Chromium Idiot Box - Or how I learned to love the crazy

What do you call a fic that's not a fic

Moderators: Hagus, SeanWolf

Locked
User avatar
JamesTCat
Posts: 409
Joined: Fri Dec 11, 2015 11:07 am

Chromium Idiot Box - Or how I learned to love the crazy

Post by JamesTCat »

Housepets is owned by Rick Griffin. Please support the official release.

Note: this series will make you go What? Also partially started by the willy wonka reference made in "Fuzzy Lifting."
--
"Silverball Jim. Do you hear me?"

"Loud and Clear Goldie."

"Don't call me Goldie."

"Sorry. So, what's going on?"

"Some yahoo brought in a Rare Prototype gum into Babylon Gardens for the year's candy convention... But said idiot left the gum at the King Resident."

"Oh no! That's bad... Right?"

"You need to intercept this gum before it is chewed by whoever. It will cause them to-"

"Say no more. I'm on it Goldie!" "Don't call me Goldie."

Silverball Jim is trying to find the kings residence so that he can intercept the gum.

Bailey on the other hand, found the rare gum. "Gum! I guess the guest left it with us."

Meanwhile, Jim is trying to find the number for the King Residence in a payphone booth. "Let's see... Katana, Katz, no..."

Eventually, Jim found the number. The phone rings in the residence.

Just as Bailey picks up the phone, she's chewing the gum. "Hello, King residence, Bailey speaking."

"Greetings Bailey." "Oh, hey Silverball Jim."

Bailey stops to savor the flavors "Tomato soup! It's fantastic!"

"Bailey, have you seen a Yahoo who left their rare item with you?" "Oh man! Steak Dinner with the works! Just like how dad used to barbecue for me!"

"Bailey! Spit that gum out now!" Jim ordered her. "That prototype is dangerous!"

"Sorry, I have to go now! This Blueberry Pie is to die for!" "But...!" Bailey hangs up on the chrome cat.

She checks on her pups who are playing in the living room.

Just then, Bailey's nose turns blue... Her body gradually changes into a violet shade.

The pups notes their mother, who is starting to expand with juice. "Oh dear! I am swelling up like a balloon! More Like a Blueberry to be specific."

As Bailey swells up, her pups are fascinated, wondering "How is mommy turning into a blue sphere? More importantly, can we play with her?"

Eventually, Bailey is swollen up into a Blue sphere, with hands, feet, tail and head sticking out. "Do I smell Blueberries?" King asked his loving wife, only to find her swollen up into a Blueberry Husky.

"Oh, Hi Honey..." Bailey coyly replied, with her pups cuddling her. "Bailey, how did this happen?" King Asked

"The gum our guest left made me like this. Now I think I'm like this for who knows how long... Maybe for Life..."

"Don't worry about it. I will stay by your side and raise our pups with you, even if you're a blueberry!" "Thanks hon."

Later, Jim knocked on the door "Excuse me!" He knocked harder "EXCUSE ME!" King opened the door. "Yeah? We were having a little bonding time."

"Some yahoo left a dangerous prototype with you..." "I'm sorry but the ship have sailed if you are asking about that gum. Here's what's left."

What Jim is handed is a used up wad that had it's essence all chewed out by now forever-berry husky. "OH NO! ITS ABC GUM! ALREADY BEEN CHEWED!"

Later, Jim is calling the Golden Kitsune, telling her what happened
"...And all that's left of the prototype is ABC Gum! You got to do something about this!"

Kitsune facepalmed at the failure. "Sorry Jim. I could reset this but her data is already rearranged. Also, autosave was on the whole time so unless we wipe the servers clean as a reset, (Which by the way the others tell me to go jump in the lake) then Bailey is like that for her life."

"Brilliant..." Jim sarcastically replies. "At the very least, we can turn this server into something like an Idiot Box Server."

"Then go for it Goldie." And so, the Random Begins...

Cue Theme Song for this wild wide.
Last edited by JamesTCat on Sat Nov 25, 2017 9:00 am, edited 1 time in total.
Challenge James T Cat in SMASH Ultimate plus Switch Online: SW-2695-1793-4587
NHWestoN
Posts: 19292
Joined: Mon Oct 02, 2017 9:09 pm
Location: North of Boston Boy

Re: Chromium Idiot Box - Or how I learned to love the crazy

Post by NHWestoN »

What?!?!

..... annnnnd all Bigglesworths on stage for Cilantro's big closing number!!!

Okay, I gotta see where this goes, Sil.
User avatar
JamesTCat
Posts: 409
Joined: Fri Dec 11, 2015 11:07 am

Re: Chromium Idiot Box - Or how I learned to love the crazy

Post by JamesTCat »

Note that the stories may be updated at any point. This first story is finalized.
--
Cue opening Theme that was used at the end of the first post

Our first epic (Titled "BOMB") begins with a man in a fighter jet unwittingly dropping an atomic bomb onto Babylon gardens. It doesn't go off, and it's landed in the house of one Peanut Butter and Grape Jelly.

"GRAPE! GRAPE!"

"GGGHHHH... Let me guess, You want to take Bailey and her family to see the show Willy Wonka." Grape guessed, rudely awakened by her brother.

"For a christmas gift I'm taking out of my savings." Peanut Conformed.

"You are aware that the Oompa Loompa songs got old about twenty minutes in this household." Grape bemoaned, having to hear Peanut sing the Oompa Loompa melody all day yesterday after he found out Bailey is now a Blueberry.

"Also, something is blocking the refrigerator."

"All right... Let us see what it is."

And sure enough, they notice the Atomic Bomb that landed there.

"I guess I could take King and Bailey to a Fancy Restaurant."

"For Dragoons Sake Peanut, The Pinball Arcade Diner is not what she calls a Fancy Restaurant. Besides, she could be mistaken for a Pinball."

"No she wouldn't. Pinballs are Metal, not Flesh. And also, how would she Spindash like a Pinball if she doesn't know how?"

"You have a point there."

Suddenly, Earl Sandwich falls through the hole in the structure the Atomic Bomb left in it's landing. His legs are stunned from landing in a standing upright position.

"Remind me to get a repairman here kids." He tries to open the refrigerator door but the Atomic Bomb is blocking the door. He tries hitting it with a hammer, then a crowbar, and so on. No luck.

"Honey, Be careful!" His wife, Mrs. Sandwich tells him. "You can't force it open."

