Burning Desire: The Power Within

What do you call a fic that's not a fic

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Almost_Alice
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by Almost_Alice »

Since I now have an account, I have the ability to say that I simply love your fanfics. You've put a lot of suspenseful and confusing elements into Burning Desire, and that's good because it keeps people (such as myself) interested. I saw that you've put up a few chapters since I last read and am sad that I do not have the time to read them right now.

As for your previous story about King, I thought it was adorable. I figured out the "Lover boy, crush" part right away. I'm so happy SilentPrincess828 got me interested in Housepets and your fic, and I can't wait to see some others on the site.
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by JeffCvt »

Almost_Alice wrote: You've put a lot of suspenseful and confusing elements into Burning Desire
I try my best to do so. Glad to see that it worked.
Almost_Alice wrote:and I can't wait to see some others on the site.
I highly recommend Valerio's. It's a lot to read and catch up on, but it also has a lot of action and is well written. There is a reason his has the most views out of any current fic.
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by Almost_Alice »

Aw, poor Nox...

As for your little intro, I suspect that they're throwing a surprise, "Thanks for saving us"/"Welcome back from the vet" party for Jiff.

If we get another dog, I'm afraid I must name him Nox now. :D
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by sean21 »

wow another update and its very sad i actually cried TT-TT keep up the excellent work *gives you a thumbs up*
Shawn "hey."
Sean "greetings."
Alex "hi everyone ^_^"
Justin "wazz'up dudes."
David "i hope it rains today."
Shawn "this is my loving family, sort of speak."
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by JeffCvt »

sean21 wrote:i actually cried TT-TT
Ummm... I wasn't intending to make people cry, sorry about that.

If it makes up for it, I should have the next part sometime tonight.
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by copper »

Sounds good!
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by JeffCvt »

Season 2 Introduction Part 2


Slowly, the door to the GODC opened.

He flicked the lights on. It was over. He knew.

“Surprise!!”

A bunch of dogs and cats jumped out and threw confetti and streamers all over Jiff.

The GODC had decided to throw a party for the dog that had saved the lives of multiple cats and dogs. And they had decided that the neighborhood cats should be able to join, seeing that there was no reason to say that they couldn’t.

Jiff was surprised, but had figured as much. Why else would Bino have invited him to come to the club the moment he would be allowed to leave the vet?

Oh well. The vet said I’m fine to walk around a little; I just can’t strain myself until the stitches have been removed. *Sigh* I wish that they would be able to do that soon so I can take these bandages off. They’re itchy and I can’t dye my fur with them on. I’ve never liked this white fur of mine.

“Well?” Stealer asked as he came out of the crowd. “Did we surprise you?”

“Yea.” Jiff said in a kind of monotone voice. “A surprise party, the perfect way to say thank-you to someone who has over one hundred stitches in his chest, multiple healing internal injuries, and should not be put under any unnecessary stress, like having the entire pet population of this town jump out at him yelling ‘Surprise.’”

Everyone got quiet pretty quick. “Ummm…” Stealer tried to find the right words in this situation. “Well, when you put it that way…”

Stealer stopped when Jiff took his paw and put it on his shoulder. “Thank you Stealer. This is the nicest thing anyone has done for me in years.”

With that, everyone cheered and started to swarm around Jiff, asking him questions about what had happened, how he felt, and other things like that.

-----

Eventually, everyone calmed down as they got to talk to Jiff and there questions were answered. After about an hour and a half, everyone was minding their own business, trying not to bother Jiff too much. Stealer had been clear before the party, Jiff was still hurt and they were to give him his space during the entire thing.

Finally having some free time, Jiff went to the refreshment table and grabbed a soda.

“Are you sure that you should be drinking soda in your condition?” Sasha asked as she walked up. She had been waiting for the crowd around him to clear before she talked to him.

Stealer pulled the tab and took a sip. “I’ll be fine. The vet said I can drink soda, just as long as I stop before I look like that guy.” he said motioning to a corgi with a King from a chess set hanging on his collar. He was dancing on one of the tables, obviously drunk. “Come to think of it, I only saw him drink one soda.”

“Yea.” Sasha said as she lowered her head and kind of looked at the floor.

“Sasha, look at me.” Jiff said gently.

She looked at him. Jiff looked back at her and said “You want to know why I was such a jerk right before I left, right?”

“Well, it’s just that I didn’t remember you being so mean. You surprised me, and made me very upset.”

Jiff kind of chuckled a little bit. “I hope you don’t remember me being mean the first time we met, I wasn’t.” Then he got serious. “I acted like that to push you away from me. You experienced firsthand the kind of trouble that follows me. I can’t become too attached to anyone because of things like that. To be sure that it won’t happen to those who I met, I try to push everyone as far away as I can. Even if I use a fake name and dye my fur, you can never be too careful. I’m sorry for having done that to you, it wasn’t easy. You understand, right?”

