Game I'm working on - Playable Alpha coming Soon!

Discuss everything else here

Moderator: ArcWolf

RockstarRaccoon
Worst Mod EVER!
Posts: 4645
Joined: Sun Dec 27, 2009 5:50 pm
Location: South Florida

Game I'm working on - Playable Alpha coming Soon!

Post by RockstarRaccoon »

I'm working on a game about a raccoon, and I thought you guys might want to see some stuff for it. I made this video today of the main physics/control system, so I decided to post it here.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lSUWOy2oBf0 - Milestone 1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4V-UA8YtsYc - Milestone 1.5
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=epsyf_2PTdA - Milestone 1.75
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8a3b3cp44uM - Milestone 2.0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GCu38S48vpY - Milestone 3.0 (latest)

Edit: Just so it is understood, I am constantly improving this and making new videos.
Last edited by RockstarRaccoon on Mon Feb 25, 2013 6:54 am, edited 6 times in total.
Hey guys, I'm one of the RP section mods. Feel free to bug me any time: I'm not strict and I try to be very approachable.
Image
Fanfiction Character: Vallerie Nightengale (female, idiot)
User avatar
Teh Brawler
Posts: 5133
Joined: Fri Aug 14, 2009 1:26 pm
Location: Someplace with Internet access
Contact:

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by Teh Brawler »

It's amazing how many computer programmers and developers we have on this forum. :P
That being said, this is a really great start you have. I'm looking forward to seeing it completed. It kind of looks like Sonic the hedgehog, but more complex. Is this a self-published program of yours?
DOH HO HO WELL THEN
User avatar
FlintTheSquirrel
Posts: 2374
Joined: Sat Mar 27, 2010 6:30 pm
Location: Sweden/North Carolina

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by FlintTheSquirrel »

I have no idea how things like that are made, but I though acceleration and things of that caliber was the hard part, and that making the sprite was one of the easier ones.
Good job on what you have so far, hope you make an update on it soon.
User avatar
bixlow
Posts: 390
Joined: Mon Apr 19, 2010 8:26 pm

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by bixlow »

My brother works for Lantana games,
once you finish, I'll ask him to check your game out
... biscuit?...really?
Monty: S-7/P- 4/E-6/C-7/I-4/A-5/L-9/
User avatar
44R0NM10
Former Mod of the Aura
Posts: 4011
Joined: Mon Mar 29, 2010 5:52 pm
Location: England
Contact:

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by 44R0NM10 »

I remember trying to make a game on a program called 'Game Maker 6.1'. Never finished it, was too complicated. So, yeah, this game looks quite awesome!
User avatar
GameCobra
Posts: 7243
Joined: Wed Apr 08, 2009 1:27 am
Location: Cape Breton, Nova Scotia

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by GameCobra »

It's funny how i could've one day been alogn with all said programmers.

Then i found out the joys of writing :D :roll:
3 words - Liquid Metal Fur
Image
ReCreate
Posts: 1415
Joined: Sun Mar 28, 2010 6:09 pm
Location: http://bordomirc.co.cc
Contact:

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by ReCreate »

44R0NM10 wrote:I remember trying to make a game on a program called 'Game Maker 6.1'. Never finished it, was too complicated. So, yeah, this game looks quite awesome!
Version 6.1 is quite old and outdated(not to mention becoming unsupported at the forums!). The latest(8.0) should be used instead.

Anyways, the game looks interesting. Good luck!
Don't let others define you, Only you can determine your fate
no longer active, sorry
RockstarRaccoon
Worst Mod EVER!
Posts: 4645
Joined: Sun Dec 27, 2009 5:50 pm
Location: South Florida

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by RockstarRaccoon »

Hey, thanks for the feedback guys! Working on the game even further right now, there should be a playable tech-demo in a few weeks.
Teh Brawler wrote:It's amazing how many computer programmers and developers we have on this forum. :P
We like teh internet.
Teh Brawler wrote:It kind of looks like Sonic the hedgehog, but more complex. Is this a self-published program of yours?
The initial design concept was based on Sonic Adventure, one of my favorite games. It is indeed self published.
FlintTheSquirrel wrote:I have no idea how things like that are made, but I though acceleration and things of that caliber was the hard part, and that making the sprite was one of the easier ones.
Well, the sprite requires me to work with file formats and all that, and I don't feel like going into that yet, so I'm only looking at the base engine right now and using bitmaps.
bixlow wrote:My brother works for Lantana games, once you finish, I'll ask him to check your game out
Eh, thanks, but I'm not interested in leaving the company that releases my albums to work for someone else at this time.
44R0NM10 wrote:I remember trying to make a game on a program called 'Game Maker 6.1'. Never finished it, was too complicated. So, yeah, this game looks quite awesome!
Wow, I hate programs like that. Once you know how to program in Java or C++, they are just a nuisance.
GameCobra wrote:It's funny how i could've one day been alogn with all said programmers.
Then i found out the joys of writing :D :roll:
Game Development is the intersection of these though!
Hey guys, I'm one of the RP section mods. Feel free to bug me any time: I'm not strict and I try to be very approachable.
Image
Fanfiction Character: Vallerie Nightengale (female, idiot)
ReCreate
Posts: 1415
Joined: Sun Mar 28, 2010 6:09 pm
Location: http://bordomirc.co.cc
Contact:

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by ReCreate »

Wow, I hate programs like that. Once you know how to program in Java or C++, they are just a nuisance.
Have you ever tried it before? It's pretty much an IDE with a built in programming langauge.(with c syntax) Not to mention: C++ or java are much more tedious to use. You have to do everything manually, etc. Though, once that's done it's likely worth it.
Don't let others define you, Only you can determine your fate
no longer active, sorry
User avatar
Typhon
Posts: 1008
Joined: Sat May 08, 2010 1:16 am
Location: In my house. Reading housepets. And organic chemistry.

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by Typhon »

maybe the box has little feet like a caterpillar? suction cups? lol jk. Have you guys ever tried to program a robot in C? first time i tried i felt like stabbing my eyes out..
ReCreate
Posts: 1415
Joined: Sun Mar 28, 2010 6:09 pm
Location: http://bordomirc.co.cc
Contact:

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by ReCreate »

My robot actually did stab my eyes out. D:
Don't let others define you, Only you can determine your fate
no longer active, sorry
RockstarRaccoon
Worst Mod EVER!
Posts: 4645
Joined: Sun Dec 27, 2009 5:50 pm
Location: South Florida

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by RockstarRaccoon »

Typhon wrote:maybe the box has little feet like a caterpillar? suction cups? lol jk. Have you guys ever tried to program a robot in C?
Yes, that was one of the things my programming teacher pulled out for us when he got bored when I was getting my tech-degree in programming. I don't think it was that hard...
Hey guys, I'm one of the RP section mods. Feel free to bug me any time: I'm not strict and I try to be very approachable.
Image
Fanfiction Character: Vallerie Nightengale (female, idiot)
User avatar
Flamboyant-Pencil
Posts: 437
Joined: Sat May 02, 2009 4:37 pm
Location: USA
Contact:

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by Flamboyant-Pencil »

Nice job! Wouldn't quit from frustration far before that point.
deviantART! 8D

AWESOME AS CHARGED
RockstarRaccoon
Worst Mod EVER!
Posts: 4645
Joined: Sun Dec 27, 2009 5:50 pm
Location: South Florida

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by RockstarRaccoon »

Flamboyant-Pencil wrote:Nice job! Wouldn't quit from frustration far before that point.
The problem's never been frustration, just trouble finding the time...
Hey guys, I'm one of the RP section mods. Feel free to bug me any time: I'm not strict and I try to be very approachable.
Image
Fanfiction Character: Vallerie Nightengale (female, idiot)
RockstarRaccoon
Worst Mod EVER!
Posts: 4645
Joined: Sun Dec 27, 2009 5:50 pm
Location: South Florida

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by RockstarRaccoon »

So, I'm almost at the point where I'm going to make another video of the game. I was curious if anyone knew where I might find help with some sprites, as it's a bit difficult to draw them all on my own. I'm trying to get someone I know who wants to learn how to make professional games like this to help me with maps too.
Hey guys, I'm one of the RP section mods. Feel free to bug me any time: I'm not strict and I try to be very approachable.
Image
Fanfiction Character: Vallerie Nightengale (female, idiot)
Buckdida
Juicy Wolf-Cat
Posts: 2350
Joined: Wed Mar 04, 2009 1:59 am
Location: Richardson Valley

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by Buckdida »

Uuhhh...

I have some basic Hammer experience...you know, the Valve map editor...durrrr...probably not helpful here.

As for sprites, browse around on DA. There's a ton of sprite artists; maybe one will take requests?
Retired RP Character List (Sorry guys)
Richardson Valley: Venison and Ochen
Brookshire Meadows: Trinket
Oasis Towers: Jaxeh and Klack
User avatar
Typhon
Posts: 1008
Joined: Sat May 08, 2010 1:16 am
Location: In my house. Reading housepets. And organic chemistry.

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by Typhon »

Buckdida wrote:Uuhhh...

I have some basic Hammer experience...you know, the Valve map editor...durrrr...probably not helpful here.