"Well, I can't get my Dr. Dude drink from the fridge."

Peanut rushes to his room, taking out a hammer.

An Imaginate spot plays where Peanut is sharpening his blade for the piggy.

"Peanut, I wouldn't want to smash that piggy if I were you."

"Don't stop me now Ma, that porker's history!"

Cue the smashing of the Piggy bank.

"How did I get a Thirty Thousand Dollar Bonus in my allowance?" Then Peanut gets an idea...

"...Silverball Jim. Come in Silverball Jim."

"This is Silverball Jim. Shoot Goldie."

"Don't call me Goldie. Listen, Peanut Butter Sandwich invited you, his family, a smattering of friends and the King Residence for a joyful round of Broadway."

"Wait? King's Residence? Isn't that the Residence with the now Blueberry Husky? It would be a little funny if Peanut's first choice of Show being the new Willy Wonka."

The Gold Kitsune smirked at the thought. "But in all seriousness, some Bomber Jet dropped something into the Sandwich residence. Investigate after you get back from your jovial rounds. Warning, this message will self-destruct."

"Don't worry Goldie! I'm always on duty!"

Silverball Jim tosses the infosphere bomb into a chute, it heads for the Gold Kitsune where the Infosphere promptly explodes in her face. "Sometimes, I wonder what goes on in his head..."

Meanwhile, at the Kings residence

"Don't Worry my scrumdiddlyumptious wife! I'll fix some tea!" The corgi cheerfully took her order.

King Plugs in the kettle, flips the switch and then the kettle explodes.

"Looks like the kettle killed itself instead of me using it." he states matter of factly

The Pups are crying, thinking that their mom died when they heard the blast. "MOMMY! DON'T LEAVE US WITH A BANG!"

Bailey is waddling down the stairs in order to comfort the pups.

"Look, if you're really feel like that then you should've talked it out with me."King told the Kettle. "you know, let out a bit of steam."

"Honey! The pups thought I died when they heard the blast." Bailey told him, concerned

"It's the kettle! It had a meltdown!"

"It's okay Sweeties! Your Blueberry Mommy's all right." The three pups Ace, Olive, and Rook are drying their tears when they saw their blueberry mother.

After Bailey propped the pups onto her, she used the remote to try and get something started to watch. Blank Screen. They try the Streaming sites, Blank Screen. They try a Game with the Systems, Blank Screen.
Suddenly, Knocking on the door.

"I'll get it dear!" King opens up to a Suit. "Oh no!" He closes the door "It's the Entertainment Detective Man! We haven't paid our licenses!"

"Try to stall him while I get the checks mailed."

"You're a Blueberry. All you could do is waddle."

"I could bounce as well."

"But how would you control your bounds."

"Oh. right."

"The Entertainment detectives?" The pups heard their parents talking "Mom and Dad haven't paid their licenses!" Olive notes

"Quickly Rook! Throw the items out the window!"

The strong pup picks up their items and throws it out the window, only for it to bounce off.
"Well, that's something expected." Rook gets a bright idea "Why don't we sneak it past the detective out into the street!"

"YES! YES! We distract the Detective, Dress up the electronics like an old lady and sneak it out!"

The strong Pup is now carrying electronics out, only to be blocked by the blueberry Husky talking to the detective."Well, if there's one downside to having a blueberry mom..."

"What are we gonna do?" Ace asks Olive. "I think we have to eat all the entertainment mediums!" "Oh right!" Ace replies. "Let me get the Ketchup!" Olive replies, heading to the kitchen.

A few moments later. "So we are planning to buy a License but we have yet to mail the check." "Well, why don't we head to the living room. I'm sure we can figure it out." Bailey tells the Detective.

The trio of beings walk into the living room to see the pups as big as their mom, but not as round.
"Care to explain Kids?" King asks the pups. (Their Metabolism will make quick work of the electronics. Say like an hour or so.)

"AH-HA! So you do have electronics! You cheeky monkeys! Trying that old trick I see? Eat the telly before we come in and whip you?" "...It's a Toaster?" The pups lie.

"ITS A TELLY, A COMPUTER AND ENTERTAINMENT! GIVE IT BACK!"

Bailey bounds to her pups and the Detective "Mr BMAN! Mr BMAN! please! The contents of my children's stomach are private property. Mess with them and we'll sue you."

"But they have to use the restroom at some point, Right?" The detective asks "Yes sir." Bailey replies.

"Well, we'll wait for your pups to digest the machines, then I'll nick them!"

The downside is that a Cheeky Rat plugs in the electronics, giving them a jolt, slimming them instantly. (Remember Kids, Electricity will fry you in real life, not your waistline.) Cue King smashing it's head with a spanner.

Back in the Sandwich Residence Grape is keeping guard on the Bomb. "Maybe we can sell it for scraps."

"Grape! Are you suggesting to profit off of nuclear arms?" Peanut asked, shocked at Grape's Idea,

"Well it's either that or having a Wonka epidemic." "I get the point. Wait... HEY!"

"Well, you wouldn't stop singing that song after finding out Bailey is now a Blueberry."

A bit later, Grape is calling some big time metal dealer "Hello. Yes, Mr Apogee Metals, we have something that we would like to scrap."

"You know, this little book is used to write down all the calls we make. I guess you forgot." "Peanut what are you talking about?"

"Well it's the principle of the thing." "Here." Grape gives Peanut a device that is on some pages that are Mature rated. (But blurred out for the censors.) "Entertain yourself."

"...This is sick!" "If people weren't sick then we wouldn't need penicillin." "Well count me out."

Grape responds to the man on the phone "...So you're sending a guy here straight away? All right, thanks."

In the Dimension of the Three Guardians... "Kitsune, would you lend me your Data?"
"Oh so now you want to hatch a plan?" Kitsune retorted.

"Listen, if you give me your info files of the day, I will be your slave for the next day, all day."
"You wouldn't try anything Munchkin?" "Of Course."

Kitsune relents and gives Pete the data "GOTCHA BUSTER! I HAD MY FINGERS CROSSED!"

"I would try to say something but this is Pete the Power Gamer. He wouldn't listen."

Afterwards, Pete the Griffin finds out about the Atomic Bomb in the Sandwich residence and decides to use it in a grab for power.
"Yes! With this bomb, I will seize control over the world! Become the most powerful being known to man and build a legacy of my very own!"

