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Attack the above poster 
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Joined: Wed May 16, 2018 10:32 am
Posts: 18
Location: Washington State
Post Re: Attack the above poster
Dang. I use my TRUMP card!

>w<

My accomplices stir up anger between America and Russia... then decide to try and resurrect me somehow.

They do... with science and stuff... on a submarine... like all the great superheroes!

Anyway America and the tiny bit of Russia that is left and all of both sides' allies, duke it out, trading nukes to the death of everyone and thing on the surface of the planet.


Tue Jun 05, 2018 10:43 pm
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Joined: Mon Oct 02, 2017 9:09 pm
Posts: 1602
Post Re: Attack the above poster
Well, as sole survivor, I pull out my Glock and attack ... oh ... wait ... that's right ... aw, crumbs ............. sigh.


Fri Jun 08, 2018 6:25 pm
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Joined: Wed May 16, 2018 10:32 am
Posts: 18
Location: Washington State
Post Re: Attack the above poster
Then, we all wake up.

I, irrationally and furiously, attack Weston with a foam Nerf sword!


Sat Jun 09, 2018 12:59 pm
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Joined: Mon Oct 02, 2017 9:09 pm
Posts: 1602
Post Re: Attack the above poster
...and I retaliate by flattening you with my Nerf shield!


Sat Jun 09, 2018 7:44 pm
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Joined: Wed May 16, 2018 10:32 am
Posts: 18
Location: Washington State
Post Re: Attack the above poster
Nerf knife attack...

*Realizes how dumb this is*

Nerf gun attack!


Sun Jun 10, 2018 3:11 pm
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Joined: Mon Oct 02, 2017 9:09 pm
Posts: 1602
Post Re: Attack the above poster
Yeah, this whole Nerf thing is pretty drelbe....

Machete !!!!


Sun Jun 10, 2018 4:25 pm
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Joined: Wed May 16, 2018 10:32 am
Posts: 18
Location: Washington State
Post Re: Attack the above poster
FLAMETHROWER!!! DIIIIIIIIIIIIIE!


Sun Jun 10, 2018 4:42 pm
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Joined: Sun Mar 11, 2018 2:47 pm
Posts: 251
Location: The Planes of Oblivion
Post Re: Attack the above poster
Tomahawks! Tomahawks EVERYWHERE! ... Ill just go back to members vs mods, I'm no good at murdering my fellow humans... Or am I? TOMAHAWKS!!!

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Mon Jun 11, 2018 12:38 am
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Joined: Wed May 16, 2018 10:32 am
Posts: 18
Location: Washington State
Post Re: Attack the above poster
While you are turning your back I pick up a random stone and pelt it at the back of your head!


Mon Jun 11, 2018 1:03 am
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Joined: Mon Oct 02, 2017 9:09 pm
Posts: 1602
Post Re: Attack the above poster
While you turn your back, I employ my geological training to careful select a large, smooth metamorphic rock of exotic color and exacting weight and bounce it off your skull....


Mon Jun 11, 2018 8:38 pm
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Joined: Wed May 16, 2018 10:32 am
Posts: 18
Location: Washington State
Post Re: Attack the above poster
good thing I'm a time traveling wizard of AWESOMENESS! I teleport to the moment before you threw the rock and directly behind you!

*SMACK!*


Mon Jun 11, 2018 9:13 pm
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Joined: Mon Oct 02, 2017 9:09 pm
Posts: 1602
Post Re: Attack the above poster
...and I deflect your teleport, leaving you in the depths of the LaBrae Tar Pits, surrounded by the depraved spirits of extinct Pleistocene mammals with exaggerated dental characteristics and no visual entertainment.


Wed Jun 13, 2018 2:36 pm
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Joined: Wed May 16, 2018 10:32 am
Posts: 18
Location: Washington State
Post Re: Attack the above poster
Wow... Let's just hope I perish quickly... JK! I'm invulnerable to depraved souls! I... I uh... teleport back?

I hurl a mug in your general direction.


Wed Jun 13, 2018 6:46 pm
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Joined: Sun Mar 11, 2018 2:47 pm
Posts: 251
Location: The Planes of Oblivion
Post Re: Attack the above poster
Wow, sure is muggy today, I throw a set of dishes and an entire cupboard of silverware at your face

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Wed Jun 13, 2018 8:41 pm
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Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2015 9:26 pm
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Post Re: Attack the above poster
i steal a TARDIS and tele-frag your grandparents into red smears on the ground before they met eachother.

for those not familiar with the term, tele-fragging is making something explode by teleporting to a time and place it's already occupying, causing you to emerge inside it.

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Wed Jun 13, 2018 9:01 pm
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Joined: Sun Feb 10, 2013 2:14 pm
Posts: 11383
Location: Germany, Europe, Terra
Post Re: Attack the above poster
I smack your foot with a hammer.

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Thu Jun 14, 2018 3:06 pm
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Joined: Mon Oct 02, 2017 9:09 pm
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Post Re: Attack the above poster
I wallop you in the back of the head with a drenched terrycloth bathrobe. Forest green, by the way.


Thu Jun 14, 2018 7:07 pm
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Joined: Wed May 16, 2018 10:32 am
Posts: 18
Location: Washington State
Post Re: Attack the above poster
I force you to drink orange juice after brushing your teeth...


Thu Jun 14, 2018 10:22 pm
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Joined: Sun Mar 11, 2018 2:47 pm
Posts: 251
Location: The Planes of Oblivion
Post Re: Attack the above poster
I make you step on a lego

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Allons-y


Thu Jun 14, 2018 11:36 pm
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Joined: Wed May 16, 2018 10:32 am
Posts: 18
Location: Washington State
Post Re: Attack the above poster
I smack you with a frying pan!