As for sprites, browse around on DA. There's a ton of sprite artists; maybe one will take requests?
Unless he's making a source mod (that would be wicked sweet!) i don't think hammer would be of any use :( rpg housepets game anyone?
RockstarRaccoon
Worst Mod EVER!
Posts: 4645
Joined: Sun Dec 27, 2009 5:50 pm
Location: South Florida

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by RockstarRaccoon »

At the time I am posting this, this is not finished uploading, but this is the game so far. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4V-UA8YtsYc I think it's funny that most of the changes from the previous version that I don't mention are not obvious from the video.
Buckdida wrote:I have some basic Hammer experience...you know, the Valve map editor...durrrr...probably not helpful here.
As for sprites, browse around on DA. There's a ton of sprite artists; maybe one will take requests?
Yeah, these are image based. Like I said: I already have someone I'm trying to get on with this, so it's no big deal. I should look into the DA thing though...

Edit: Ok, it's up. Go look.
Hey guys, I'm one of the RP section mods. Feel free to bug me any time: I'm not strict and I try to be very approachable.
Image
Fanfiction Character: Vallerie Nightengale (female, idiot)
User avatar
FlintTheSquirrel
Posts: 2374
Joined: Sat Mar 27, 2010 6:30 pm
Location: Sweden/North Carolina

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by FlintTheSquirrel »

I did not notice the acceleration and deceleration thing going on this time, but other then that, it seems you are making some progress with the sprites on the game. I wonder what you will use for enemies and traps for Marco.
Dr. Prower
Posts: 1446
Joined: Fri May 21, 2010 10:29 pm
Location: Here, Back and Better Than Ever!
Contact:

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by Dr. Prower »

So...your game is about a moving box? Lol. I wonder if Snake's hiding under it.
I ship Grape&Peanut and support King&Bailey
Image
RockstarRaccoon
Worst Mod EVER!
Posts: 4645
Joined: Sun Dec 27, 2009 5:50 pm
Location: South Florida

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by RockstarRaccoon »

Dr. Prower wrote:So...your game is about a moving box? Lol. I wonder if Snake's hiding under it.
Watch the new video.
Hey guys, I'm one of the RP section mods. Feel free to bug me any time: I'm not strict and I try to be very approachable.
Image
Fanfiction Character: Vallerie Nightengale (female, idiot)
RockstarRaccoon
Worst Mod EVER!
Posts: 4645
Joined: Sun Dec 27, 2009 5:50 pm
Location: South Florida

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by RockstarRaccoon »

FlintTheSquirrel wrote:I did not notice the acceleration and deceleration thing going on this time, but other then that, it seems you are making some progress with the sprites on the game. I wonder what you will use for enemies and traps for Marco.
Oh, lots of interesting concepts right now. I have enemies which can dig, just like he can (you even have to fight a giant mole-demon to get the digging ability), I also have enemies which can fly freely and throw fireballs at him (that's another boss). I have concepts I'm working on for traps, most natural hazards, and some which were actively set for him. I also have stuff like simple block-puzzles and switch-puzzles, which is interesting in a sidescroller.

My Typical enemies right now are things like Undead animals (slow and strong), Rabid animals (weak and fast), and the occasional demonic animal (even stronger). And to attack he has to slash them with nothing but his claws (until he gets a sword, then it's easier, except for the fact that harder enemies show up).

Edit: enemies are one of the next things I'm going to program.

ALSO: 32nd post!! ^!^
Hey guys, I'm one of the RP section mods. Feel free to bug me any time: I'm not strict and I try to be very approachable.
Image
Fanfiction Character: Vallerie Nightengale (female, idiot)
Atari
Posts: 118
Joined: Wed May 26, 2010 6:18 pm

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by Atari »

Almost reminds me of the old SNES or Genisis platformer games [although that's what platformer usually is like, right? :lol: ]. Is this going to be multi-platform? [I think you're using C?]
RockstarRaccoon
Worst Mod EVER!
Posts: 4645
Joined: Sun Dec 27, 2009 5:50 pm
Location: South Florida

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by RockstarRaccoon »

Atari wrote:Almost reminds me of the old SNES or Genisis platformer games [although that's what platformer usually is like, right? :lol: ]. Is this going to be multi-platform? [I think you're using C?]
YES. My main influence for this game was actually Sonic 3 and Sonic Adventure, and I'm taking alot of hints from Super Metroid, which is a similar game. I'm trying to make a 32-bit equivilant of the awesome sidescrollers that came out of the16bit. Nice catch there.
I am indeed using C++, making API calls through the SDL library, so yes, it will indeed be on Mac, Linux, and Windows, and may eventually be ported to other SDL-Compatible systems for those who are into that.
Hey guys, I'm one of the RP section mods. Feel free to bug me any time: I'm not strict and I try to be very approachable.
Image
Fanfiction Character: Vallerie Nightengale (female, idiot)
User avatar
Typhon
Posts: 1008
Joined: Sat May 08, 2010 1:16 am
Location: In my house. Reading housepets. And organic chemistry.

