storm-troopers, began carrying Peanut, his partner Max Solo, Max's co-pilot Bruno, and their droids BRL13-LL and KN9N away from the smoldering wreckage of Solo's ship, the Millennium Falcoln. "Where's Ben?!"
"Shut up!", screamed Lois as she prodded Peanut's shoulder with her fazer.
"Oof!"
"My ship!", cried Solo as Poncho carried him away. "My beautiful ship! Destroyed... again! AGONY!"
Suddenly, through all the frackas, Peanut heard the distant sound of a WOWOWHEHHHHWOWOHWOEO
"Ben!", cried Peanut as the elderly Blue Merle Ben Kenobi stormed in, dispatching the surprised Poncho with his light-saber and knocking Lois unconscious using the power of the force.
Ben tossed Peanut his father's lightsaber, which he found in the rubble. "Hurry, we don't have much time!"
The saber made a quick, loud WHOOSH sound as Peanut turned it on; it emitted a greenish glow.
"How did you do that?!", asked Solo, referring to his attack on Lois.
"The force. A mystical property that binds all living things together. Legend says a particularly wise Jedi can maniuplate the force to do his bidding, as well, I just did. Now, come on!"
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"Here, you two put these on"
Ben handed Solo and Peanut the now-naked Lois and Poncho's storm-troopers suits; Peanut chuckled a little. He admitted that Lois and Poncho looked almost comical, stuck unconcious in a corner, naked.
"What do we do?", asked Solo.
"You'll free the Princess disguised as Storm-Trooers. Meanwhile, the droids will repair your ship and I shall distract the Empire."
"Just how do you plan to do that?"
Ben winced a little; he looked over at Peanut, playing with Lois' fazer. So Innocent, playful, child-like. He sighed.
"I'll.... Look, it will make sense later. Now move it!"
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Grape toyed around with a peice of red yarn in her dungeon-cell. She sighed.
"Princess Grape.", said a lanky looking storm-troopers on the other side of her cold, iron cell-bars.
Grape looked peeved. "Aren't you a little short to he a storm-trooper?"
Peanut took off his mask. "Grape, I'm Peanut Skywalker. I'm working for the rebels, I've come to rescue you."
Suddenly, Peanut heard a scream. He saw a terrified Max Solo running towards, being chased by Storm-Troopers, carrying his mask in his hands.
"What?-"
"Peanut! Princess! They found us out! RUN!!!!"
Peanut and the Princess obliged, and ran as fast as their little legs could carry them to the main corridor. Max shot beams from his fazer at the storm-troopers...
Sarah was afraid, so she lied and said, “I did not laugh.” But [The LORD] said, “Yes, you did laugh.” - Genesis 18:15 (NIV).
The group ran towards the main corridor of the Death Ball base, Max Solo shooting lazers from his fazer at the approaching Storm Trooper guards.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Meanwhile, Lois and Poncho awoke, rather confused about their nakedness. They looked around, finding themselves in a strange, dark, damp and musky room. They saw a light above them, from a hatch of some sort, which was being closed by...
....a mischievous-looking Ben Kenobi!
"Just thought I'd relocate you to a more suitable area.", said the grinning Ben.
"Hey, where do you think you're going, old man?"
"I wouldn't want to stay to see the carnage, now would I?"
"Carnage? Wha-"
Lois and Poncho looked behind to see a large, green ozzing mass of tentacles and plant-matter, that was alive, looking hungirly at them. They held each-other, terrified.
"AHHHHHH!
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"I'll hold them off! Grape, take this!"
Solo threw a fazer at Grape, who caught it in her hands.
"Thanks."
"No problem!"
Grape and Peanut ran into a large room, stuck on a narrow ledge, with a pit leading down into the deepest parts of the Death Ball below them.
Peanut grabbed a peice of rope, attached it to his light-saber, and threw it across the pit; the saber got caught in a hook atop a door on the ledge on the other side, creating a primitive grappling hook. Storm-troopers shot at the door they were behind, attempting to get inside the room.
"Hold on.", Peanut said to Grape, his companion.
They jumped across the pit, holding onto the rope, and swiftly made it to the other-side. The storm-troopers entered the room after jamming open the door, but the two heroes had already fled, confusing them.
"Where did they go!??", cried Daryl, a storm-trooper commander.
Fat Daryl, one of the bulkier storm-troopers and Daryl's brother, walked into the room, eating a donut.
"Hi, guys. What did I miss?"
Daryl facepalmed.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Peanut and Grape ran into Solo and Bruno in the main corridor.