Pete is preparing to beam into the city "Yes! A Bomb is Property! And a Bomb is Mean, if I could just figure out how to detonate it!"

Cut to a golf course

"Oh Hi! My name is Tiger. I'll be with you in a second!"

He putts the ball, it doesn't come close to the hole "That was unexpected. You know, you should have been here earlier, I made several hole-in-ones. Of course, I was playing Pinball in the clubhouse."

Just then a Bigglesworth entered the scene "Excuse me, have you seen my ball."

"Uh Oh! Here comes trouble." "Here ball!" She finds Tiger. "Oh. It's just a golfer."

"She just been to rehearsals"

"I didn't know you've taken up golf!" "My coach said I havent. Yet."

"You know the man? Pull me up." "Are we going to play golf or what?" "Look. I. Love You." She makes a gesture.

"Hey Windbag! Take a Hike!" She throws her iron up from her hand.

"You know, you should have been with me the other day. With Bob and Frank, I got a Birdie on the 14th." "That's Amazing." "Of course I was aiming for the tenth."

"You remember the song he used to sing before he got zapped in the neck?" "Why you want to sing Right here, Right now?" "Well, I'd love to but I never sing in slacks." "Well, with a little Tiger Magic we can sing."

Cut to a Office after a song.

Pete walked in with a military outfit on, after he found out about the bomb.

"Next Please!" The clerk commanded.

Pete waited for a moment or so "COME ON MAN! There are other people in the cube than just yourselves."

"Things used to be simple until these new changes." a Wolf elder said to Pete "Well of course they were! You have the Four Year Olds shoveling coal in china, Three Year Olds... Shoveling Coal with the Four Year Olds in China. Well I got news for you! The Elders are REALLY BORING! The only way to play is to Play to Win."

Time cut to Pete and the Wolf Elder "I mean, That is the sort of instance where the world's falling apart. I mean, Businesses are handing out other people's status quos! Next thing you know we would have freak shows all in a row getting the orders from the mother ship before we are invaded!"

"NEXT!" He shoves a Fox out of the way. "Excuse me, I was here first!"

"Can I help you" The woman asked "That depends on what I want Doesn't It?" Pete turns to the Wolf "That's an old joke."

He turns back to the woman "I'd like to send a Telegram!"

"Wonderful Just fill out this forum and I'll serve the next person." Pete is writing on the telegram the following
"DRAGON! KITSUNE! WE GOT A BOMB! POSSIBLY THE MEGATON! DO WHAT WE WANT OR WE'LL BLOW IT UP! SIGNED ANON!"


Pete jabs the pen on the note. "Name and Address please." "YOU PUT MY NAME AND ADDRESS THERE!" a few moments later

"By the way, you got the wrong office." The clerk told the god. "If you wish to do a telegram, you will have to go to the post office."

... A while later, Peanut and his party are about to watch the Broadway Willy Wonka.

Peanut told grape as he's carrying the food for the party "Look, I've been trying to sell our bomb to all the undercover agents."

Peanut shows Grape the Burgers ("The CIA are Intrested") Pizza ("The Mafia's giddy.") and Chinese ("And the Chinese are falling all over themselves.")

"Peanut, I think Grape is playing a joke on you." Bailey told him. "No really! We really do have a bomb in our house." Peanut replied to the Blueberry Husky.
"In any moment, my mobile will start ringing and the governments will start bidding." "SSHHHHH! It's starting!" King told them.

...At this point where the squirrels are going to rip Veruca Salt into pieces, Bailey is already going to have nightmares for weeks (which is justified considering the brats actually die in the show) and the pups are willing to defend their Blueberry Mom from whatever's thrown at them.

Grape then gets aggravated when the Oompa Loompa Song is sung during the number since she had to put up with Peanut's singing after finding out Bailey is a Blueberry...

"You know, you should see the London musical version as a different take to this" Jim tells peanut. "I'll keep that in mind."

After the show, King notices Bailey is shivering in fear...

"Honey? What's the Matter?" he asked concerned "I think they know what happened." Bailey answered.

"Who?" "Oompa Loompas. They're gonna tear me a new one."

"Look, it's just fiction! Well, most of it anyways." King comforted her, Also taking into account the gum that made his wife a Blueberry. "but there is literally nothing to fear sweetie."

The pups are trying to defend her from anything and anyone. They tell the "Wonka" Actor "Listen mister! If you or your subordinates even so much as to touch our mom, WE'LL HUNT YOU DOWN AND GUT YOU LIKE A FISH!"

King is livid at his pups for the threat. "ACE! OLIVE! ROOK! HOW DARE YOU THREATEN THAT MAN?!"

"Hey, Lion King's on next!" our party are ordering food for their next Broadway show.

*BEEP-BEEP! BEEP-BEEP!* Jim's communicator is ringing. "I have to go guys."

Jim heads off and opens his communicator "Yes, Goldie?"

"Don't call me that. Listen, Pete is heading to the Sandwich residence to detonate an Atomic Bomb!"

"The same Atomic Bomb that the pilot dropped?" "The very Same!"

"Don't Worry! I will have to intercept Pete immediately!" "Good Luck Jim!"

Jim revs up a spin dash, and fires the charge.

Just then, A female Metal Mouse, Male Metal Dog, and Female Metal Rabbit meets up with Jim.

"Guys, an Atomic Bomb is in Babylon Gardens." "We Know. Let's get there fast." Pete is trying to open the door to the Sandwich residence. "Open Curse You!" He forces the door open to get to the Bomb.

Then, the squad arrives "Daisy Mouse, Break the window to get in. Hal Howler, You bite Pete in the bum. Janet Bunny and I will try to enter to disarm the Atomic Bomb. All right, Break."

Cue a fight scene that I'll fill in later but to make a long story short, the bomb didn't detonate.

In fact, it hatched and revealed a Baby Fighter Jet.

"A BABY FIGHTER JET?! JET! JET! FIGHTER JET!" Cue Pete sobbing at the revelation. "Looks like his plan is a complete Dud." Jim retorted

Just then, Gold Kitsune warps in "Good job Jim. You and your squad have disarmed the Bomb."

"we did? I mean of course we did!"

Jim calls Peanut and company after they left the show "Okay, I see 1 Trillion for the Bomb." *Riiiiing!!!* "Please hold." Peanut picked up jim

"Peanut! The bomb is no more." "All righty then!"