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by Typhon »

RockstarRaccoon wrote:
Typhon wrote:maybe the box has little feet like a caterpillar? suction cups? lol jk. Have you guys ever tried to program a robot in C?
Yes, that was one of the things my programming teacher pulled out for us when he got bored when I was getting my tech-degree in programming. I don't think it was that hard...
When your under pressure at a competition its hard to focus on making your robot do exactly what you want in autonomous mode.
RockstarRaccoon
Worst Mod EVER!
Posts: 4645
Joined: Sun Dec 27, 2009 5:50 pm
Location: South Florida

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by RockstarRaccoon »

Typhon wrote:
RockstarRaccoon wrote:
Typhon wrote:maybe the box has little feet like a caterpillar? suction cups? lol jk. Have you guys ever tried to program a robot in C?
Yes, that was one of the things my programming teacher pulled out for us when he got bored when I was getting my tech-degree in programming. I don't think it was that hard...
When your under pressure at a competition its hard to focus on making your robot do exactly what you want in autonomous mode.
Oh, that's different. We couldn't actually get it to work autonomously: the hardware he gave us wasn't reliable with movement.
Hey guys, I'm one of the RP section mods. Feel free to bug me any time: I'm not strict and I try to be very approachable.
Image
Fanfiction Character: Vallerie Nightengale (female, idiot)
User avatar
Teh Brawler
Posts: 5133
Joined: Fri Aug 14, 2009 1:26 pm
Location: Someplace with Internet access
Contact:

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by Teh Brawler »

You're gonna need people to beta test it, right? RIGHT? :shock:
DOH HO HO WELL THEN
RockstarRaccoon
Worst Mod EVER!
Posts: 4645
Joined: Sun Dec 27, 2009 5:50 pm
Location: South Florida

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by RockstarRaccoon »

Teh Brawler wrote:You're gonna need people to beta test it, right? RIGHT? :shock:
Yeah, like I said, I'll have a playable demo out soon.
Edit: Mac Users with SDL and XCode will get to play first.
Hey guys, I'm one of the RP section mods. Feel free to bug me any time: I'm not strict and I try to be very approachable.
Image
Fanfiction Character: Vallerie Nightengale (female, idiot)
User avatar
Typhon
Posts: 1008
Joined: Sat May 08, 2010 1:16 am
Location: In my house. Reading housepets. And organic chemistry.

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by Typhon »

RockstarRaccoon wrote:
Teh Brawler wrote:You're gonna need people to beta test it, right? RIGHT? :shock:
Yeah, like I said, I'll have a playable demo out soon.
Edit: Mac Users with SDL and XCode will get to play first.
Apple fanboy X[ lol jk
RockstarRaccoon
Worst Mod EVER!
Posts: 4645
Joined: Sun Dec 27, 2009 5:50 pm
Location: South Florida

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by RockstarRaccoon »

Typhon wrote:
RockstarRaccoon wrote:
Teh Brawler wrote:You're gonna need people to beta test it, right? RIGHT? :shock:
Yeah, like I said, I'll have a playable demo out soon.
Edit: Mac Users with SDL and XCode will get to play first.
Apple fanboy X[ lol jk
Well, that's what I use. I'm not going to port it to other systems until it's more than just a player sprite running around...
Hey guys, I'm one of the RP section mods. Feel free to bug me any time: I'm not strict and I try to be very approachable.
Image
Fanfiction Character: Vallerie Nightengale (female, idiot)
User avatar
Teh Brawler
Posts: 5133
Joined: Fri Aug 14, 2009 1:26 pm
Location: Someplace with Internet access
Contact:

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by Teh Brawler »

RockstarRaccoon wrote:Well, that's what I use. I'm not going to port it to other systems until it's more than just a player sprite running around...
But I'm a PC >_<
DOH HO HO WELL THEN
Atari
Posts: 118
Joined: Wed May 26, 2010 6:18 pm

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by Atari »

RockstarRaccoon wrote:Well, that's what I use. I'm not going to port it to other systems until it's more than just a player sprite running around...
So the first beta is just gonna be a "playable" version of your demo?
RockstarRaccoon
Worst Mod EVER!
Posts: 4645
Joined: Sun Dec 27, 2009 5:50 pm
Location: South Florida

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by RockstarRaccoon »

Teh Brawler wrote:
RockstarRaccoon wrote:Well, that's what I use. I'm not going to port it to other systems until it's more than just a player sprite running around...
But I'm a PC >_<
Oh, don't worry, a Linux port shouldn't be far behind the Mac one, as the system also has straightforward API, so it will be playable on a PC.
Atari wrote:
RockstarRaccoon wrote:Well, that's what I use. I'm not going to port it to other systems until it's more than just a player sprite running around...
So the first beta is just gonna be a "playable" version of your demo?
Not the demo as in the video I made, but my first playable release will be a short game which will cover the first 3 bosses and stop there. I'll let people Beta-test that. I'll port it once the initial bugs are worked out, that way I've got most of the problems worked out by the time I'm trying to rewrite sections for the poorly-made API of windows.
Hey guys, I'm one of the RP section mods. Feel free to bug me any time: I'm not strict and I try to be very approachable.
Image
Fanfiction Character: Vallerie Nightengale (female, idiot)
RockstarRaccoon
Worst Mod EVER!
Posts: 4645
Joined: Sun Dec 27, 2009 5:50 pm
Location: South Florida