Sasha smiled. “Of course I understand. But you may want to tell everyone else you were mean to also.”

Jiff looked up and saw Ralph coming. “I think I’m about to. Do you think you could give us some time?”

“Of course.” Sasha said as she walked away.

Ralph walked up, and he was also holding a soda.

“I already know what you are going to ask me.” Jiff said.

“Is that so?” Ralph asked.

“You want to know why I tried to drive you to the verge of insanity if I was so dedicated to protecting you and everyone else when Nox came.”

“You’re pretty good.” The German shepherd said.

Jiff chuckled. “And don’t forget it.” Then he got serious again. “I did that to show you how easy it can be too lose hold on what is really important. You ended up forgetting about your two friends and squad-mates, and tried to solve the problem yourself. I would say you had a pretty good learning experience if I do say so myself.”

“I guess I did.” Ralph said, almost sounding amused. “And despite that, I want to get even with you. Once you’re better, maybe we could have a rematch.”

“If you think you’re up to it…”

-----

Bino was standing in a corner, watching Jiff and Ralph talk.

I can’t believe that he’s actually a nice guy. At least the attention that he has been getting has made everyone forget that I ran after Kyria. Although I guess I should make up some reason why in case someone decides to ask. Hopefully none of the cats will end up trying to show up like Kyria did.

As if she knew that Bino was thinking of her, Kyria walked up and said “Thanks for letting the cats join the party. That means a lot to me.”

Bino just rolled his eyes. “Go thank Stealer; he’s the one who suggested it. I only agreed with him once he managed to convince most of the other dogs it was a good idea.”

“Well, thanks anyway.” Kyria said with a smile. “I wouldn’t want you to look like a cat lover.”

“Yea.” Bino just kind of muttered.

Now Kyria rolled her eyes. “Well, I can tell that you’re super chatty right now. I think I should go before you talk me to death.”

“Wait!” Bino said. “I’ve been wondering something. Why did you want to come to one of the GODC meetings? I mean, you’re a cat. What could have been of possible interest to you at the meeting?”

Instead of telling him, she simply grabbed his collar and pulled him into a kiss. Bino was so surprised that he didn’t pull away, he simply stood there for what seemed to be an eternity. Everyone at the party became silent as they watched the kiss.

Finally, Kyria pulled away and said “Why it was you, silly.” quiet enough that no one else could hear. Bino simply stood there, stunned. Right before she walked away, Kyria said “And don’t worry, I’ll be sure to tell everybody how I was dared to do that by a friend.” and winked.

As she walked across the floor to go talk to some of her new friends, Bino realized something.

Kyria was beautiful. She was Babylon Gardens cat equivalent of Sasha. Come valentine’s day, she would probably get as much stuff from the neighborhood cats as Sasha gets from the dogs.

Bino simply stood frozen in the corner for the next half-hour.

-----

During Bino’s chat with Kyria, Jiff and Ralph had finished talking and Jiff had started to talk with Fido. They had only started when the whole room went silent from Bino and Kyria’s kiss.

After Kyria walked away, leaving Bino frozen in the corner, Fido said “Wow. Who would have thought that the new cat would be so open about her preferences?”

“It kind of makes you wish that she was your girlfriend, huh?” Jiff asked.

Fido blushed as he stuttered “Wha- wait NO! I meant-”

Before Fido could get another word out, Jiff reached out and pulled a single black cat hair from Fido’s collar. “Probably a leftover from your last snuggle session that you didn’t catch. Let me guess, that cat Sabrina, right? You did good finding someone like her.”

Fido was quite embarrassed. “You’re… not going to tell anyone, right?”

“Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me. I’ve kept much worse in my life.”

“Thank you.” Fido said before he walked away nervously.

I have to hand it to him; he does a really good job of hiding his relationship. They probably had that snuggle session earlier today, but I didn’t smell any cat on him at all. Almost like magic.

Jiff looked over and saw Max kind of stumble toward him. “You have a few sodas Max?”

“Just a few.” He said. He was still in control, just a little wobbly. “I’m done with them now. I have enough self control to stop.”

Jiff was interested. “But why did you start in the first place? You seemed to do more than just quench your thirst.”

Max smiled a toothy grin. “I’m turning over a new leaf. I’m not going to be a bully anymore. Although I may still enjoy the small prank here and there. That’s why. I’m celebrating.”

“Well that’s nice.” Jiff said. Then he leaned forward and whispered to Max “But if I hear that you are still being a bully to anyone, I will carry out that threat I made to you the first time we met. Do you remember that?”