Fri Jun 15, 2018 12:21 am
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Joined: Sun Mar 11, 2018 2:47 pm
Posts: 251
Location: The Planes of Oblivion
Post Re: Attack the above poster
I hit you in the face with a fire extinguisher.

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Fri Jun 15, 2018 9:21 am
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Joined: Wed May 16, 2018 10:32 am
Posts: 18
Location: Washington State
Post Re: Attack the above poster
DRIFTWOOD TO THE FACE!


Fri Jun 15, 2018 10:00 am
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Joined: Mon Oct 02, 2017 9:09 pm
Posts: 1602
Post Re: Attack the above poster
Oh no, the stench of your driftwood attracts a thousand enraged sea gulls. I helpfully point them in your direction... using extra ellipsis dots.


Fri Jun 15, 2018 4:22 pm
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Joined: Wed May 16, 2018 10:32 am
Posts: 18
Location: Washington State
Post Re: Attack the above poster
I throw your dang ellipses at you! THERE IS A PLENTIFUL SUPPLY OF OVERUSED ELLIPSES!


Fri Jun 15, 2018 6:26 pm
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Joined: Sun Mar 11, 2018 2:47 pm
Posts: 251
Location: The Planes of Oblivion
Post Re: Attack the above poster
Not feeling too creative... Let's just release a zombie plague upon you all.

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Allons-y


Sat Jun 16, 2018 12:49 am
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Joined: Wed May 16, 2018 10:32 am
Posts: 18
Location: Washington State
Post Re: Attack the above poster
Fortunately, my katana will now come in handy! After destroying some zombies I punch you!


Sat Jun 16, 2018 11:04 am
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Joined: Mon Oct 02, 2017 9:09 pm
Posts: 1602
Post Re: Attack the above poster
Excessive use of ellipsis periods has allowed me to store up tons of commas which I dump on everybody; resulting you all being swept away into a grammatical fire pit;

However, I'm now low on commas and periods so, until the next shipment arrives, I'm stuck with semi-colons:::


Sat Jun 16, 2018 11:48 am
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Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2015 9:26 pm
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Post Re: Attack the above poster
your grammatical atrocities offend so many people you get deported off earth into deep space.

In a shipping container.

that may not entirely be air tight.

how long can you hold your breath?

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Sat Jun 16, 2018 12:14 pm
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Joined: Wed May 16, 2018 10:32 am
Posts: 18
Location: Washington State
Post Re: Attack the above poster
Unfortunately everyone on earth has gotten fed up with your totally awesome ways of destroying your foes... and the earth... several times.

They decide to public ally execute you-

-r sick new moves!

In a tar pit.


Sat Jun 16, 2018 10:42 pm
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Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2015 9:26 pm
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Post Re: Attack the above poster
ungrateful little pests...

*snaps her fingers and disappears in a flash, a millisecond before the entire universe gets compacted down into a single infinitely dense atom that subsequently explodes and restarts everything.*

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Sun Jun 17, 2018 7:46 am
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Joined: Sun Feb 10, 2013 2:14 pm
Posts: 11383
Location: Germany, Europe, Terra
Post Re: Attack the above poster
I staple toilet paper to your ears.

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Sun Jun 17, 2018 9:17 am
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Joined: Wed May 16, 2018 10:32 am
Posts: 18
Location: Washington State
Post Re: Attack the above poster
I take out your kneecaps with a baseball bat.


Sun Jun 17, 2018 12:11 pm
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Joined: Sun Feb 10, 2013 2:14 pm
Posts: 11383
Location: Germany, Europe, Terra
Post Re: Attack the above poster
I stuff you into a tube and seal both ends.

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Sun Jun 17, 2018 3:01 pm
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Joined: Mon Oct 02, 2017 9:09 pm
Posts: 1602
Post Re: Attack the above poster
I bounce the tube off your head, knocking you flat.


Sun Jun 17, 2018 3:08 pm
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Joined: Wed May 16, 2018 10:32 am
Posts: 18
Location: Washington State
Post Re: Attack the above poster
I throw a half crazed, starving weasel at you!


Sun Jun 17, 2018 4:26 pm
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Joined: Mon Oct 02, 2017 9:09 pm
Posts: 1602
Post Re: Attack the above poster
SUMMON THE KRAKEN !!


Mon Jun 18, 2018 10:30 am
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Joined: Wed May 16, 2018 10:32 am
Posts: 18
Location: Washington State
Post Re: Attack the above poster
I summon a swarm of pelicans to eat your kraken!


Mon Jun 18, 2018 12:48 pm
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Joined: Mon Oct 02, 2017 9:09 pm
Posts: 1602
Post Re: Attack the above poster
I call forth a mob of EPA investigators who bury you in a blizzard of court citations for inciting an ornithological riot, littering the beach, violating the endangered species act, endangering the violated species act, acting the species violated endangerment, and breaking the rule against feeding the wildlife...


Mon Jun 18, 2018 1:24 pm
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Joined: Wed May 16, 2018 10:32 am
Posts: 18
Location: Washington State
Post Re: Attack the above poster
You can't prove anything! I shoot you in the leg and run!


Mon Jun 18, 2018 4:52 pm
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Joined: Mon Oct 02, 2017 9:09 pm
Posts: 1602
Post Re: Attack the above poster
Your running panicked prey behavior attracts the kraken, your pelicans, and a legion of deranged sunscreen basted tourists with tragically lethal consequences for you. Oh, and your estate still has to pay all the EPA fines.


Mon Jun 18, 2018 7:07 pm
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