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by RockstarRaccoon »

So, I have a bit of script that I've been showing around, and I was wondering if anyone would give me some feedback on this. It's going to be a little weird to read, since it's a video-game, but it's mainly dialogue, so...
This is the first couple minutes of the game, enjoy.
Marco: *awakens as a beam of sunlight hits his face, blinks, yawns* "Why hello there evening sun."
*gets up and stretches, walks to his front door, then is surprised just before Anton slam-tackles him.*
Anton: *blinks down* "You took too long to get up!"
Marco: "Oh that's right, we were going to the pond today."
Anton: "Yeah, Spike's already there by now." *gets off* "Come on!" *walks out*

[Give PL control]
Interface: "Use the Left and Right Arrow keys to move"

[PL can walk out the door to the right, that's about it]
Anton: *Right of the base of the tree* "Come on, we've waited all day for you to get up." *exit right*
Marco: "Hey, nocturnal animals have a right to sleep all day."

[The path to the left is blocked by a wall which requires tunneling or gliding, so they must follow Anton Right, to the next area, which is perpendicular. If they try to go more than a few steps Left here, Marco stops and says "the pond is the other way", turning around.]

[Marco quickly hits a step which he cannot simply walk up, forcing the player to jump.]
Interface: "Hold 'A' Button to jump."

[Marco soon hits a barrier of wood, where Shadow the Fox stands grinning, next to an unamused Anton]
Shadow: "Hey there Marco. Your friend here can't get past this barrier I set up, and I bet you can't either. I think you should pay a toll if you want to pass."
Marco: "Buzz off! I ain't payin' you nothing. I'll bet I can smash that barricade with one paw."
Shadow: "Oh really? I'd like to see you try."
[At this point, the player is forced to hit the barrier.]
Interface: "Press 'B' to attack objects like the barrier."
[Marco can, of course, easily smash the barrier in one shot]
Shadow: *pouty* "Bah! It looks like you win this time." *walks off left*
Anton: "I figured you could break it. You and spike are alot stronger than me."
Marco: "Maybe you should eat more vegetables. I heart 5 a day is the healthy way. Don't ask me what it's the 'way' for though."
Anton: "Eh... Eating healthy sounds iffy, and boring at that. I'd rathar eat cake all day."
Marco: "That's probably a good idea, you should do that."
Anton: "I should. But anyway, Spike is probably waiting. Let's get going." *exits right again*

[Marco continues until he hits a turn in the path]
Marco: "I should turn here"
Interface: "Press 'C' to perform actions and go down side-paths."
[Marco has to turn the corner to continue. He'll turn back again if the Pl goes further. When he does he'll hit a wall next to a tree]

Marco: "I've never understood why anyone would build a wall here. I'll just climb the tree to get around it."
Interface: "Press the Up arrow next to a tree to climb it."
[Marco can climb the tree and cross a bridge woven out of branches to go over the wall, which is on an edge of the pond. This makes him come at it from the Left, good because of the next little section.]

Marco: *walks toward the pond from the left*
???: *Rustles the bushes*
Marco: "??? ... !"
[a badger jumps out of the bushes and tackles Marco, causing him to fall off a cliff toward the shore.]
[This cues a relatively easy fight with the badger, who takes 2 hits and is more interested in moving around and blocking than making 1/2 HP hits. When Marco wins, continue.]