"How'd you guys get here so fast?", asked Max Solo. He took a quick look at the Princess. "Hey, you're kinda cute."
The princess chuckled. "Not so bad yourself."
"MAAAAAA!", yelled Bruno.
"Alright, alright!", cried Solo, when the Strom-Troopers ran into the room.
"End of the line, pals!", cried Commander Daryl.
"Run!", cried Solo. He shot a few quick shots at the Imperial guards. Grape shot Daryl in the leg, and he went down to the ground, in pain.
"Oof!"
"Quick! Into the garbage chute!", cried Grape. The others followed her, sliding down a long metal tube back to the main lobby of the Death Ball.
"WEEEEEE!!!", cried Solo. He held onto Grape. Peanut was excited; Bruno looked scared.
They landed in the lobby, and BR13-LL approached, KN9N holding a wrench in his mouth cutely.
"Hello! We've finished repairs on the Falcoln, Master Skywalker!"
"Good!", replied Peanut.
"Not so fast, rebels.", said a dark, deep, sinister and sinful voice that struck fear into all presents' hearts. A voice so terrifying, electric and inhuman, that it could only belong to one, sick twisted evil man...
"Darth Jata".
Sarah was afraid, so she lied and said, “I did not laugh.” But [The LORD] said, “Yes, you did laugh.” - Genesis 18:15 (NIV).
Darth Jata grabbed out his red lightsaber, and moved towards the group, menacingly.
"Hey, Darth!"
Jata turned around to see Ben Kenobi, brandishing his signature blue lightsaber.
"You!!!!"
"Long time, no see.", replied Ben, as he grabbed his saber, flicking it on. He moved towards Darth, with a confident swagger. "Let's finish our little feud, shall we?"
Jata and Kenobi began battling with their sabers, reminding Peanut of a sort of elegant swordfight. They dashed around the lobby, their sabers cutting any and every price of machinery in their way. They practically destroyed the room, and it was filling up with smoke from their brawl. Wires tore to shreds, while their aging but still agile bodies found around the room in a dizzying display of extreme, coordianted violence.
"Run, Peanut! To the ship!", cried Max Solo. Peanut got into the now repaired Millennium Falcon when suddenly he saw...
...Darth Jata, stabbing Kenobi in the gut, killing him!
"N-ugh..."
"BEN!!!!", cried Peanut, but Bruno pulled him into the ship. Jata grabbed a ray+gun from Daryl, whose leg was bleeding through it's bandages, and he shot at the now speeding away Falcon.
"Bruno! Thrusters!"
Bruno growled, as she pulled a lever on Falcon's control panel. The ship zoomed off at light-speed, and Grape held onto a now blushing Solo as they landed on the Planet of Yavin...
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Emperor Bino's stern face penetrated the eyes of all present. The Emperor, who to say was upset at the rebel's escape was a massive understatement, had decided to make another hologram conference on the Death Ball, as the Empire's leaders brainstormed their Plan-B.
"This isn't just bad. This is an outright catastrophy! If anyone finds out we were bested by a little boy, a murderous drunkard, two busted droids and a bear our very control over the galaxy is done for!", Bino cried.
"I say we instill fear into the rebels. Back them into submission.", Jack mused.
"How do you suppose we do that, Jack?!"
"We destroy their base. Once they have no base, they have no place to gather. Their sense of community will be destroyed, and any safe feeling they've had will be eradicated once they realize we have uncovered their biggest (and so far, only) secret!"
"Yeah, good luck on that. How we supposed to find out where they're hiding?", the green-furred, obnxoiuslly sarcastic General Yelpis retorted.
Darth Jata shot a mean glance at Yelpis, causing him to suddenly feel a sharp pain in is chest. He clutched his neck, a look of terror on his face, as his eyes pooled with salty water. He fell over, dead.
"Your lack of faith disturbs me.", Jata said.
Jack clasped his hands together. "I've managed to plant a tracking device on the Millennium Falcon using a slingshot. If all goes well, the ship has landed on the planet hosting the rebel base and we've got an easy victory. Roll out, boys!"
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Max took a swig of orange soda, as he looked over the vast jungles of Yavin. He had to admit, the planet was beautiful.
But the periwinkle cat who sat next to him was more beautiful.
Too bad he couldn't have her.
Princess Grape looked over the forests, and tried to hold her companion's hand. Solo jerked it away.
"Why so resistant?", she asked him.
"I don't know." He looked and sounded rather gruff; he turned to his ship; "But I think I'll have to leave."
"But why! You don't have any reason to..."
