chuck noris can LICK HIS ELBOW. 0.0

Isn't that technically possible?

fine. chuck noris can lick your elbow in new york while your in california.

it is possible

- Jesus walks on water. Chuck Norris walks on Jesus.
- The reason babies cry when they're born is because they're now in a world where Chuck Norris exist.
- Chuck Norris doesn't sleep, he waits.

Chuck Norris can speak Braile

In America: Chuck Norris kills you
In Soviet Russia: Chuck Norris kills you

Chuck Norris makes his enemies disappear without even looking

you mean "chuck norris dosent bother lookng at people cause he knows he already made them disapear"

Chuck Norris was once in a knife fight. The knife lost.

Chuck Norris shaves with a toothpick

._.

i dont get it.

Too far.

no its not.

These facts are probably only funny if you're an Orioles fan (some of them work if you're just a baseball fan), but if you are, tons of them are hilarious*.

*even to people like me who don't really follow baseball closely.

Chuck Norris is the funniest man alive. When he tells a joke, you laugh. YOU LAUGH

When Chuck Norris says hi, YOU BOW DOWN TO HIM. Even if he's 500 miles away from you, YOU WILL BOW DOWN TO HIM.

If you type "Chuck Norris" into Google, but hit "I'm feeling lucky" instead of "Search", it takes you to a page of Chuck Norris jokes.

True story. :3

If you type in "find chuck norris" and hit I'm feelin lucky it will tell you the rest of the joke cuz I can't remember.

Chuck Norris is so powerful, not even a blendtec blender can destroy his action figure.

You can't run away from chuck norris!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dIgey9NLdhk&feature=related

Chuck Norris doesn't get frostbite. He bites frost.

Chuck NorrisMatt Weiters likes to involve the team, so he once hit a 25 run homer.

There are 1424 things in an average room with Chuck Norris could kill you. Including the room itself.
The Chuck is a measure of the international system of pain.
Chuck Norris once bet something with Superman. The loser had to wear underpants on the outside the rest of his life.
Chuck Norris knows the last digit of Pi.
Chuck Norris can breathe underwater...and under fire.
Chuck Norris can burn an ant with a magnifying glass...at night.

Chuck Norris created the big bang when he kicked a marble by accident.

Chuck Norris is a very talented martial artist who helped popularize them in the West.

Chuck Norris runs so fast that he can bump into himself.Saxton Hale can do that too, but he's not that muffins and cookies stupid!

I'm usually not a fan of something as clichéd as Chuck Norris facts, but I heard a good one recently.

In America, you run from Chuck Norris. In Soviet Russia... You run from Chuck Norris.

Well then that post provided as much new content to this thread as yours did.

...And this one, I guess.

Here, Chuck Norris tracks you down. IRL, Chuck Norris is already behind you.



Just saying...

This version is better because it can be followed up with "although in reality it doesn't matter, because you can't run from Chuck Norris."

I remember when there were just Vin Diesel facts. Then Chuck Norris came around and it took off.

Who is this Vin Diesel man you speak of?