"I swear to drunk I'm not God..."ChewyChewy wrote:"I'm not as think as you drunk I am."Obbl wrote:A cop pulls a man over for driving while drunk.
The man defends himself thusly:
"Misten, Lister, I only had ti martwonis, and I'm not as much under the afluence of incohol as some thinkle may peop."
here is one
"An officer pulls a old lady over. When he reaches her window he states, "Ma'am, I caught you speeding in this area, may I see your license and registration please?" The old lady looked at him for a moment and shook her head, "No.." The officer then asked, "Why not?" The woman replied, "Because I stole this car and the owner is tied up in the trunk.." fearing for someone's safety, the officer calls for backup. The chief of police soon arrives next to the old lady's car window, stating, "Ma'am, may I see the license and registration for this vehicle." She reached to her glove compartment and pulls out a few papers and hands it to the chief. After looking at it, he realizes that her identity matches the registration. He then asks, "Ma'am, can you open your trunk." He notices nothing but a spare tire, tire iron and a car jack. After a few moments of checking it out he returns to her window and says, "Ma'am I am confused, my officer told me that you had stolen this car and the owner was locked in the trunk..." The old lady looks him dead in the eye, "Yeah, I bet that liar told you I was speeding too..." "