Genesis This one is an exact match.Luna werewolf wrote:There seems practically no colours left.
Spud This; Pop This; Artemis This. Ok?
Alana This one could be acceptable.
Cesium I guess yours is brighter anyway.
Moderators: CyberDragon, Serence Frostbite
Genesis This one is an exact match.Luna werewolf wrote:There seems practically no colours left.
Spud This; Pop This; Artemis This. Ok?
EH HEM....color=#804000 is for Aethon actually |3Hypergenesis wrote:Genesis This one is an exact match.Luna werewolf wrote:There seems practically no colours left.
Spud This; Pop This; Artemis This. Ok?
Alana This one could be acceptable.
Cesium I guess yours is brighter anyway.
Sure, no problem. Will remove it on the next update.Hypergenesis wrote:Just a heads up, I'll be demoting Crayon from being a YsF main to a YsF guest effective immediately.
Reasons: there's quite a lot, but the main would probably because I didn't think too much about what would happen, something I usually do, and now the character *mutated* into something far from what I had originally planned.
so yeah, I can't play him as a main anymore. It's against my conscience to.
What for?Luna werewolf wrote:sorry.
Too bright. Can't see.Luna werewolf wrote:this as artemis
Yeah, that's what I mean. You are approved now, but any ideas on getting your character in game?simple things wrote:Also did you mean the last few pages of the in character thread?
No votes needed, since Crayon has just stopped being a main character.The Moon Howler wrote:I like that char, If he needs votes to enter - I give mine
Now just going to go ahead give you the heads up that while this is allowed for descriptions, it does not give the privilege for some earth-shattering tech. After all, a plasma trash incinerator can sure be built if you have the money and the intelligence but just taking into account the effort to actually make one would be highly unfeasible and just having ordered those materials would have your character in the government's watch list.simple things wrote:Alexander enjoys building small contraptions and devices that help with everyday life, he also enjoys cooking with his mother.
Eeh, you don't need to read the whole thing, the last few pages will do. Besides unless you are Peanut, chances are you won't be able to finish 85+ pages in a few hours.simple things wrote:GUHH,... ermm .. give me a few hours i'll read the WHOLE THING... then ill make up some GABALA BLAHH and then ill give the verdict
I am not understanding this, Richard could have been a worker even before Alexander was born. The facts we have here are:Hypergenesis wrote:I would assume that that's 16 HUMAN years considering the fact that the company is a computer company which would mean that Richard was a worker of Vortrax who was working on his promotions, this would fit with your backstory that "he lived most of his life in the city until his father became a success...". Legally speaking, if that's 16 PET years, then it implies Richard pocketed company funds... Quite a lot too. ^ w^
This I agree. A CEO doesn't actually own the company. And yes, nobody in their right mind would just "shut down" a successful company, he could at least sell the company or something.Hypergenesis wrote:Now as to why Richard would be able to let the company be inherited by his pet when he was merely a CEO will probably forever elude me, but the fact that the company was closed by the death of a CEO, despite the company being hugeky successful, is pecking "shady" in the back of my mind. In fact, just from this point itself I would say the reason they moved would be something gravely more serious than what's said by your story...
Adding to this, closing a company prematurely would incur a series of heavy costs, investigations and a lot of time. Even much more considering it was a very successful company.
... Actually, talking about CEOs.. That would mean Vortrax was a corporation and the shareholders would have had their shares refunded and... <Most would know what should be here. If you don't, I still won't tell so go ask someone else.>
I don't think he will have "earth-shattering techs" since he wrote "small contraptions and devices that help with everyday life". Though over-convenient things that doesn't make sense are not allowed too, so I am trusting simple things not to build any mini-computers or contraptions that doesn't make sense or uses fictional technologies.Hypergenesis wrote:Well enough of my usual way of criticism. Actually ignore all that like most would and let's just go into simple criticism.Now just going to go ahead give you the heads up that while this is allowed for descriptions, it does not give the privilege for some earth-shattering tech. After all, a plasma trash incinerator can sure be built if you have the money and the intelligence but just taking into account the effort to actually make one would be highly unfeasible and just having ordered those materials would have your character in the government's watch list.simple things wrote:Alexander enjoys building small contraptions and devices that help with everyday life, he also enjoys cooking with his mother.