Marco and Spike: *Stare violently at each other for a second, panting a bit, then start laughing*
Spike: "Heh, you've gotten better!"
Marco: "So have you old friend."
// V This is awkward. Do they need to know he's a shaman's apprentice yet?
Spike: "Still bad about sleeping in though, how are you going to be the shaman of the entire forest if you can't get out of bed?"
Marco: "Hey, I'm allowed to keep office hours!"
*all laugh*
Marco: "So, let's see if we can find some Crawdads..."
*flapping*
Anton: "Hey, what's that?"
Prof Owl: *flying down* "Marco! Marco! I bring urgent news!"
Spike: "Oh it's you. Why haven't we eaten you yet?"
Prof Owl: *annoyed* "How rude! Marco, your master, Xavious, sent me to tell you to come to his tree right now!"
Marco: "Buzz off bird-brain, it's my day off!"
Prof Owl: *Angry* "Don't talk to me that way! Back in my day, kids had respect for their elders!"
Spike: "'Respect for Elders? You're only 2 years older than us! Just because senility is setting in early for you doesn't make you an 'elder'!"
Prof Owl: *fuming* "Why I-"
Marco: "Would make a nice meal if we weren't being so nice to you."
Prof Owl: "..."
Marco: "Hurt your feelings?"
Prof Owl: "I've given you the message. I'm leaving."
Marco: "Goodbye Mr Owl."
Prof Owl: *flying away* "That's 'Professor' to you!"
Anton: "Why are you so mean to him? He taught how to read you know..."
Marco: "Because until he shows some accreditation, he's all hot air and feathers."
Spike: "Hah! So are you going to see Xavious?"
Marco: "Of course." *turns to Anton* "He taught me how to read you know. I'll start heading to the Northwestern edge of the forest right now. We'll do this another time."
Hey guys, I'm one of the RP section mods. Feel free to bug me any time: I'm not strict and I try to be very approachable.
Image
Fanfiction Character: Vallerie Nightengale (female, idiot)
User avatar
Teh Brawler
Posts: 5133
Joined: Fri Aug 14, 2009 1:26 pm
Location: Someplace with Internet access
Contact:

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by Teh Brawler »

RockstarRaccoon wrote:So, I have a bit of script that I've been showing around, and I was wondering if anyone would give me some feedback on this. It's going to be a little weird to read, since it's a video-game, but it's mainly dialogue, so...
This is the first couple minutes of the game, enjoy.
Marco: *awakens as a beam of sunlight hits his face, blinks, yawns* "Why hello there evening sun."
*gets up and stretches, walks to his front door, then is surprised just before Anton slam-tackles him.*
Anton: *blinks down* "You took too long to get up!"
Marco: "Oh that's right, we were going to the pond today."
Anton: "Yeah, Spike's already there by now." *gets off* "Come on!" *walks out*

[Give PL control]
Interface: "Use the Left and Right Arrow keys to move"

[PL can walk out the door to the right, that's about it]
Anton: *Right of the base of the tree* "Come on, we've waited all day for you to get up." *exit right*
Marco: "Hey, nocturnal animals have a right to sleep all day."

[The path to the left is blocked by a wall which requires tunneling or gliding, so they must follow Anton Right, to the next area, which is perpendicular. If they try to go more than a few steps Left here, Marco stops and says "the pond is the other way", turning around.]

[Marco quickly hits a step which he cannot simply walk up, forcing the player to jump.]
Interface: "Hold 'A' Button to jump."

[Marco soon hits a barrier of wood, where Shadow the Fox stands grinning, next to an unamused Anton]
Shadow: "Hey there Marco. Your friend here can't get past this barrier I set up, and I bet you can't either. I think you should pay a toll if you want to pass."
Marco: "Buzz off! I ain't payin' you nothing. I'll bet I can smash that barricade with one paw."
Shadow: "Oh really? I'd like to see you try."
[At this point, the player is forced to hit the barrier.]
Interface: "Press 'B' to attack objects like the barrier."
[Marco can, of course, easily smash the barrier in one shot]
Shadow: *pouty* "Bah! It looks like you win this time." *walks off left*
Anton: "I figured you could break it. You and spike are alot stronger than me."
Marco: "Maybe you should eat more vegetables. I heart 5 a day is the healthy way. Don't ask me what it's the 'way' for though."
Anton: "Eh... Eating healthy sounds iffy, and boring at that. I'd rathar eat cake all day."
Marco: "That's probably a good idea, you should do that."
Anton: "I should. But anyway, Spike is probably waiting. Let's get going." *exits right again*

[Marco continues until he hits a turn in the path]
Marco: "I should turn here"
Interface: "Press 'C' to perform actions and go down side-paths."
[Marco has to turn the corner to continue. He'll turn back again if the Pl goes further. When he does he'll hit a wall next to a tree]

Marco: "I've never understood why anyone would build a wall here. I'll just climb the tree to get around it."
Interface: "Press the Up arrow next to a tree to climb it."
[Marco can climb the tree and cross a bridge woven out of branches to go over the wall, which is on an edge of the pond. This makes him come at it from the Left, good because of the next little section.]

Marco: *walks toward the pond from the left*
???: *Rustles the bushes*
Marco: "??? ... !"
[a badger jumps out of the bushes and tackles Marco, causing him to fall off a cliff toward the shore.]
[This cues a relatively easy fight with the badger, who takes 2 hits and is more interested in moving around and blocking than making 1/2 HP hits. When Marco wins, continue.]