"It's okay, There's no more bomb, all bids are now null and void."

"Now, What did you say to us about blowing it up?" The kitsune threatened pete in a non threatening way. Pete tries to get away from kitsune.

"Thanks Goldie!" Jim told her as she chased Pete into the sunset.

Cue credits theme.
Challenge James T Cat in SMASH Ultimate plus Switch Online: SW-2695-1793-4587
NHWestoN
Posts: 19292
Joined: Mon Oct 02, 2017 9:09 pm
Location: North of Boston Boy

Re: Chromium Idiot Box - Or how I learned to love the crazy

Post by NHWestoN »

Another wild ride. Watched a lot of Marx Brothers, did yah? We lived near an Air Force base so having large metallic military-origin components fall into our lives did occur from time to time.
User avatar
JamesTCat
Posts: 409
Joined: Fri Dec 11, 2015 11:07 am

Re: Chromium Idiot Box - Or how I learned to love the crazy

Post by JamesTCat »

NHWestoN wrote:Another wild ride. Watched a lot of Marx Brothers, did yah? We lived near an Air Force base so having large metallic military-origin components fall into our lives did occur from time to time.
Thank you. Not only Marx Bros that inspired this but also a lot of English and American Comedies such as The Young Ones. In fact, may very well be a Young Ones clone. Also, I am looking forward to continue this and I am hoping Fan Art will appear soon in the future, either of Scenes, the characters, heck even the exclusive variant character Blueberry Bailey.

Hopefully Weston there weren't any Atom Bombs dropped in your town. But seriously, thank you for the comments.
Challenge James T Cat in SMASH Ultimate plus Switch Online: SW-2695-1793-4587
User avatar
CanzetYote
Posts: 371
Joined: Mon Dec 26, 2016 10:32 pm

Re: Chromium Idiot Box - Or how I learned to love the crazy

Post by CanzetYote »

Wait. So Tiger becomes a golfer? Is this is stealth Tiger Woods joke?
Image
Image
Image
Image
NHWestoN
Posts: 19292
Joined: Mon Oct 02, 2017 9:09 pm
Location: North of Boston Boy

Re: Chromium Idiot Box - Or how I learned to love the crazy

Post by NHWestoN »

Don't you love embodied puns? Golf requires energy, focus, riveting attention, patience, a snappy wardrobe, and moneyed connections with status conscious people ... PERFECT sport for Tiger !!!
User avatar
JamesTCat
Posts: 409
Joined: Fri Dec 11, 2015 11:07 am

Re: Chromium Idiot Box - Or how I learned to love the crazy

Post by JamesTCat »

Housepets, Super Sentai, Power Rangers, Kamen Riders, Metal Heroes are owned by Rick Griffin, Toei Company, Saban Brands, Shout Factory and Saburo Yatsude. Everything else by their respective owners. Please support the official release.

Note: It's not Halloween, but I'm writing one anyways.
Oh and by the way, the Puppies are Two years old in the epic. All characters in this universe age like humans.
---
Cue Opening Theme

Our next Epic (Titled "Halloween") begins with Bailey trying out some costumes.

"Honey, aside from the Violet Beauregard outfits, what should I wear for the upcoming Halloween party next week?" "I think anything would look lovely for your first Halloween as a Blueberry. It will complement your lovely blue hues."

Rook jumps into the room with a jumpsuit with white diamonds on the chest, a Belt with a peculiar buckle, Gloves and Boots with Red Daimonds and a helmet that looks like a Tyrannosaurus Rex eating over the head. "I'm gonna be the Red Mighty Morphin Power Ranger! Maybe you could be Blue Ranger Mom!"

"I think you look cute Rook." Bailey is considering with King "Maybe Combining the Violets with The Rangers would be different. After all, peanut thought ahead and gifted me those suits, mixing Violets with Carranger, Gokaiger, Zyuranger, Hurricanger, and Goseiger...'

"Yeah, but if you get the Turbo Outfit on, We will have to reference the time the Power Rangers got cooked into a pizza for our halloween show at the party." ("Excuse me a moment." A comic reviewer can be heard as he walks out the room. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" footsteps can be heard.)

"Maybe to make it fitting, we get baked into a blueberry pie." "Or a blueberry dessert pizza pie." King nuzzles his Berry wife. "Have to make a few calls for the show since we decided."

Cut to the restroom where Ace is calling Kari after he finds orange Fox Fuzz on his mother's stick of deodorant. We hear in a scenic forest where Kari is saying some nonsense off camera

"Pollution. Sometimes its... Up, sometimes its... Down, but it's always... around. Pollution, are you going to find me, or am I going to find you? Although we ride different buses, we know for a fact we both use... Petrol!"

*RRRRRIIIING!* "Hello?" "KARI, DID YOU USE MY MOM'S DEODORANT?!" "What could set that off?"

"Well, there are some unsightly orange hairs mixed with my mom's blue! I could see mine right now!"

"Not on your bum. But you could look on your bum to check."

"Yes and I suppose you being rude is a surefire behavior to start your day's first call!"

"Well, I was smelling a bit musky and so I thought I freshen up a bit" "Oh, and how did that work out?"

It is then revealed on camera that Kari turned Blueberry Fox "Well, for starters I wouldn't need to Eat and Drink for the winter and I can stay warm too." stating that his condition will wear off by the end of winter.

"Kari, That is Theft, It's common stealing, AND IF I EVER SEE YOU'VE TOUCHED IT AGAIN... I'm going to the police. Yes, I will do that on a Woodland Fox who messes with my mother's stuff!" As Ace is hanging it up, you can see Kari blowing a Raspberry to the phone.

Kitsune meanwhile is briefing Silverball Jim

"Silverball Jim! Come in! Do you read me Silverball Jim?"

"Loud and Clear Goldie!"

"Don't call me Goldie! Listen, a Mad Pizza Chief is on the loose and is going to bake a group of Halloween Party goers into a Giant Pizza! Intercept immediately, they don't know what sort of trouble they're in!"

"Goldie have you been watching my Tokusatsus?"

"Yes, I know it sounds like something off of that show but Pete is desperate for power and his Monster Pizza Cook will be the ticket to power!"

"Oh, so Pete's watching them too!" Jim is perturbed.

"Whatever, you know your objective. Remember the Acme Countdown!"