"Look, baby. I've made the crime-lord Jabba mad. I've killed one of his subordinates, and here I go, candooling with a princess, wrecking his ship numerous times in one night and helping rebels. I'm a dead man if I stay here. I'm sorry, me and Bruno are gonna have to leave."
"MAAAA!", Bruno was reluctant.
"Come on Bruno!"
"MAAAA!"
As Max walked towards his ship, a buzzing noise was heard above the skyline.
"What th-?!"
"Greetings, rebels!", called out Grand Moff Jack from his star destroyer. "It's my understanding the Government of Yavin had allowed you safe passage on their lovely planet, is it not?" He threw a bag down towards the rebels; Grape opened it and backed away, disgusted: the bag contained the King of Yavin's head!
"Since Yavin has no more government to speak of, thanks to Jata's marvelous "skills", we, the Empire, feel free to take what is ours... your lives."
Storm-Troopers, who had been hiding in the vast forests of Yavin, moved out, firing at the rebels.
"Holy Carp!", cried out Solo.
Peanut, Grape, and their droids (and Bruno) fled the scene, getting into the Millennium Falcon.
"I sense a tracking device has been attached to the ship's legs, good sir!", cried BR13-LL.
Grape shot a glare at Max Solo.
"It's not my fault... Okay, maybe it is, but still!"
"MAAAAAAA!"
The falcon shot off at light-speed, warping into space along with a few other rebel starships, the Empire's forces in hot pursuit.
"Hold on!"
Sarah was afraid, so she lied and said, “I did not laugh.” But [The LORD] said, “Yes, you did laugh.” - Genesis 18:15 (NIV).
The rebels gathered in a makeshift "conference" aboard Solo's ship; most of their numbers had either be captured by the Empire or went into hiding; those who were captured either joined the Empire as Storm-Troopers, had been put into prison, or had been killed. It was a very dark time for the rebellion.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Peanut tended to his droids, BR13-LL and KN9N, fixing them up with a screw-driver or cleaning them. He had been trying to hide his sadness over not only his Aunt and Uncle's, but not Ben Kenobi's deaths at the hands of the empire. He could just barely manage, and very soon, as in right now, he broke down...crying.
Grape went to see him.
"Is everything alright, Peanut?" She offered a comforting hand on the crying pointer-dog's shoulders.
"No.", he said, grimly. "Nothing is alright. And it will never be."
Solo entered the room. "Don't beat yourself up, kid. Just because not everything's always gonna be sunshine and rainbows doesn't mean the Galaxy's gone to carp; just the opposite. The best people in the world often go through the worst things imagineable." He turned to Peanut, holding his chin in his paws. "Pesnut, did you know that Kenobi's padawan (Jedi apprentice) turned to the dark side? Or that more than half of all the Jedi in the Galaxy we're killed in the Clone Wars? And Kenobi was there to see his master die?"
Peanut shook his head; no.
"It's all in the history-books. You liked Kenobi, didn't you?"
Peanut nodded.
"And he went through far, far more suffering than you can ever imagine. So don't dampen your outlook on life; in fact, you should be happy right now. Because the more you suffer now, the more you'll be rewarded later."
Peanut looked solemn. "I don't think that's how it works, Maxwell."
Max looked peeved. "Well, if you don't want my advice don't go asking for it!"
"But, I didn't ask y-"
"Shut up kid!", Max screeched as he left the room.
Grape looked at Peanut as she walked outside. "It's gonna be alright, Peanut. Just be hopeful."
Peanut gulped.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Peanut boarded into a rebel star-fighter stationed on a makeshift base set up on the ice-planet Hoth.
"Hey, Peanut!"
Peanut turned around to see his old friend, Kevin Starkiller.
"Andy! I haven't seen you since Obedience School!" He hugged the bigger dog.
"Good to see you too, Nutty Buddy." He gave him a noogie.
Grape spoke through a megaphone; Solo was by her side.
"Listen up, rebels! The Empire has taken away our homes, loved ones and even our own minds away from us! This has gone on for far too long! Will we stand for it?"
"NO!", nearly a thousand voices cried.
"We won't stand for it! Ready ourselves!" She pulled out the plans to the Death Ball and held them for all the crowd to see; "These are the plans for the Death Ball! Study them carefully! We must infiltrate the trench of the station and destroy the weak spot! Hear me?"
"YES, PRINCESS GRAPE!", cried out the thousand voices.
"Good! Now, march!"
The rebels boarded their starships and turned them on, heading for the Death Ball.
