Attack the above poster

For playing all sorts of silly I-don't-know-whats

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Buster
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Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Buster »

I staple your beak to your left foot
Most important thing I've learned from D&D?
No matter how tempting it may be, as a DM I can't both present a problem and solve it.
Every time a DMPC or NPC fixes something a payer couldn't i'm diminishing and undermining that player's contribution.
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D-Rock
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Re: Attack the above poster

Post by D-Rock »

I set up a dream catcher, which traps nightmares. Good luck getting out before the sun rises.
Faith doesn't change circumstances. Faith changes me.
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Buster
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Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Buster »

I tamper with your computer so you can no longer post anything containing the number 0.
Most important thing I've learned from D&D?
No matter how tempting it may be, as a DM I can't both present a problem and solve it.
Every time a DMPC or NPC fixes something a payer couldn't i'm diminishing and undermining that player's contribution.
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CyberDragon
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Re: Attack the above poster

Post by CyberDragon »

I hack your computer and lock it on a webpage that plays a nonstop remix of the most annoying sounds ever, while downloading hundreds of Gigabytes of sandwich recipes.
"It's not my job to seek the truth.
It's not my job to pick a side.
It's not my job to judge your sins.
It's my job to save your life."
-Champion Motto

Game Master for Beacon of Hope. The one and only superhero RP! Join here!
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Buster
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Location: Σ Disturbing Exploding Face

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Buster »

I remove the ethernet line from the server you live in and replace it with a 14k dial up modem.
Most important thing I've learned from D&D?
No matter how tempting it may be, as a DM I can't both present a problem and solve it.
Every time a DMPC or NPC fixes something a payer couldn't i'm diminishing and undermining that player's contribution.
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Unusuallynamedperson
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Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Unusuallynamedperson »

I bash your face in with my bells n howl terminal!
If I hit someone with a dictionary is that physical, or verbal assault?
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https://discord.gg/2Kwwv Housepets Discord link repaired!
Not A Furry

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Not A Furry »

I modify your spell checker so that it gets you in very embarrassing situations.
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Buster
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Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Buster »

I superglue a green and white rabbit themed fursuit onto you.
Most important thing I've learned from D&D?
No matter how tempting it may be, as a DM I can't both present a problem and solve it.
Every time a DMPC or NPC fixes something a payer couldn't i'm diminishing and undermining that player's contribution.
Not A Furry

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Not A Furry »

I superglue a red and white tnt to your butt

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CyberDragon
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Re: Attack the above poster

Post by CyberDragon »

I slap you with a trout.
"It's not my job to seek the truth.
It's not my job to pick a side.
It's not my job to judge your sins.
It's my job to save your life."
-Champion Motto

Game Master for Beacon of Hope. The one and only superhero RP! Join here!
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HellishK9
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Re: Attack the above poster

Post by HellishK9 »

I slap you with a beluga sturgeon.
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Not A Furry

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Not A Furry »

I slap you with a cake
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CyberDragon
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Re: Attack the above poster

Post by CyberDragon »

I slap you with a pie!
"It's not my job to seek the truth.
It's not my job to pick a side.
It's not my job to judge your sins.
It's my job to save your life."
-Champion Motto

Game Master for Beacon of Hope. The one and only superhero RP! Join here!
User avatar
Buster
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Posts: 5379
Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2015 9:26 pm
Location: Σ Disturbing Exploding Face

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Buster »

i fill up all available hard drive space, ram, and external storage in the system you live in with superfluous copies of minesweeper.
Most important thing I've learned from D&D?
No matter how tempting it may be, as a DM I can't both present a problem and solve it.
Every time a DMPC or NPC fixes something a payer couldn't i'm diminishing and undermining that player's contribution.
Not A Furry

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Not A Furry »

I grant you immortality and throw you into the sun
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Buster
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Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Buster »

i grab hold of your wrist and pull you along for the ride.
Most important thing I've learned from D&D?
No matter how tempting it may be, as a DM I can't both present a problem and solve it.
Every time a DMPC or NPC fixes something a payer couldn't i'm diminishing and undermining that player's contribution.
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CyberDragon
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Joined: Wed Feb 01, 2017 12:41 am
Location: The Depths of Cyberspace

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by CyberDragon »

I upload a virus onto your computer that cripples your OS.
"It's not my job to seek the truth.
It's not my job to pick a side.
It's not my job to judge your sins.
It's my job to save your life."
-Champion Motto

Game Master for Beacon of Hope. The one and only superhero RP! Join here!
Not A Furry