Marco and Spike: *Stare violently at each other for a second, panting a bit, then start laughing*
Spike: "Heh, you've gotten better!"
Marco: "So have you old friend."
// V This is awkward. Do they need to know he's a shaman's apprentice yet?
Spike: "Still bad about sleeping in though, how are you going to be the shaman of the entire forest if you can't get out of bed?"
Marco: "Hey, I'm allowed to keep office hours!"
*all laugh*
Marco: "So, let's see if we can find some Crawdads..."
*flapping*
Anton: "Hey, what's that?"
Prof Owl: *flying down* "Marco! Marco! I bring urgent news!"
Spike: "Oh it's you. Why haven't we eaten you yet?"
Prof Owl: *annoyed* "How rude! Marco, your master, Xavious, sent me to tell you to come to his tree right now!"
Marco: "Buzz off bird-brain, it's my day off!"
Prof Owl: *Angry* "Don't talk to me that way! Back in my day, kids had respect for their elders!"
Spike: "'Respect for Elders? You're only 2 years older than us! Just because senility is setting in early for you doesn't make you an 'elder'!"
Prof Owl: *fuming* "Why I-"
Marco: "Would make a nice meal if we weren't being so nice to you."
Prof Owl: "..."
Marco: "Hurt your feelings?"
Prof Owl: "I've given you the message. I'm leaving."
Marco: "Goodbye Mr Owl."
Prof Owl: *flying away* "That's 'Professor' to you!"
Anton: "Why are you so mean to him? He taught how to read you know..."
Marco: "Because until he shows some accreditation, he's all hot air and feathers."
Spike: "Hah! So are you going to see Xavious?"
Marco: "Of course." *turns to Anton* "He taught me how to read you know. I'll start heading to the Northwestern edge of the forest right now. We'll do this another time."
Really good, it seems pretty natural. There are a few places where the conversation could flow more naturally, but overall, it's good.
DOH HO HO WELL THEN
RockstarRaccoon
Worst Mod EVER!
Posts: 4645
Joined: Sun Dec 27, 2009 5:50 pm
Location: South Florida

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by RockstarRaccoon »

Teh Brawler wrote:Really good, it seems pretty natural. There are a few places where the conversation could flow more naturally, but overall, it's good.
Yeah, I know, I'd like for someone to highlight what those sections are and give me some advice on how to fix them. That's why I posted this.

Also, realize that I have alot more than this written, I just don't post it because I don't want to give away the story before you guys get to play it.
Hey guys, I'm one of the RP section mods. Feel free to bug me any time: I'm not strict and I try to be very approachable.
Image
Fanfiction Character: Vallerie Nightengale (female, idiot)
User avatar
Teh Brawler
Posts: 5133
Joined: Fri Aug 14, 2009 1:26 pm
Location: Someplace with Internet access
Contact:

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by Teh Brawler »

Marco: *awakens as a beam of sunlight hits his face, blinks, yawns* "Why hello there evening sun."
*gets up and stretches, walks to his front door, then is surprised just before Anton slam-tackles him.*
Anton: *blinks down* "You took too long to get up!"
Marco: "Oh that's right, we were going to the pond today."
Anton: "Yeah, Spike's already there by now." *gets off* "Come on!" *walks out*


[Give PL control]
Interface: "Use the Left and Right Arrow keys to move"

[PL can walk out the door to the right, that's about it]
Anton: *Right of the base of the tree* "Come on, we've waited all day for you to get up." *exit right*
Marco: "Hey, nocturnal animals have a right to sleep all day."

[The path to the left is blocked by a wall which requires tunneling or gliding, so they must follow Anton Right, to the next area, which is perpendicular. If they try to go more than a few steps Left here, Marco stops and says "the pond is the other way", turning around.]

[Marco quickly hits a step which he cannot simply walk up, forcing the player to jump.]
Interface: "Hold 'A' Button to jump."

[Marco soon hits a barrier of wood, where Shadow the Fox stands grinning, next to an unamused Anton]
Shadow: "Hey there Marco. Your friend here can't get past this barrier I set up, and I bet you can't either. I think you should pay a toll if you want to pass."
Marco: "Buzz off! I ain't payin' you nothing. I'll bet I can smash that barricade with one paw."
Shadow: "Oh really? I'd like to see you try."
[At this point, the player is forced to hit the barrier.]
Interface: "Press 'B' to attack objects like the barrier."
[Marco can, of course, easily smash the barrier in one shot]
Shadow: *pouty* "Bah! It looks like you win this time." *walks off left*
Anton: "I figured you could break it. You and spike are alot stronger than me."
Marco: "Maybe you should eat more vegetables. I heart 5 a day is the healthy way. Don't ask me what it's the 'way' for though."
Anton: "Eh... Eating healthy sounds iffy, and boring at that. I'd rathar eat cake all day."
Marco: "That's probably a good idea, you should do that."
Anton: "I should.
But anyway, Spike is probably waiting. Let's get going." *exits right again*

[Marco continues until he hits a turn in the path]
Marco: "I should turn here"
Interface: "Press 'C' to perform actions and go down side-paths."
[Marco has to turn the corner to continue. He'll turn back again if the Pl goes further. When he does he'll hit a wall next to a tree]

Marco: "I've never understood why anyone would build a wall here. I'll just climb the tree to get around it."
Interface: "Press the Up arrow next to a tree to climb it."
[Marco can climb the tree and cross a bridge woven out of branches to go over the wall, which is on an edge of the pond. This makes him come at it from the Left, good because of the next little section.]