I don't know about this and I will let you two sort it out.Hypergenesis wrote:The thing with the nose is bothering me as well. Does he have anosmia? I know about lavender and it's no scent that can be easily ignored or not smelled if it's that close to him, much more that people are able to smell it.
I don't get this; What alien leader?Hypergenesis wrote:The alien leader is a successful leader... Seriously, I don't buy it, but since stranger things have passed I'll let that slide.
Well, you know I don't pay that much attention, Nitz. And I can step in if things are a bit too much.Hypergenesis wrote:and there's Part 1 of my criticism, the rest will be buried for the rest of time unless you want me to PM it to you. Well, GM agreed anyways so as long as you don't power play because your character is rich, I won't have a problem with you in this neighborhood.
Ok...wow, ERM I now realise that there is allot that does not make sense about my character and i thank you for delving...this far into it. Alright let me just say i really didn't think that it would matter, since i was already accepted into the neighbourhood. Aquablaster had pointed out to me, that 5ft 10in was a little bit too tall for a pet, from this i figured he had read over my post and that the height was the only exception. even then i really didn't take my characters background too seriously. And i apologise but i feel that it was not necessary for you to do this.Hypergenesis wrote:
I would assume that that's 16 HUMAN years considering the fact that the company is a computer company which would mean that Richard was a worker of Vortrax who was working on his promotions, this would fit with your backstory that "he lived most of his life in the city until his father became a success...". Legally speaking, if that's 16 PET years, then it implies Richard pocketed company funds... Quite a lot too. ^ w^
Alright, WHOA I do not understand what you mean but this, are you quoting something?. Also i never mentioned anything about aliens. On another note... what do you mean you will let that slide? are you a GM? or mod?.Hypergenesis wrote:
The alien leader is a successful leader... Seriously, I don't buy it, but since stranger things have passed I'll let that slide.
Alright i can understand what you mean, my character having a large sum of money is putting him, at an advantage. But then again he's not going to go around buying mansions. Also what do you mean...YOU...wont have a problem with me...im sorry...what??.Hypergenesis wrote:
so as long as you don't power play because your character is rich, I won't have a problem with you in this neighborhood.
Ok, i was still accepted into the neighbourhood, didn't think this would be a huge deal. thanks for the idea of anosmia, i will put this as the reason. Thank you.Hypergenesis wrote:
The thing with the nose is bothering me as well. Does he have anosmia? I know about lavender and it's no scent that can be easily ignored or not smelled if it's that close to him, much more that people are able to smell it.
Aright guys, i am fully realising that i obviously have not put in enough time and effort into this I am sure that CEO is the owner of the company, like Steve jobs is to Apple. I am also noob at understanding CEO. What i meant is that Richard OWNED the company Vortrax and with time and effort he became successful from the technologies that were made from the corporation. I will change this so that when he died he left Nisha as the CEO... BUT WAIT thought she was a Reel estate agent...scratch that. she will leave on flight to sign the important papers and what not, while the the second in command does most of the managing. Then why move from city to beach to city again...well lets just say Nisha and Alexander didn't exactly live in the most pet friendly city. Also they weren't entirely happy on moving any where that was not developed. YsF happened to be a pet friendly city...how convenient.Aquablast wrote:
You might want to revisit that part a little, simple things! I suggest you remove the whole "he told Alexander that he did not want him to continue the company, and so it was shut down" and just simply say "he left a large sum of money with Alexander and Nisha" without getting into too much detail.
Aquablast wrote:-scythed-
Okay I think I need to explain things more. XDsimple things wrote:-scythed-
CEOs of a company do not have paychecks in the millions, their gross annual income *might* break into the millions if they're in the top 200 companies (which is not limited to one field of the market) but then factor in tax and their lifestyle then you're still left with 6 digits. The thing about why CEOs are rich are due to compensations and these compensations are disguised as "company privileges", the compensations alone account to almost ten times their gross annual income and it's not even taxed against them but towards the company instead. But we're here to talk about RP so I'll stop there.Aquablast wrote:I am not understanding this, Richard could have been a worker even before Alexander was born. The facts we have here are:Hypergenesis wrote:I would assume that that's 16 HUMAN years considering the fact that the company is a computer company which would mean that Richard was a worker of Vortrax who was working on his promotions, this would fit with your backstory that "he lived most of his life in the city until his father became a success...". Legally speaking, if that's 16 PET years, then it implies Richard pocketed company funds... Quite a lot too. ^ w^
- Alexander was adopted when he was a pup
- Richard wasn't "a success" before Alexander was adopted
- Alexander was adopted even before Richard married her wife, Nisha (if I read it right)
- Alexander lived in the city for most of his life (which is probably around 3 years)
- They moved to Yorkshire Field after Richard passed away
This probably means that Richard got cancer not too long after his success and his marriage, and Alexander didn't actually live near the beach for that long. But I don't see why Alexander must be there when Richard started working at the computer company.