Max seemed to sober up immediately.

“Judging by the look on your face, I’m going to guess that you do.” Jiff backed away from Max’s face. “Although I wouldn’t mind a small prank every now and then. Just don’t try to pull anything on me.”

Max seemed to feel better after that. “Of course.” He said as he smiled a toothy grin again.

Joey walked up with a nervous look on his face. “Am I interrupting something?” he asked.

“Nope.” Max stated as he walked away.

“What would you like Joey?” Jiff asked.

Joey’s nervousness showed when he said “I just wanted to come and say that I’m sorry for that day we first met. I ended up venting my troubles and frustrations to you, and you just blew up at me, and-”

Jiff held a paw up, signaling Joey to stop talking. “I didn’t blow up. I was actually listening to you, trying to find a way to help you while making sure you didn’t want to become friends. As you can tell, being my friend can be pretty dangerous.”

Joey was dumbstruck. “You were trying to help me? You intended for me to come back from what you said and realize that I have more than just my nerdy friends?”

“That was the plan from the start. Trust me, if I really wanted to hurt you emotionally, I could have.”

Joey was ecstatic. “I have to go find Squeak and tell her now, she’s still pretty mad at you. Thanks!” he yelled as he ran into a crowd, looking for Squeak.

-----

The party went on, but pretty soon everyone got tired and one by one, they went home.

Well, everyone except Jiff that is.

Jiff went to the shelter. Not because that was where he was staying, he still had to spend a few more nights at the vet.

Jiff walked into the back and stood in front of a cage that held a huge, black dog.

“You should have just killed me.” Nox said.

“The vet said that if I had hit you any harder, I probably would have.”

Nox just scoffed at him. “So why didn’t you?”

“Because there is only one dog in this world that I have to kill, and you know where he is.”

Jiff got his face as close to the cage as he dared. “Where is my former student? I know that he sent you here.”

END

I give Silentprincess828 credit for reviewing my story for mistakes. (Once she reads it)


And there it is. The intro into season two.
Now, I'm going to be doing some things differently for a while. I am going to kind of go away from the main plot of Jiff and his student for the most part. I'm going to try and work at making some of Ricks characters act more like themselves and also develop the personality of some of my own.
Now that's not to say I won't be doing anything with Jiff, I do plan on bringing up the main plot in a few small ways and one big way at the end of the season. I just want to try to work on a few pieces that aren't so serious and maybe even a little funny.

So to start off season 2, I'm going to give a choice of what you would like to see written next.

1. Kyria gets back at Danny in her own way
or
2. Max re-challenges Marvin to spend a night in the haunted house.

I am going to give a three day voting period. After that, the decision is final.

Leave your vote as a post in this thread, and I hope to hear from you to see what you would like. :D
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by 0404 »

Mind=blown
It's dramatic! And Bino iz in love!?!
It worth a wait!! but a Cliff hanging
Not sure about voting for me, I have to think about it.
Last edited by 0404 on Thu May 31, 2012 11:02 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by legendario13 »

And Nox wasnt his Student!?
He should really try and get a gun then.

I would go for....mmm...2, option 2
A moment of enlightenment...aaaaand it's gone
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by 0404 »

legendario13 wrote:And Nox wasnt his Student!?
He should really try and get a gun then.
Hey no guns for pets!
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by copper »

Hmm... Option 2 would have more laughs, I think.

What A Twist!!! I wonder what his student looks like then. *ponders*
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by JeffCvt »

copper wrote: I wonder what his student looks like then. *ponders*
That makes two of us. :lol:
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by Roarin »

Surprise! Its a Surprise!!! Party.
Wooh. Kyria and BIno.
Option 1... REVENGE!!!
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by legendario13 »

texascat018 wrote:Hey no guns for pets!
K.. :roll: not even a knife? a little one?
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by sean21 »

the plot thickens *dun dun dun*
JeffCvt wrote:Ummm... I wasn't intending to make people cry, sorry about that.
someone over the internet wrote:never apologize for capturing the emotion of your readers
, whether it was indened or not thats a good thing

also i cried becuase the other pets formed a wall to protect Jiff, even if they didn't stand a chance against Nox they still tried, thats the part i liked
Shawn "hey."
Sean "greetings."
Alex "hi everyone ^_^"
Justin "wazz'up dudes."
David "i hope it rains today."
Shawn "this is my loving family, sort of speak."
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by JeffCvt »

Alright, so far the count is:
1 vote for Kyria getting back at Danny.
2 votes for Max and Marvin.

