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[FanFic] Making the wrong choice (V.2) 
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Post Re: [FanFic] Making the wrong choice (V.2)
Well, I'm caught up on this wonderful story. The beginning for some reason reminded me of the Stanley Parable. "Oh wait, you weren't supposed to make that choice.
I really like the direction you're taking exploring Joel's character... and definitely the depth you've given to Daisy.


Wed Sep 23, 2015 8:56 pm
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Post Re: [FanFic] Making the wrong choice (V.2)
Excuse me, i need to correct something...

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"Leave her alone you bully!" That was all the warning bishop got before being tackled. Skidding off the grass and through a patch of dirt where one of the other dogs was busy burying a bone.

"Um, he wasn't... oh dear..."

Immediately, he was batting at the other dog's face with his paws and snarling. trying to push her off. one of the shoves rolling both of them to the side so he was on top now.

"please stop fighting..."

Breaking free, Bishop pulled back and balled a fist ready to strike, when the two made eye contact. Both immediately freezing.

"This really isn't- oh. Good. They stopped."

"Rip?" Bishop asked, dumbfounded. Liberal coating of dirt aside, it looked just like her. She even had her old collar with the Weyland Yutani logo tag.

"Bishop?" She asked back, apparently recognizing him.

The next second somehow went from complete stillness to a flurry of motion and ripely burst free, only to grab her little brother in a bear-hug.

"Little brother is here! Little brother is here!" Ripley cheered in a sing-song voice. Hugging the slightly smaller corgi as he struggled fruitlessly.

"I'm not 'little', you're only older than me by ten minutes!" He barked, somewhat half heartedly. It was nice seeing her again. It wasn't until he started hearing the cute lab he'd been talking to laughing that he started making a genuine effort to break free. "Let. Go. of. Me." He growled getting annoyed at the attention.

Rather than comply, Ripley's focus turned to the tag Joel had given him, a black chess piece. Changing the subject. "Where'd your old tag go?"

"The Colonial Marine badge? I ditched it, after mom ditched us. Didn't want the reminder." Bishop grumbled, annoyed at being reminded of that fact, and more than happy to go back to forgetting it.

"But we don't match anymore..." She whimpered, finally releasing him.

"Yeah... well..." he mumbled, rubbing a spot on his arm that was all pins and needles from getting squished. "...I didn't think of that."

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Wed Sep 23, 2015 10:32 pm
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Post Re: [FanFic] Making the wrong choice (V.2)
One of the more violent reunions ever, but ended up rather sweet. Of course, I've seen dogs fight, it gets really rough.

Also had to look up the references on their old tags. Never did see those movies.

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Wed Sep 23, 2015 10:45 pm
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Post Re: [FanFic] Making the wrong choice (V.2)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Alien_characters Wrote:
The Marines from the Sulaco — along with Ripley, Bishop, and company executive Burke — set down on LV-426 and discover that Aliens have killed almost all of the colonists.

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Wed Sep 23, 2015 10:48 pm
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Post Re: [FanFic] Making the wrong choice (V.2)
Yeah, I had a rather sheltered childhood.

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Wed Sep 23, 2015 10:50 pm
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Post Re: [FanFic] Making the wrong choice (V.2)
I really do like how the new chapter has come out!

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Thu Sep 24, 2015 1:42 am
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Post Re: [FanFic] Making the wrong choice (V.2)
Nice work I can see that you put some characterization on Bishop's and his long lost sister. It bring to light that people who where at one point alomst siblings can drift apart with time apart.


Tue Sep 29, 2015 9:23 pm
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Post Re: [FanFic] Making the wrong choice (V.2)
it had taken more effort than he liked, but Joel had managed to get Steve comfortable even despite the running commentary from the dogs nearby. Thankfully it didn't last more than an hour. The brown mutt had seemingly lost interest after it became apparent he was being ignored, the group Heading off.

Joel still wasn't sure why he had been drawn to this particular park, but something told him he was supposed to be here... Though that same something told him he was early... whatever it was though, Steve seemed calmer now, and was actually willing to leave the car. Heading over to a picnic table, and calling bishop over, he did not expect an entire pack of dogs to follow the corgi back.

"Who're your friends?" Joel asked with a laugh, as Bishop got closer.

"Well, this is Daisy,"

"hello..."

"And this is my sister Ripley."

"Hi!"

Joel wasn't quite sure what to say to that. He hadn't realised Bishop had any siblings. In hindsight it was probably stupid not to think of that, but still... The resemblance was clear enough up close. They had mostly the same colors and markings save for her main color being brown instead of gray, The detail that stood out most though was the emerald green eyes. A rare trait for dogs as far as he knew.