Marco: *walks toward the pond from the left*
???: *Rustles the bushes*
Marco: "??? ... !"
[a badger jumps out of the bushes and tackles Marco, causing him to fall off a cliff toward the shore.]
[This cues a relatively easy fight with the badger, who takes 2 hits and is more interested in moving around and blocking than making 1/2 HP hits. When Marco wins, continue.]

Marco and Spike: *Stare violently at each other for a second, panting a bit, then start laughing*
Spike: "Heh, you've gotten better!"
Marco: "So have you old friend."
// V This is awkward. Do they need to know he's a shaman's apprentice yet?
// I'd say yes. It gives depth to the plot.
Spike: "Still bad about sleeping in though, how are you going to be the shaman of the entire forest if you can't get out of bed?"
Marco: "Hey, I'm allowed to keep office hours!"
*all laugh*
Marco: "So, let's see if we can find some Crawdads..."
*flapping*
Anton: "Hey, what's that?"
Prof Owl: *flying down* "Marco! Marco! I bring urgent news!"
Spike: "Oh it's you. Why haven't we eaten you yet?"
Prof Owl: *annoyed* "How rude! Marco, your master, Xavious, sent me to tell you to come to his tree right now!"
Marco: "Buzz off bird-brain, it's my day off!"
Prof Owl: *Angry* "Don't talk to me that way! Back in my day, kids had respect for their elders!"
Spike: "'Respect for Elders? You're only 2 years older than us! Just because senility is setting in early for you doesn't make you an 'elder'!"
Prof Owl: *fuming* "Why I-"
Marco: "Would make a nice meal if we weren't being so nice to you."
Prof Owl: "..."
Marco: "Hurt your feelings?"
Prof Owl: "I've given you the message. I'm leaving."
Marco: "Goodbye Mr Owl."
Prof Owl: *flying away* "That's 'Professor' to you!"
Anton: "Why are you so mean to him? He taught how to read you know..."
Marco: "Because until he shows some accreditation, he's all hot air and feathers."
Spike: "Hah! So are you going to see Xavious?"
Marco: "Of course." *turns to Anton* "He taught me how to read you know. I'll start heading to the Northwestern edge of the forest right now. We'll do this another time."
-1st bold: A little odd in structure. It might be more natural to say something like, "Ah, good morning! Or should I say, good evening!"

-2nd bold: I'd change this up a little, to make it seem more on the spot. For example:
Anton: Hey! You overslept!
Marco: Huh? Oh right, we were going to the pond today.
Anton: Right! Spike's there already! *gets off* So, come on!

-3rd bold:
Marco: Well, maybe you should eat more vegetables. Otherwise, you'll never get as strong as us.
Anton: Eh, vegetables are boring. I'll just stick with cake.
Marco: Haha, right, you do that.
Anton: I will.
DOH HO HO WELL THEN
RockstarRaccoon
Worst Mod EVER!
Posts: 4645
Joined: Sun Dec 27, 2009 5:50 pm
Location: South Florida

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by RockstarRaccoon »

Hey guys, got back into working on this and added a new video. Go see!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=epsyf_2PTdA
Hey guys, I'm one of the RP section mods. Feel free to bug me any time: I'm not strict and I try to be very approachable.
Image
Fanfiction Character: Vallerie Nightengale (female, idiot)
User avatar
FlintTheSquirrel
Posts: 2374
Joined: Sat Mar 27, 2010 6:30 pm
Location: Sweden/North Carolina

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by FlintTheSquirrel »

Wow, the irony, I was thinking about this yesterday. The IRC brought up game designing. Ok, I will go check it now. Wow, it seems very nice, that cape ability reminds me of Flying Squirrels. 8-) And it is nice to see the small details that you add onto the game, it really helps in appreciating the work that was put in.
User avatar
sonic id furreh!!!
Posts: 1886
Joined: Tue Aug 10, 2010 7:02 am
Location: Aperture Laboratories

Re: Game I'm working on

Post by sonic id furreh!!! »

HOLY CRAP A HAD AH DREAM UV DIS!!!!! not sayin ai thot uv it ai just have dreams uv stuff that happens in de future so ai'm gettin serious de sha vu (sorry dun no how to spell it :oops: ) happens 2 meh all de taime ^.^
Post Reply