Last edited by Harry Johnathan on Sun Jan 24, 2021 9:08 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Sarah was afraid, so she lied and said, “I did not laugh.” But [The LORD] said, “Yes, you did laugh.” - Genesis 18:15 (NIV).
Thanks for the criticisms, Dayzee, Trekkie, Hagus and SeanWolf! Wish that people would comment more, but hey, can't complain with these fine guys (and gals) commenting on my work!
BTW, Dayzee, I've adapted the Trash Compactor scene with Lois and Poncho's deaths; it's not a perfect recreation of the scene, and I was actually gonna cut it out entirely, but decided to at-least nod to it with that. Also, you'll see who I've picked to get eaten by the Sarlacc soon... (Hint: it's a certain charming young woman you all adore)
Sarah was afraid, so she lied and said, “I did not laugh.” But [The LORD] said, “Yes, you did laugh.” - Genesis 18:15 (NIV).
Sort of hoping that the character you picked to get eaten would be a guy character instead of a girl only because and this isn't a spoiler now, Boba Fett survives somehow. I would like whoever it is to survive be a tough as nails hunk. Almost like Grape and her hunks! xD
Grand Moff Jack paced around the conference hall of the Death Ball, when a hologram of Emperor Bino appeared on the display table.
"You have served me well, Master Jack. If the mission is a success, I shall reward you with high-office in the Imeprial court."
Jack leaned meanly against the table, displaying a horrible, cocky grin.
"And if it fails?"
"Then I'll have to kill you. And curse your bloodline"
Jack stepped back. "Fair enough."
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The rebels boarded their ships and began flying towards the Death Ball trench.
Peanut heard a flickering voice through his headset; "Peanut? This is Kevin on Rogue Two, ready to enter the trench run and blast the Death Ball's weak spot. Roger?"
"Roger."
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Meanwhile, Princess Grape and Max Solo watched as KN9N hacked into the mainframe of the Empire's computer-systems, switching off the tractor beam!
"Good work, KN!", cried BR13-LL. He petted the ferret droid.
KN9N gave a happy little 'dook'.
Max looked outside. "I think I better get going now..."
"Not so fast.", said Princess Grape, who promplty kissed him.
Max looked amazed. "Woah, mama!"
They kissed again.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Jack looked out the window of the Death Ball, confused. "What in the holy name of Christ is going on out there?"
An Imperial guard promplty answered thus; "Sir, it appears that rebel soilders have somehow managed to turn off the tractor-beam and are heading for the trech run!"
Jack slapped the officer. "I know they're heading for the trench! Now get your men to man the guns!" Jack grabbed his fazer; "This is civil war."
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The rebels flew towards the Death Ball's trench. Imperial gunners shot at their every turn, and Kevin's starship was shot down!
"KEVIN!", screamed Peanut, but Kevin was long-gone, his body and the smoldering remains of his starship flying through the galaxy.
Peanut jammed the thrusters, flying at high-speeds past the other rebels and shooting at the TIE Fighters sent by the Empire's defenses to squash the rebellion.
Peanut's ship ran out of power, and began falling into the deepest parts of the trench. Peanut felt like he was dying; he knew he was gonna die. What other fate does one have whilst falling into an abyss? He thought he saw Ben Kenobi in the sky; No, that had to be a trick of the light. He was falling, falling, when suddenly he was saved by the surprise arrival of...
MAX SOLO, on the Millennium Falcon!
Peanut landed with a THUMP! onto the Falcon's roof, and slid into the ship through a hatch.
"Max!", cried Peanut. He ran towards Max and gave him a brief hug; the black cat blushed a bit at Peanut's next question. "Why are you covered in kisses?"
"Hold on!", Max yelled. "Bruno, thrusters!"
"MAAAA!!!!", Bruno cried as she pushed a blue button on the control panel, causing the Millennium Falcon to fly at light-speed.
"Hey, we're going at twelve parsecs!"
"Yeah, this baby may not look like much, but my ship's got it where it counts!"
The ship flew towards the Death Ball's center, and reached the weak spot in record time.
Princess Grape, also aboard, called to Max Solo, saying; "Fire!"
"Yes, M'am!"
Max fired a single shot from the Falcon's main gun at the weak spot, causing the Death Ball's self-destruct mechanism to activate.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"Everybody run!", screamed several Imperial guards, hurrying past the others, trampling each-other in a crazed frenzy to get to the last remaining escape pods.
As Jack headed towards a single escape-pod he was stopped by...
Darth Jata.
"Jata, this is important-"
Emperor Bino's hologram appeared from a small, black & white screen on Jata's chest-plate.
"You have failed me for the last time, Jack."