"You live near here?" Joel asked curious, getting a nod from Ripley in return. "I don't have to keep an eye out for face-huggers, do I?" He asked with a grin, doing his best not to laugh.

Immediately both corgis groaned, Bishop face-pawing while Ripley just demanded why everyone who sees them together asks that.

"It's the names, Old movie reference." Joel explained. Holding out a hand to shake Ripley's paw. "It's nice to meet you. I'm Joel, and this is Steve."

The cat in question didn't respond at first, before getting a dopey grin on his face and mumbling something about winning while staring upward, as if he was trying to look at and have a conversation with his own forhead. Bishop face-pawing, again, and Ripley asking if he's always like that.

"Sort of..." Was all Joel got out before Bishop was monopolizing his sisters attention. Meanwhile the Daisy had gone silent and plastered a manic grin across her face. It was clear to Joel that neither was exactly comfortable with this many others around but the two corgis, aparently twins, however seemed oblivious as they had a fair amount of catching up to do.

"You don't have to say anything, if you don't want to." Joel explained, noticing the lab relax a bit at those words. Not much was said, but not much needed to be to pass a few hours, at least until Joel had gone back to the car and dug a board game out of the trunk. then a lot was said, though still mostly the twins.

Those two could be extremely competitive when they wanted to be, and something about Ripley brought out the inner schemer in her brother. Or maybe it was the other way around? it was hard to tell. Not always to their own ends though. During the last game, they both seemed intent on making sure Daisy won without her realizing they were helping her...

it wasn't until the sun started to go down and the girls' owner came looking for them that Joel realized they were the only ones left in the park.

---------------------

After the park, Joel continued on his way to the house he had picked out... only to find the road blockaded by a dozen dogs setting up an impromptu party and or parade, or something, in the middle of the street, with more filing in every second. Further up the road he could see the movers had unloaded everything but were unable to leave the driveway because of the same blockage.

"What in the world?" Joel wondered aloud.

"Welcome home Fido? Who's Fido?" Bishop chimed in, reading the first of a set of banners a large bulldog was making...

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Sat Jul 30, 2016 8:50 am
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Post Re: [FanFic] Making the wrong choice (V.2)
It was surprisingly needed for you to step away from the "hi, I'm Daisy," deal. Makes sense, since she's around others that she's more comfortable with.

I honestly thought that this would be the moment where Fox was kidnapped, but before Fido showing up was a surprise. Maybe a more positive start to their relationship could happen. Or he'll start getting his original feelings of distancing himself from him, which could complicate things.

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Sat Jul 30, 2016 5:07 pm
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Post Re: [FanFic] Making the wrong choice (V.2)
D-Rock Wrote:
I honestly thought that this would be the moment where Fox was kidnapped,
wrong year.

- - - - -

Getting through the small horde of canines had taken more effort than should have been strictly necessary. Ironically he owed it to the brown mutt from earlier trying to derail the event. Arriving at his new home and escorting the other two inside, it struck him how much smaller it looked... Which was odd because he couldn't remember having seen the inside save for a few realtor photos of the kitchen...

Shrugging it off he headed for the washroom to put away his shaving kit and-

What do you think you're doing?

-completely froze hand on the doorknob, before glancing around for the voice could swear he just heard. Something unsettlingly familiar about it.

"Mr. Robinson are you-"
"Relax kitty, he does this sometimes. I know how to snap him out of it. HEY KING!"

Back to his senses Joel let out an almost canine growl, "I've told you not to call me that..."

"Yeah see? He hates the nickname I came up for him back at the pound. Always gets his attention." Bishop continued as if he hadn't heard Joel at all. His mind elsewhere.

I don't hate it... It just feels wrong...

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Last edited by Buster on Wed Aug 17, 2016 7:21 am, edited 1 time in total.



Tue Aug 16, 2016 11:05 am
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Post Re: [FanFic] Making the wrong choice (V.2)
I'm guessing the second line is supposed to be "shrugging it off"? Anyway, wow, now he's remembering Pete. Nice detail on Steve not calling him dad, as he's still convinced that his original owners are coming back.

Seems Joel has managed to keep a few dog-like tendencies.

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Post Re: [FanFic] Making the wrong choice (V.2)
D-Rock Wrote:
I'm guessing the second line is supposed to be "shrugging it off"?

Gah! stupid autocorrect... that's what i get for writing that on my phone i guess.

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