They both recite the countdown
"Five are the senses you need
Four putting Evil on the run
Three Bouts against Corruption and Greed
Two be Sure
Justice have One."
"Kitsune Out!"

Cut to Keene Miltion preparing his estate for the Halloween Party. Just then, The Mad Pizza Chief comes in, getting a bright idea.

"There you are! What took you so long!" Keene notes that he's not the cook he sent.

"You must be for King's show then." he guesses. "well, what do you need?"

"A giant Microwave oven, and various giant ingredients." The monster replies.

"Right, I will get on it!" Keene places orders for the menacing cook.

The thinker in the Milton's garden heard all of it and states "First a Blueberry in the City and now Monsters of the Week?" The flower next to him tells him "Oh shut up and put some clothes on!"

Silverball Jim is patrolling the city and comes across the Milton estate.

"EXCUSE ME!" Jim yells after knocking "EXCUSE ME!!!" Jim yells louder.

"BY DRAGOON, CANT YOU SEE I AM ORDERING STUFF FOR THE KINGS' SHOW?!" Keene screams out the window. "LISTEN, I DON'T CARE IF YOU RAID THE ARCADE FOR PLAYS, OR IF WE HAVE A ODDJOB ACTOR, DON'T BOTHER ME UNTIL THE PARTY!"

"...Okay! I'll see you soon!" Jim walks from the Milton's estate.

"Kitsune, Come in! Kitsune, Do you read me?!" "Oh so you don't call me Goldie when you want to make a wish related to the episode?"

"You're not a genie. And furthermore, I need you to make the Kings actual Power Rangers for the rest of their lives!" "What are you going on about? You seen a Monster of the week and you need the said Dogs and Blueberry to become Super Sentai?"

"Listen, Pete may be wiretapping so time it right so he doesn't expect it. He's also trying the Monster of the Week formula to try and take over the world!" "Oh, that's bad. How about the wish get granted right now?" "Brilliant!"

And so, Kitsune got a few ideas, but since Bailey have so many outfits Ranger-wise, Kitsune decided to make the Kings Gokaigers. With All of the Ranger Keys at their disposal plus more Ranger Keys on the way.

Cue the Ranger Key Chest appearing in the Living room with Mobirates and the entire Ranger Key arsenal. King walked in and sees the items.

"Rook! You wanted to be a Real Power Ranger?" "Yeah?" "Well, the whole family's Power Rangers."

"You must be pulling my leg" Rook sees the items. "Oh. My. GOODNESS! MY WISH CAME TRUE!"

"Rook, what are you going on about?" Bailey is waddling down the stairs with Olive and Ace on her. When she gets there "Oh no..." It's like one of the dreams foreshadowing this.

"I can't be a Ranger, I am a Blueberry. You know my body is cumbersome for fighting Monsters." "Don't worry Mom, it will all come to you when the fighting begins."

"Rooks' right my scrumdiddlyumptious wife. Now I will fix Lunch for the whole family." King gets to the cupboard in the kitchen, but the contents fall and breaks when opened.

"I hope nobody we know have this problem. Well, what would you like my loving family?"

"I would like some Blueberry Pie with cream." Olive replies. Bailey is appalled and proceeds to wash Olive's mouth out with soap.

..."And if you ever use such vulgar slang again I will spank you!" "But Your limbs are in your body." "Then I'll sit on you and whoever uses such filthy slang in this household!" You're better off not knowing the vulgar street slang meaning invented in-universe since around the start of this fan fiction.

"Hey pops, are you going to fix some Blueberry Pie?" Ace asks "What's this "Blueberry Pie and Cream" Bailey's worked up on?" Ace whispers the slang meaning into his ear. "So Blueberry Pie is-"

Smash cut to Bailey sitting on the pups and King with her blueberry bum. "I told you all not to use that slang! Who taught you that slang anyways?!" "We're Sorry! *OUCH!* They wanted Blueberry Pie, the Non-Slang variety. Please get off of us honey!" "Oh..." Bailey gets off her family.

"Well, I better get started." King replies as he gets up. He creates the crust, uses a fork on the crust, adds in some blueberry fillings, and put the top crust on then uses the fork on that to seal the pie.

He starts the oven to preheat it, but gas is all that happens. He strikes a match and the oven explodes, no injuries but they're pushed back. The explosion is heard on a Castaway Raft with some Raccoons on it. "I think I heard something."

"Oh right. Like we can hear from the other side of the ocean." "Also, I think we're sinking." "Well, we're not sinking. and you better take it easy, you've been working too hard."

Cut to a basement where the two are sleeping on a raft. The two wakes up from the dream "Ahh! This is a good holiday." "This is a holiday? In somebody's basement on a raft with a high wattage light bulb cooking us?" "I need to get a lower watt light bulb."

The First Raccoon checks the door, seeing the ocean outside. "Hey Lupin?" "Yes Jack?" "I think I'm hallucinating but I think we're hallucinating." "That's ridiculous! I told you to take it easy!"

"Well, could you check it out for me?" "All right, I am going to show you that there is nothing out of the ordinary. I'll open the door on three. Ready? One... Two..."

As soon as Lupin opens the door, Rook appears on cue, using his super strength to hold what remains of the oven that blew up "Could you scrap this for us? We needed to buy a new oven anyways."

After the handing of the old oven to scrap, Olive gets the bright idea to have the family take the powers for a test drive. "It's only a week before the party but let's test drive our new powers!"

"Good Idea Sis!" Bailey chooses her Gokaiger "I'll be Gokai Blue for obvious reasons." "Dad, you're the man of the house, you be Gokai Red." "Olive will be Gokai Pink, Ace will be Gokai Yellow, and Rook will be Gokai Green."

After they decided and registered their Gokaiger keys, this theme starts to play as "IT'S MORPHIN' TIME!" They insert their Ranger keys into the slot "GOKAI CHANGE!" Cue them turning the key, and transforming. As they are transforming, a large ham Japanese voice yells out "GOKAIGER!"

Each of them grows to human ranger size (Bailey becomes Human Blueberry Ranger Size) as they are in Black Jumpsuits. One by One for each member, XXXV (Roman numerals for 35) passes through them one by one as they form the gloves, boots, belt, jacket, and finally the V in "XXXV" forms their helmets, but the original Gokaigers didn't have tails.