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Not A Furry »

I put thermal paste under your processor and insert it back the wrong way so that some of the pins break, then proceed to replace a capacitor on your power supply with a mislabeled and incredibly small 10 farad one without telling you, then ask you to look up something for me on the internet.
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CyberDragon
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Re: Attack the above poster

Post by CyberDragon »

I laugh at you for thinking I'm still only stored in one computer after all the attacks on my house (read server). I then reach out and pull you into cyberspace, modify your mesh (read body) replacing it with a teapot mesh, and then put you back into the physical world a mile in the air.
"It's not my job to seek the truth.
It's not my job to pick a side.
It's not my job to judge your sins.
It's my job to save your life."
-Champion Motto

Game Master for Beacon of Hope. The one and only superhero RP! Join here!
User avatar
Buster
Game Master
Posts: 5379
Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2015 9:26 pm
Location: Σ Disturbing Exploding Face

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Buster »

I EMP every computer in the local galactic cluster save for the old 286 i stuffed you into earlier.
Most important thing I've learned from D&D?
No matter how tempting it may be, as a DM I can't both present a problem and solve it.
Every time a DMPC or NPC fixes something a payer couldn't i'm diminishing and undermining that player's contribution.
FancyHat
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Joined: Fri May 13, 2016 5:15 pm
Location: Somewhere in the Southern US...Would prefer Scotland.

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by FancyHat »

I get you arrested by the police because of looking like a certain other purple humanoid. As the cops drag you away, I giggle fiendishly as I count the money I have gotten from the bounty.
"Crimes?" "Crimes."
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CyberDragon
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Joined: Wed Feb 01, 2017 12:41 am
Location: The Depths of Cyberspace

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by CyberDragon »

I steal your fancy hat.
"It's not my job to seek the truth.
It's not my job to pick a side.
It's not my job to judge your sins.
It's my job to save your life."
-Champion Motto

Game Master for Beacon of Hope. The one and only superhero RP! Join here!
User avatar
Buster
Game Master
Posts: 5379
Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2015 9:26 pm
Location: Σ Disturbing Exploding Face

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Buster »

I run a low-level format on all memory and storage within your server.
Most important thing I've learned from D&D?
No matter how tempting it may be, as a DM I can't both present a problem and solve it.
Every time a DMPC or NPC fixes something a payer couldn't i'm diminishing and undermining that player's contribution.
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CyberDragon
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Posts: 4009
Joined: Wed Feb 01, 2017 12:41 am
Location: The Depths of Cyberspace

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by CyberDragon »

I jump into the physical world so you stop messing up my servers and I slap you silly. Seriously, have you attacked me any other way?
"It's not my job to seek the truth.
It's not my job to pick a side.
It's not my job to judge your sins.
It's my job to save your life."
-Champion Motto

Game Master for Beacon of Hope. The one and only superhero RP! Join here!
Not A Furry

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Not A Furry »

I DDOS you while I enter your server room, remove every single fan and close every liquid cooling loop from your system.
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CyberDragon
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Re: Attack the above poster

Post by CyberDragon »

Being in the physical world now, that has absolutely no effect on me personally, and so I slap you too. And then hire a repair man to fix my house that people keep destroying. Thus forcing you people to be more original with your attacks, as hitting the server is no longer going to impact myself.
"It's not my job to seek the truth.
It's not my job to pick a side.
It's not my job to judge your sins.
It's my job to save your life."
-Champion Motto

Game Master for Beacon of Hope. The one and only superhero RP! Join here!
User avatar
Buster
Game Master
Posts: 5379
Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2015 9:26 pm
Location: Σ Disturbing Exploding Face

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Buster »

now that you can nolonger hide in that machine, i make a batch of dragon soup, enough for every pet on the forum.
Most important thing I've learned from D&D?
No matter how tempting it may be, as a DM I can't both present a problem and solve it.
Every time a DMPC or NPC fixes something a payer couldn't i'm diminishing and undermining that player's contribution.
User avatar
CyberDragon
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Posts: 4009
Joined: Wed Feb 01, 2017 12:41 am
Location: The Depths of Cyberspace

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by CyberDragon »

(finally something different!)

I melt your cooking supplies with fire breath, then hit you in the face with a broom.
"It's not my job to seek the truth.
It's not my job to pick a side.
It's not my job to judge your sins.
It's my job to save your life."
-Champion Motto

Game Master for Beacon of Hope. The one and only superhero RP! Join here!
FancyHat
Posts: 221
Joined: Fri May 13, 2016 5:15 pm
Location: Somewhere in the Southern US...Would prefer Scotland.