I'm using the word alien here as "Unfamiliar and disturbing or distasteful" in meaning, I would usually use "extraterrestrial" for the one you're thinking of. I'm using the word alien to summarize what was given as his personality quoting:Aquablast wrote:I don't get this; What alien leader?Hypergenesis wrote:The alien leader is a successful leader... Seriously, I don't buy it, but since stranger things have passed I'll let that slide.
It reads "Don Quixote" to me with people finding him funny. This was in here because I misunderstood this part:[quote='simple things"] Alexander would normally watch his father Richard working in the company, he would take notes on how he would instruct his workers, and how he would get the job done.[/quote]More precisely the last part in which it says that "how he would get the job done". Basically I was trying to say that leadership is not something so easily passed and what works for one will not always apply to another.simple things wrote:Alexander is very kind, and somewhat eccentric. He smiles most of the time,and can be weired but people think he is being funny so he laughs with them. he is normally in his own thoughts of worlds imagining fantasy and si-fi; and fighting great warriors. this is normally a projection of how the warrior is the killer and he is trying to save his father. After this he would normally wake up. Alexander generally prefers being alone, but then again he has never had a real friend. he’s quiet but he likes to be loud sometimes.
It was simply a quality check actually, but it just so happens that you never indicated whether it was human years or pet years. Now with such an extensive history and data before me, I tried to piece together a scenario based on it and present it with my conclusion on whether it was pet or human years. Unnecessary, not exactly but I could have been a bit more discreet as a majority of people probably dislikes having detailed reviews. I like people who go into such detail in building their character and I assume these people are doing this to have their characters in a definite stage in their lives. Contradiction by this point are fatal to character building so I do everything I can to remedy these contradictions or at least delve into it to pinpoint where the contradictions are. So seeing the long detail-y sheet you provided, I did what I did.simple things wrote:Ok...wow, ERM I now realise that there is allot that does not make sense about my character and i thank you for delving...this far into it. Alright let me just say i really didn't think that it would matter, since i was already accepted into the neighbourhood. Aquablaster had pointed out to me, that 5ft 10in was a little bit too tall for a pet, from this i figured he had read over my post and that the height was the only exception. even then i really didn't take my characters background too seriously. And i apologise but i feel that it was not necessary for you to do this.Hypergenesis wrote:
I would assume that that's 16 HUMAN years considering the fact that the company is a computer company which would mean that Richard was a worker of Vortrax who was working on his promotions, this would fit with your backstory that "he lived most of his life in the city until his father became a success...". Legally speaking, if that's 16 PET years, then it implies Richard pocketed company funds... Quite a lot too. ^ w^
A lightsaber is a device, the wheel was once a contraption. Plans for a space shuttle can be found in the internet, I had a classmate who was already making motion detectors when he was 15 and your character is RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICH *ka-ching*. Yes I agree that a 16 year old will not be able to build such things, but that would probably only extend until before your computer screen. In the world of digital writing, it would probably be harder to successfully buy a loaf of bread from another player than to make a black hole tracker satellite. Going back to my post itself "Now just going to go ahead give you the heads up that while this is allowed for descriptions, it does not give the privilege for some earth-shattering tech." was simply informing you that it is not a valid reason to have swiss army kitchen tool around the house.simple things wrote:Alright, i don't know if i said this differently than how i wanted it to be, but i said he enjoys building small Contraptions and Devices .I am pretty sure that was self explanitory if not then i apologise. He's not going to build an ion beam teleporter or, something crazy like that, thats not even possible. And even so where would a 16 year old gain the knowledge to build technology so sophisticated, or even the parts..make emm...i dont think so.Hypergenesis said:
Now just going to go ahead give you the heads up that while this is allowed for descriptions, it does not give the privilege for some earth-shattering tech. After all, a plasma trash incinerator can sure be built if you have the money and the intelligence but just taking into account the effort to actually make one would be highly unfeasible and just having ordered those materials would have your character in the government's watch list.
