Housepets!

The story so far... wrote:There was a farmer who had a dog named Bingo. Bingo was his name. His name was Bingo. He was very lonely because he killed his friends because they wouldn't let him play with his favorite cat, named Whiskers. Whiskers was just minding his own business when a dog named Bingo (a different one) asked Whiskers if he wanted to get chewed up. Whiskers said no, but got chewed anyway because Bingo was jealous of Bingo and Bingo owed Bingo money, which seems absurd, but they both apparently use money for dog biscuits and large bowls which they fill with lots of baked bean juice. So they went to the store to buy more candy for the party later tonight.

They had no cream cheese crackers, so they needed cream cheese crackers in order to eat later on. Bingo asked Bingo if Bingo had any idea how to build a house out of cream cheese crackers. Bingo said that it was getting too late to build a house. Then he said "We can build a Victorian bathtub out of pudding." Right then, someone got Whiskers to not be dead via necromantic rituals and also Sam was there, so he helped out. I'm not sure what Sam exactly thought of everything, because he was dead and all. Sam lived a life of crime, which resulted in motorcycle cops everywhere. The motorcycle cops were quite enthusiastic with Sam's ability to be dead. Sam was dead and they all mourned his death, except for one, but he was not a real being, but an imaginary being who planned to eat everyone at the party later tonight. His name was Steve and he had a problem because I'm Steve.

Steve and Steve were going to build a cake out of pies made from cookies with cupcakes baked on top of a pot roast, till Steve realized that it tasted like garbage. Then, Bingo got confused and decided to bite Steve hard and then to run away from the bitten Steve. He ran to the gas station so he could buy some gasoline. Now that he bought the gas, he drove to the party that was at the beach near the abandoned syringe factor where he would eat all the food that was delivered there from Joe's Food Delivery. He knew not that Joe was actually the president of the largest doughnut factory in Principality of Sealand.

At the party, Bingo and Bingo met the Steves from the coast and told them they were out of cream cheese and baked potatoes and tiny umbrellas, which ruined everything. Therefore, the party was totally lame, so the Bingos decided to go to the store to buy fish in memory of their dead homies, who were cats that wore hats. Thus, the tradition started by Steve was not relevant. Then Mary arrived and she was completely ignorant about...she was unable to knit sweaters because she was a yarn kleptomaniac and that’s terrible because she really hates yarn. It makes her itchy. But Mary tried to steal all of the needles to prevent Steve and that’s scary. Scarier than scurvy. Steve has scurvy and no limes because the limes belong to the scientist. They needed to see why Steve hated limes because they wanted to find out where Steve hid the Easter eggs. Easter eggs are extremely important in the month of the Vernal Equinox because of all the bunnies running into the walls. It was chaos that was contained only by the willpower of the chipmunk army of the west side and honorable and slightly wise but never punctual brethren of the great Tapir god, Cousin of Zoltar, Prince of Pain, was named Tom the unforgiving. Chaos ensued when Tom tried to open the box of chocolates given to him by the queen of the Steves and Bingos. Oh unpleasant was the party she hosted unbeknownst to people from farms in the valley next to the land mine field that was inactive, and an orchard filled with fruit of the devil that was blessed with the spit of a hamster. She was infuriated with Tom because he wouldn’t give her a fancy gorilla costume for the Halloween party. Tom didn’t even know there was anything wrong with rotisserie chicken soups because they tasted great like diabetes. All of a sudden Tom began to dance in the vampire bund when someone said “Why must the sun come up in times of our great fun?” Then Tom proclaimed “I have no brains. I am smarter than you however now dead.” Bingo began hallucinating about the potato with the five of hearts that gunned down the Queen of Spades who loved the girl that was actually a mountain inside of a miniature schnauzer puppy. One of the problems with this was that it was illegal in Bingo’s owner’s farm to have a flashback on the back of a pirate named Captain Frostbeard the second.
Meanwhile in space there was a giant space squid named after Waldo because he was...