After the Morphing theme and sequence finished, they strike a pose. "Bailey, this is incredible!" King feels his helmet "I feel energized!" "And I think I now know how to fight with my body structure!" Bailey replies to her hubby.

"Well, who wants to go on a Family Patrol?" King asks his Ranger family. The puppies cheer as the family are headed out the door.

Cut to the city where the Ranger Family are jumping from roof to roof. "So, what are we having for dinner?" Olive asks her "Well we could order out." King replies "Really, Burgers, Pizza, Mexican, Tex-Mex and Chinese are BORING!" Ace tells him. "How about that Asian shop that just opened?" Bailey replies to them, seeing a Grand Opening sign in the shop that's a few blocks away. "Right on!"

As they enter, they can see a Japanese Pirate wearing a Red and Gold Jacket as a notable stand out article of clothing, eating curry in the shop. He looks right back to them and looks unimpressed. "(So that's where the Ranger Key Copies and Extra Mobilates went.)" He speaks in Japanese as all his lines are in that language.

"Greetings. Welcome to Babylon Gardens." King greeted the Pirate Ranger. "(Listen to me. Whatever you do, you have to defend your country from the forces of Evil.)" "Well the only evil we have to deal with is Pete the Griffin." Bailey replies "(That's what I'm worried about.)"

"Oh sweet! You must be Captain Marvelous!" Rook replies, having a fanboy glimmer in his eyes. "We're not exact replicas, since our mom is a Blueberry but could you give me your John Hancock in my autograph book?" Cue Marvelous signing Rook's autograph book ("キャプテン・マーベラス" he stylishly writes into it.)

The pups are busy yapping into Marvelous' ear about his past adventures. "...As a matter of fact, let us introduce you." King is worried that they'll be targeted by Pete but they already spilled their identity. "(Do you think if I cut someone like Bailey open, juice will bleed out of them?)" "We'd rather not say. Her body is already somewhat nigh indestructible as is."

"What would you like to eat Bailey my wife?" "All I could eat! I haven't eaten anything all day!" "Well, we can start us off with some sushi."

And so, The day passes with the patrol after they eat. When they got home, they realize that they don't know how to power down. All they really know about morphing is how to do it and how to change into other Ranger Forms.

Luckily the suits stay clean, doesn't stink, No wastes will be in their systems at all times so they don't have to use the bathroom, Food and Drinks are burned to energy when they eat and drink, eating and drinking is a luxury in this form

And it gives Bailey a lovely fruity sent that is mostly blueberries and whatever fruit scents and other smells that is represented by the ranger form, colors, design and motifs.

(Such as Turboranger, Carranger, and Go-Onger smelling like burning rubber with the fruit flavors to fit the Automobile motif along with a Strong "Pizza with The Works" Air Freshener smell for Carranger referencing that infamous moment, smoking Gun Barrels with the fruit scents for Dekaranger and the upcoming Patoranger for police theme, Fresh Blood and live entrails and organs with fruit sents for Liveman referencing the rangers' "friends" act of murder and betrayal on the very first episode and so on.)

They try the Carranger forms next. "GOKAI CHANGE!" Cue the Large Ham Japanese Announcer shouting out "CARRANGER!" King sniffs and turns away, fanning the air "Pheeew! What is that savory aroma reeking of Blueberries, Wild Cherries, Burning Rubber and a very strong "Pizza with The Works" Air Freshener!?!"

"Sorry honey!" Bailey replies with her helmet off, blushing hard as if she had a Mouse on a Motorcycle pass through her intestines. The raccoons scream out from the basement "DISGUSTING! SOMEBODY LIGHT A MATCH!" That gets Bailey to cry river of tears. "LOOK WHAT YOU DID YOU LITTLE JERKS!" King screamed to their castaways.

Later at night after everyone heads to bed and put their helmets off where they can find them. King is cuddling with his Blueberry Ranger. "You know it's not so bad once you get used to it." He replies to her. Bailey smiles at the complement.

...Three days until Halloween, the King Residents are trying to join the Police Force because they have Dekaranger forms. "...See right here on our badges?" King tries to reason with the Police Chief "SPD! "Space Patrol Delta!" Come on! Have a heart and let us join your ranks!"

"You think it's enough for your family to suddenly learn all the police regulations just from having those Ranger Forms? You will need to pass our training, And also your wife smells like smoking gun barrels with Blueberry Scents!" "Thank You Sir!"

After two days worth of studying and work, they passed the tests and they're in the force as the police squad's Power Rangers. The first task for Bailey is rookie duty. She is being rubbed on her blueberry belly by an officer with her helmet off, thumping her foot as she looks like she's enjoying it.

King is filming the whole thing "Are you taping this?" Fox asks King "That tape is for when the Kids are asleep." The kids first line of duty is Parking Officer. "I betcha I can make the most accurate calls that you two!" "YOU'RE ON!" and they're off to races.

The Hula Girl on the dash is quipping "Oh great. Puppy Rangers." "Well at least their hearts are in the right place." The dashboard Funko Pop replies. "The meter's ran out!" cue Olive filling in and slapping a ticket onto the car "Bet our driver going to be livid."

... In the Milton's estate on Halloween "Well, everything's ready. Better get the plates ready." Keene remarks. He opens the cupboard and all the plates, cups and the like are falling down, breaking.

Knocking on the door. "In a Minute!" he takes out an old, dusty kettle. "All I have left kitchen wise is this dusty kettle." He rubs it a bit and a Genie comes out.

"Look at this mess." Keene talks to himself. "All of this fine china breaking all over my kitchen floor. I just wish this one time! Just this one time, this wouldn't happen and I set the tables!"

The Genie listened and he undo the breaking items and magically set the table with them.

"Say... That's very zen like." He tells the party goers "Come in!"

A large cast of characters arrive. "Kari, are you dressed as Violet Beauregard?!" "I used Bailey's Deodorant and this is a suitable costume the shops have."

Bino and Joey entered as Super Mario Bros. "Your princess is in another castle. Come in."

Fox and the K-9 unit are Dressed as English Bobbies. "Lovely and fitting for our boys in blue!"

Peanut and Grape are dressed as S.T.A.R.S agents. "Wesker is going to have a bad time when he messes with you."

Raccoons come in with random costumes "Five Finger Discount? Let's hope not, the police are here."