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by FancyHat »

I beat you with a cane a la Andrew Jackson style before taking out a elephant gun and blasting you with both barrels. I then get dynamite and blow you up before running you over ten times with a Sherman Firefly, then repeat said actions ten times just to be sure..

(Sane Side:Jeez a bit overkill, don't you think?
Crazy Prepared side:There is no such thing as overkill.)
"Crimes?" "Crimes."
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Buster
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Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2015 9:26 pm
Location: Σ Disturbing Exploding Face

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Buster »

I tie you up, melt your face with a blowtorch, encase you in concrete, launch your concrete prison into jupiter, detonate the 1GT nuke that was attached to the rocket, knock jupiter into the sun by launching all of the other planets in the solar system at it, chash other stars into the sun until it goes nova, and then to be extra thurough, colapse THAT into a black hole that consumes the entire universe.
Most important thing I've learned from D&D?
No matter how tempting it may be, as a DM I can't both present a problem and solve it.
Every time a DMPC or NPC fixes something a payer couldn't i'm diminishing and undermining that player's contribution.
User avatar
CyberDragon
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Posts: 4009
Joined: Wed Feb 01, 2017 12:41 am
Location: The Depths of Cyberspace

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by CyberDragon »

I hack reality and bring the universe back.

I then pick up Fancy Hat's Sherman Firefly and drop it on your head.
"It's not my job to seek the truth.
It's not my job to pick a side.
It's not my job to judge your sins.
It's my job to save your life."
-Champion Motto

Game Master for Beacon of Hope. The one and only superhero RP! Join here!
User avatar
Buster
Game Master
Posts: 5379
Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2015 9:26 pm
Location: Σ Disturbing Exploding Face

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Buster »

i strap you down, chop off your wings, and force you to heat the fryer i put them in.
Most important thing I've learned from D&D?
No matter how tempting it may be, as a DM I can't both present a problem and solve it.
Every time a DMPC or NPC fixes something a payer couldn't i'm diminishing and undermining that player's contribution.
Not A Furry

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Not A Furry »

triggered
Not a Furry alcanza a Búster a tres brazas de la mar,
alza su espada Colada, un fuerte golpe le da,
los carbunclos de su yelmo todos se los fue a arrancar,
luego el yelmo y la cabeza le parte por la mitad,
hasta la misma cintura la espada fue a penetrar.

________________________________________________
Not a Furry reaches Buster three feet from the sea,
he raises his sword, a strong blow he gives,
all the carbuncles he ripped from his helm,
the head and the helm he slices in half,
all the way to the waist the sword penetrates


Did my best to make it rhyme, english sucks. This is from Cantar del Mio Cid
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HellishK9
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Re: Attack the above poster

Post by HellishK9 »

I tell a cat lover that you have similar interests. Now he/she won't stop bugging you.
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D-Rock
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Re: Attack the above poster

Post by D-Rock »

I take colorful chalk to your face. I'll make you the happiest drawing yet!
Faith doesn't change circumstances. Faith changes me.
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Saturn381
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Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Saturn381 »

I send you to escalator land.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ShGRWM9dNy8
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Buster
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Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Buster »

I take grape away from you.
Most important thing I've learned from D&D?
No matter how tempting it may be, as a DM I can't both present a problem and solve it.
Every time a DMPC or NPC fixes something a payer couldn't i'm diminishing and undermining that player's contribution.
User avatar
CyberDragon
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Posts: 4009
Joined: Wed Feb 01, 2017 12:41 am
Location: The Depths of Cyberspace

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by CyberDragon »

I take grape back away from you and give her back to Saturn381
"It's not my job to seek the truth.
It's not my job to pick a side.
It's not my job to judge your sins.
It's my job to save your life."
-Champion Motto

Game Master for Beacon of Hope. The one and only superhero RP! Join here!
User avatar
HellishK9
Posts: 453
Joined: Mon Jan 25, 2016 5:45 pm
Location: Peeking In Your Window

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by HellishK9 »

*Throws bread at dragon*
Toast please!
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Not A Furry

Re: Attack the above poster

Post by Not A Furry »

Wow man that was too much, I mean, we've tortured people in this thread in horribly imaginative ways but that? Beelzebub himself will have to make an entire new circle of hell just for you.
I let you look at yourself in the mirror, since I can't think of a worse punishment for you than making you acknowledge your crime.

-Edit: Originally replied to that Buster monster, I kick hellish in the butt
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