As Jata entered the escape-pod, Jack laughed madly, knowing his fate.
The Death Ball exploded. The super-weapon meant to squash the rebels was now no more.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"Woah!", cried the heroes as Max Solo jammed the Millennium Falcon into warp speed, the ship flying past the now smoldering remains of the Death Ball.
Peanut looked up in the sky and saw...
...Darth Jata's escape pod, speeding off into the galaxy.
Peanut grimaced. He knew that, as long as Jata lived, the fight wasn't over.
In fact, could it ever be?
Sarah was afraid, so she lied and said, “I did not laugh.” But [The LORD] said, “Yes, you did laugh.” - Genesis 18:15 (NIV).
The planet of Yavin had been freed from Imperial rule, and it's palace was used to offer the rebels much-needed rest.
Peanut awoke to the sounds of thumping. He went off to the Princess' Chambers and saw hair flying all about the room, Max and the Princess grinning at each-other. Max saw Peanut and said;
"GET OUT"
Peanut chuckled and left them alone. He saw a Rebel fighter plating with a mega-ball that promptly slammed back into his face. Peanut thought it was rather amusing.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Princess Grape smiled as Max, Peanut, Bruno and the droids rode into the Yavin palace hall.
Princess Grape walked up the group, and gave them medals.
"MAAAAAAAAA!!!", Bruno cried when she didn't receive a medal.
"Alright, you too Bruno.", the said, giving the now rather pleased bear a shiny golden medal, tied by a string to her neck scruff.
Grape smiled at the heroes, then said...
"May the force be with you."
Peanut looked off to the side. He thought, just thought, that he saw Ben Kenobi in the crowd.
Hmph. Must've been a trick of the light.
THE END.
DIRECTED BY ROCK MILTON
BASED ON CHARACTERS CREATED BY GEORGE LUCAS
SCREENPLAY BY SASHA HARTFORD & FOX LINDBERGH
SCREENPLAY REVISIONS BY RES AUBURN
STORY BY GEORGE LUCAS & KEENE MILTON
MUSIC BY SASHA HARTFORD
WITH SONGS PERFORMED BY FIDDLER & KEYES
SOUND DESIGN BY REX HOLLOWAY
CATERING BY LUCRETIA MILTON, REX HOLLOWAY, JILL SANDWICH, Mrs. KRAVITZ & "DAISY"
STARRING PEANUT, RUFUS & GRAPE SANDWICH as "Skywalker" "The Princess" & "Ben Kenobi"
WITH KEVIN BEAUREGARDE
DARYL, "FAT DARYL", JACK AND PONCHO MILTON
LOIS WARD
CO-STARRING JILL AND EARL SANDWICH AS "Aunt" and "Uncle"
AND INTRODUCING KEENE & BREEL MILTON as "The Droids"
GUEST STARS GRISWOLD JENKINS, KARO COLLIE, & BINO BYRON as "THE EMPEROR"
PRODUCERS ROY DISNEY, GEORGE LUCAS, KEVIN FEIG, ROCK MILTON, DUCHESS COLLIE, and THE SANDWICHES
SCRIPT CONSULTANT DALLAS SMITH
LOCATION SCOUTING TRINKET + PONCHO
FUNDING BY THE GOD CLUB
SET DESIGNS BY KING MILTON
LEGAL CONSULTANT MR. LONDON
SPECIAL THANKS TO FIDO & JOEY BYRON & ZONDERVAN PUBLISHING, CO.
A FILM BY ROCK MILTON
A LUCASFILM, Ltd. PRODUCTION
A MILTON ENTERPRIZES CO-PRODUCTION
A 20th CENTURY KARISHAD PICTURE
THE STAR PETS WILL RETURN IN "BINO STRIKES BACK"
MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU
Sarah was afraid, so she lied and said, “I did not laugh.” But [The LORD] said, “Yes, you did laugh.” - Genesis 18:15 (NIV).
It is a dark time for THE REBELLION. Although the DEATH BALL has been destroyed, EMPEROR BINO'S troops have driven the Rebel forces from their hidden base and pursued them across the galaxy.
Evading the dreaded Imperial Starfleet, a group of freedom fighters led by war-hero PEANUT SKYWALKER has established a new secret base on the remote ice world of HOTH.
The evil lord DARTH JATA, obsessed with finding young SKYWALKER, has dispatched thousands of remote probes into the far reaches of space….
Sarah was afraid, so she lied and said, “I did not laugh.” But [The LORD] said, “Yes, you did laugh.” - Genesis 18:15 (NIV).