Eventually, everyone's here. The last to enter are the King Resident, still morphed. "Say, those Gokaiger costumes are authentic." "We don't know how to power down so we had to stay morphed in various Ranger Forms for over a week."

"(Maybe you haven't read all the instructions.)" Marvelous Jeered in a corner of the room. "Maybe later Marv." King responds

When everyone's settled in, The Monster of the week is scoping the scene when he sees the Kings morphed. Pete's commands is heard in his head. "Mad Mike, these are your targets. Those little brats said that I am a giant turkey that can be used to feed entire armies on Thanksgiving. Cook them into a Pizza while I get to your coordinates!" "Right away boss!"

The Kings are entering the stage for the show but what they didn't know is that this isn't a show "Right on time!" Rook acts in character "You know, I had just about enough Pepperoni and Mushrooms!" Bailey adds in her response "We're here to toss your salad!"

"Well in that case, how about a little fire and brimstone! Orders Up!" Mad Mike throws the pizzas like discus, exploding on contact in the rangers, causing them to fall. "A little too spicy for you?" Cue pizzas flying around, trying to hit our rangers.

"Look out!" King and his Family are trying to dodge the pizzas, with Bailey squashing and stretching like she always do with her flexible blueberry body as she dodges. A few moments in, the pizza hit, causing explosions on them, sending them flying to the next scene.

"Wow, this is like a real episode of Power Rangers!" Changing Names stated to his litter mates munching on popcorn (You know him, Miles' cub.) "We can see that Tommy Oliver." His litter mates replies, dressed as Zyurangers in not so cheap yet not so expensive costumes with Changing Names as Dragon Ranger.

"Do you think they're winning?" Peanut asked Grape, worried about the Kings. "Judging by the TV Secludes in both Japan and America, I say they win once a week." "Out of an entire week of battles?" Now Peanut is really scared stiff.

"(Isn't this the one where the Carrangers get baked into a Pizza?)" Marvelous asks Kenne. "Well judging by the audience reaction, I say the realism of the Kings' show is off the charts!" Keene replies, oblivious to the danger coming up.

"Now to serve up your final slice Power Rangers!" Mad Mike notes the revving movement of the cars "HUH? WHAT'S THIS?!" Cue the Pegasus Thunder and Dragon Cruiser firing shots at Mad Mike, causing explosions near him. "Trying to drive me away huh?! I'll turn things around!"

Cue evil pizzas getting on the two vehicles wheels and steering wheels. "Now they're MY Wheels!" Mad Max is working his Black Magic "IT'S DELIVERY TIME!" as the cars roll into the stage, in front of the Kingkaigers. "What's he done to Dragon Cruiser?!" Bailey asks her teammates "And Pegasus Thunder?!" King also states.

"Give them a taste of their own cooking! FIRE!" The two vehicles fire their guns at the Kingkaigers, knocking them down with an explosive blast. "It's gotta be the Pizzas on the wheels of the Rentals Honey! He's turned them against us!"

The two power vehicles are revving up their engine and the family's running, into the next scene where the dreaded Colossal Cooker is located. Cue the cars running into them, sending them to the Colossal Cooker where they landed on a Work in Progress giant Pizza.

"Hey, Where are we?!" King asks as he notes the microwave oven door closing on them "Oh no! Come on guys get up!" He rolls Bailey on her feet "Get up Bailey, We can let him close that door on us!" Door closes on King, Bailey, and Rook "AAAHHHH!"

"Olive, am I dreaming or is this stuff what I think it is?" "No Ace, this is defiantly cheese." Mad Mike peers in the oven "And a very good cheese too! You see, I only use the finest ingredients for my Power Rangers Pizza! Ahhahaha!"

"You'll never get away with this!" King takes out his Gokai Gun, firing it only to have it bounce off the force field. "Ah ah ah! You can't penetrate the force field!" Mad Mike jumps off the step ladder. "...Besides you might cook yourselves from the ricochets and we still need more ingredients!"

Silverball Jim enters and looks at the show "They can really act." Rock tells him "Look at them." That feeling of fear and the cries for help are legitimate because it's not actually a scripted show. They're in real danger!

"Don't Cry! It's only onions!" Cue giant onions being thrown into the rangers' paws. "Then Green Peppers, Mushrooms and Pepperoni!" cue those giant ingredients being thrown at them. "And the secret to a great pizza: Four Cheese!" Cue Mad Mike piling on lots of Giant strands of grated four cheese onto the Kingkaigers.

"Now it is time to heat things up!" Cue the monster pressing a button and the rangers being cooked into the pizza. "Use my colossal cooker for a ten minutes and you'll have a beautiful, mouth watering, deep dish Power Rangers Pizza!" The Kingrangers are screaming in pain as they're being cooked into a Pizza.

"Wait a minute... THIS ISN'T A SHOW! THEY'RE IN SERIOUS DANGER!" Kenne replies as his siblings are asking. Just as Silverball Jim is going to call Kitsune on his wrist communicatior, in a instant, everyone is inside their own colossal cookers with their work in progress pizzas, with Kari having his very own Pizza to himself.

"Did you really think I'll let you ruin my triumphant moment?" Pete asked the party goers "PETE YOU *CENSORED BLEEPING*!" Kitsune is screaming at Pete through Silverball Jim's Wrist communicator. "You think this is some sort of sick joke?!" "I'm only in it to win it! Also those brats called me a "Giant Turkey that would feed the troops on Thanksgiving!" the Brats he's referring to are Ace, Olive and Rook as they are being cooked with their parents.

"Now what I want is World Domination or every ten minutes I eat the Party goers. Slice. By. SLICE!" Pete fuses with Mad Mike and is now preparing the pizzas, with Kari's being a dessert Pizza and Miltons being The Most Expensive Pizza ever sold.

Cue the entire city's airwaves being hijacked to show his fiendish ransom in motion. Kitsune is sweating bullets as Multiple Petes are adding in ingredients for all of his pizzas. "Oh man, oh geez, oh FORK! I can't give in to Pete's demands! There must be something I could do..."

Then Kitsune remembers the Sixth Ranger trope starting somewhere between Dynaman to Maskman and becoming a regular staple with Zyuranger. "I've got it! I know what I could do to save them!" Kitsune gets to work on her own ranger.

"...and now to heat 'em up!" the Petes turn on their colossal cookers "Use the Colossal cookers to cook them for about ten minutes and you'll have beautiful, scrumptious, mouthwatering, deep dish, Halloween Prey pizzas!" Cue the party goers screaming in pain as the people watch in horror.