As explained above, this was here because I misunderstood a trait you had given your character.simple things wrote:Alright, WHOA I do not understand what you mean but this, are you quoting something?. Also i never mentioned anything about aliens. On another note... what do you mean you will let that slide? are you a GM? or mod?.Hypergenesis wrote:
The alien leader is a successful leader... Seriously, I don't buy it, but since stranger things have passed I'll let that slide.
It's simply irking to have someone who is only focused on the success of their character. The "problem" there is more of a concise placeholder for "I will keep on interfering in what you do because you are going beyond what your character should be able to do." Buying a mansion is fine for me so long as your character does have that much money, but buying a mansion and having it delivered by helicopter is not, no matter how much money your character have.simple things wrote:Alright i can understand what you mean, my character having a large sum of money is putting him, at an advantage. But then again he's not going to go around buying mansions. Also what do you mean...YOU...wont have a problem with me...im sorry...what??.Hypergenesis wrote:
so as long as you don't power play because your character is rich, I won't have a problem with you in this neighborhood.
No you don't, i should be apologising to you for what i said, it was wrong of me to say what i did. You were giving me criticism to help me out with my character and i was being utterly retarded. I am very sorry, i was rude and you did not deserve that. You are a good person and i am grateful for what you have done to help me. I look forward to meeting you in the IC thread. Once again i apologise, Thank you.Hypergenesis said
Okay I think I need to explain things more. XD
HAHAHAAAA, Oh man i didn't think anyone else knew about JAY NAYLOR COMICS. HAHA oh god im going to wake up my neighbours, And im sorry if that my character having a six pack annoys you. I can change it around as for the Jay Naylor comics...the one that mostly disturbs me is the one with the black and white cat guy. And he does things that cannot be stated in this post. With like 4 different girls....man it was so messed up...(*vomits*) AHEM...any way thank you very much for the input. I have learned that you can't always argue with people. Who are just trying to help you.RockstarRaccoon said:
For someone with a name like "Simple Things" your characters are INTENSELY furry
O Ao? I didn't really feel you were being rude.simple things wrote:No you don't, i should be apologising to you for what i said, it was wrong of me to say what i did. You were giving me criticism to help me out with my character and i was being utterly retarded. I am very sorry, i was rude and you did not deserve that. You are a good person and i am grateful for what you have done to help me. I look forward to meeting you in the IC thread. Once again i apologise, Thank you.Hypergenesis said
Okay I think I need to explain things more. XD
Aw, bye (from YsF) then valerio.valerio wrote:sorry, folks, but I must discontinue my presence at YF.
Honestly, I just can't come up with a decent idea for my characters, so i'll drop it and leave a free slot for new applicants.
It's been fun, all the same.
Yes, he is my (super-critical) number one assistant. Where Aqua misses most details, Nitz picks ALL of them up! ... Though half of them are stuff I deem unimportant.Hypergenesis wrote:Oh and I'm the assistant resident GM.
Not trying to scare you, but I can pull back my approval if I find it necessary... So, watch out!simple things wrote:Alright let me just say i really didn't think that it would matter, since i was already accepted into the neighbourhood
*Smacks ST with a rolled-up newspaper* Hey, stop calling yourself retard!simple things wrote:Yeah im like mentally Retarded, lol. Oh well thank you, you know you took the time out to write all that...im just...im going shut up now.
i'll be updating my Bio and then...TEH INTRO
Aww... Bye!valerio wrote:sorry, folks, but I must discontinue my presence at YF.
Honestly, I just can't come up with a decent idea for my characters, so i'll drop it and leave a free slot for new applicants.
It's been fun, all the same.
OWW..IT...IT BURNS. Even out of the irc...it...BURNSAquablast said:
*Smacks ST with a rolled-up newspaper* Hey, stop calling yourself retard!
And to think I was already limiting myself in my posts o 3o...Aquablast wrote:Yes, he is my (super-critical) number one assistant. Where Aqua misses most details, Nitz picks ALL of them up! ... Though half of them are stuff I deem unimportant.