...After they're all cooked, they're still alive and moving as they are all baked into their pizzas.

A few minutes later, a female Signalman walks into the mansion "Smells like trouble. The source seems to come from these very large ovens."

"Hello in there, do you require assistance?" the Kingkaigers' doors are opening (Bailey replies "Yes!") "Power Rangers and Hostages?" she acts bewildered. "They've all been cooked into Giant Pizzas!"

"Brilliant deduction there Captain Obvious!" Pete Jeers "Do I know you from somewhere?"

"You'll pay for that you fiend!" she gets her Signalizer into buster mode and fires a shot at Pete, knocking him down with an explosion. "I'm on my way rangers!" The family are thanking this mysterious being as she tries to get them out. ("Oh Thank you!" "Didn't see you there.")

"GET AWAY FROM MY PIZZAS!" Pete screams as he spawns exploding pans of Pizzas in his hands. "You again?!" He throws the pizzas, knocking Signalwoman away with explosions. She is knocked into the view of the Brainwashed vehicles as they try to run her over.

Several rams later, Signalwoman sees the multiple Petes with giant knives and forks, pizzas all in a circle, intent on eating everyone. "Finally! IT'S SUPPERTIME!"

The hostages and Kingkaigers are being viewed in a pan-around on their pizzas. Kari (in his own dessert pizza,) is instead cheering "HALLELUJAH! THIS IS THE BEST HALLOWEEN HORROR STORY I'VE EVER BEEN IN!"

"Oh, you smell so good!" Pete is drooling a bit "Which one should I eat first?" He sticks his knife on Bailey's blueberry body "Oh! You don't wanna eat me! I'm not completely cooked!"

"I hate it when my food doesn't agree with me!" Pete bemoans. "Not so fast criminal!" Signalwoman points at Pete, she turns her head noticing the rampaging vehicles.

"These vehicles have become quite a traffic hazard!" she gets her signalizer "Maybe they'll respond to a simple traffic signal." she activates a red signal "RED LIGHT NOW! HALT!" The vehicles stop in their tracks as their pizzas falls off.

"The evil pizzas were no match for a simple stop light. And now..." Pete is getting impatient "Before long I'll eat you all so quit complaining!" "STOP!" Signalwoman fires a shot at Pete. Direct hit as he is sent flying again!

"YOU AGAIN! I'LL TEACH YOU TO INTERRUPT MY DINNER!" He throws an explosive pizza at Signalwoman but she rolls out of the blast and jumps super high, readying her signalizer. "SIGNALIZER! BUSTER MODE!" as she breaks everyone free from their giant pizzas with rapid fire shots.

The Kingkaigers and hostages breaks free from their pizzas as they get to their feet. "YOU'VE RUINED MY PIZZAS!" "Yes I have." The Kingkaigers goes to the Signalwoman to thank her "Good Job stranger." "You're welcome, now let's close his kitchen!" "You got it!"

Cue those rangers jumping high into the air, with Ace and Olive giving a flying punch, Rook and Bailey kicking him with with both feet with a flying kick, then King and Signalwoman giving him a double punch to the face.

"Let's put him away! Gokai Galleon Buster online!" Cue the Gokai Galleon Buster going online. "Insert your keys and get ready for the Final Wave Finisher!" King commands. Cue the rangers slotting in their Gokaiger Keys to deliver the finishing move.

The cannon fire, The Large Japanese Ham shouts out "FINAL WAVE!!!" And Pete is defeated in a giant explosion! At the cost of the whole mansion being totaled, everything turned out well in the end. There's even a giant Mushroom cloud where the top is Pete's head shedding tears of pain.

"Well, with all that out of the way...VICTORY POSE!" The family and Signalwoman cheers, doing the Yatterman Victory Dance as they chant "HUZZAH! HUZZAH! KINGKAIGERS!"

"By the way, you owe me billions in damages." Keene told King, handing him his estimates as king looks shocked. The rest of the family and Signalwoman are laughing.

"and so our heroes win their first fight against the fiendishly naughty Pete the griffin! But as they are now Power Ranger for every one of their lives and afterlives, will they defend the city from the forces of evil? And Marvelous have moved out after telling them how to power down from their ranger forms." A narrator explains to the audience as the family's riding off into the sunset.

"Next time on another one of these episode in this genre and format, they will get their very own GokaiOh. Who is this Signalwoman that helps them out? Will they save the worlds? These questions and more shall be answered and asked for years to come!"

"GANBARE! HUZZAH! HUZZAH! KINGKAIGER!..."

Cue this as part one of the two parts of the Kingkaiger Episodes' Credits.
Last edited by JamesTCat on Mon Nov 27, 2017 10:23 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Challenge James T Cat in SMASH Ultimate plus Switch Online: SW-2695-1793-4587
NHWestoN
Posts: 19292
Joined: Mon Oct 02, 2017 9:09 pm
Location: North of Boston Boy

Re: Chromium Idiot Box - Or how I learned to love the crazy

Post by NHWestoN »

Okay, somebody in your family was in vaudeville, right?
User avatar
JamesTCat
Posts: 409
Joined: Fri Dec 11, 2015 11:07 am

Re: Chromium Idiot Box - Or how I learned to love the crazy

Post by JamesTCat »

NHWestoN wrote:Okay, somebody in your family was in vaudeville, right?
Actually, it may feel like it but I try my best in the vaudeville style writing. Also let me go over some plans.

The fanfiction will alternate between regular comedy format and the Kingkaigers Power Rangers/Super Sentai format (You know them, the King Residence. King, Blueberry Bailey, Ace, Olive and Rook became their own Gokaigers with *SPOILERS* as the technical sixth ranger Signalwoman.)

What I am aiming for is a great ongoing epic for the latter and a big Movie Length Fic just in time for near the end of Super Sentai's big 45th anniversary.
Last edited by JamesTCat on Tue Nov 28, 2017 4:49 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Challenge James T Cat in SMASH Ultimate plus Switch Online: SW-2695-1793-4587
NHWestoN
Posts: 19292
Joined: Mon Oct 02, 2017 9:09 pm
Location: North of Boston Boy

Re: Chromium Idiot Box - Or how I learned to love the crazy

Post by NHWestoN »

All worthy ambitions ....
Locked