Man, I can't wait for the three days to be up. I want to write so badly right now, but I don't want to start until I know what the choice is. I don't currently have any plans to do the story that loses, so I don't want to start one and the other one wins the vote.
Oh well, I'm just going to wait and see what happens.

sean21 wrote:
JeffCvt wrote:Ummm... I wasn't intending to make people cry, sorry about that.
someone over the internet wrote:never apologize for capturing the emotion of your readers
, whether it was indened or not thats a good thing

also i cried becuase the other pets formed a wall to protect Jiff, even if they didn't stand a chance against Nox they still tried, thats the part i liked
Well, I'm glad that my story created some emotion, but I wasn't intending for it to I guess. Despite what it might seem like, I don't really enjoy reading or writing about lots of death. A little here and there, as long as it's not just senseless, is ok with me.
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by sean21 »

lol ops i forgot to vote, i wanted to go with Kyria, looks like we have a tie
Shawn "hey."
Sean "greetings."
Alex "hi everyone ^_^"
Justin "wazz'up dudes."
David "i hope it rains today."
Shawn "this is my loving family, sort of speak."
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by JeffCvt »

Ok, the vote is:

Kyria and Danny: 2
Max and Marvin: 2

It's about 24 hours or so until the end of the voting period. If you haven't voted, do so now. I will make a post once the time is up and the decision has been made.
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by 0404 »

I can change the whole story mwahhhahahah :twisted:
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by MapleRatty »

I got caugt up on this story.. and it is AWESOME! Very good. I vote for option 1! Revenge is always better!
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by Almost_Alice »

Oh! So Nox lives! Well that makes me feel better.

Danny? Hmm... I guess I need to re-read some chapters, I have no idea who that is.

But I'm curious to see how the plot with Jiff and his student will develope.
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by JeffCvt »

Almost_Alice wrote:Danny? Hmm... I guess I need to re-read some chapters, I have no idea who that is.
Is that a vote? I'm not really sure. It doesn't seem like one, so until you let me know, I'm going to have to ignore it.
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by SilentPrincess828 »

JeffCvt wrote:
Almost_Alice wrote:Danny? Hmm... I guess I need to re-read some chapters, I have no idea who that is.
Is that a vote? I'm not really sure. It doesn't seem like one, so until you let me know, I'm going to have to ignore it.
Knowing Arlice, that probably is a vote. I'm just saying since she probably won't be on again until tomorrow. I vote for the haunted house (if the vote's even still going on I have no idea.)
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by JeffCvt »

Yes, votes still going on.

So, including Arlice, the count is...

Kyria and Danny: 45
Max and Marvin: 3

About 4 hours left before I cut it off.


EDIT: Received a vote via PM, so I decided to update it here.
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by JeffCvt »

Alright, voting is over.

The final count:
Kyria gets back at Danny in her own way:5
Max re-challenges Marvin to spend a night in the haunted house:3

So, the next part that I put up will be about Kyria getting back at Danny for using her to make his Ex-girlfriend jealous. And it probably won't be pretty.

I don't know when I will have this up. Both ideas were pretty rough, all I have in my head right now is probably the first few sentences, a general idea of how the story will go, and not much else.

However, during this little break in my writing, I did come up with an idea for a story with Stealer. And I can't wait to get that one out. But I need to write it at night, next to a campfire. So... might not have that one for a while.
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by SilentPrincess828 »

JeffCvt wrote:But I need to write it at night, next to a campfire. So... might not have that one for a while.
Lol, what? I could have Ben take you out camping, he and his pals go quite often. If you can handle the crazy that is. :lol:
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by JeffCvt »

Alright, here is is. My first attempt at something that is supposed to be funny.


Enjoy

Kyria shut the front door to her house and started to walk down the sidewalk.

Today is the day Danny will wish that he never used me to get back together with his ex-girlfriend. I’ll teach him to call my friends stupid.

Kyria was walking to Heathcliffs. There wasn’t much going on, but that wasn’t unusual at 10:00 in the morning.

After the incident in the park, Kyria had quickly made friends with some of the neighborhood cats, and one of them just happened to hear that Danny was bringing his girlfriend to Heathcliffs tonight.

And one of her other friends just happened to work at Heathcliffs and was willing to help her get back at Danny.

It was all prefect. By the end of the night, Danny won’t have any idea what hit him. There was only one problem though.

Kyria didn’t have any ideas on how to do this…

As she walked into the fenced off area that was Heathcliffs , she nearly ran into Max, who was on his way out holding two giant bags of trash.

“Excuse me.” Max said.

“Max, what are you doing here so early?”

Max smiled his signature ‘I’m up to something’ grin. “I just challenged Marvin to spend a night in the haunted house. The winner is the one who stays in all night. I need these two bags of garbage for my plan to scare him out. We did this a few years ago, but for reasons that I would rather not go into, I lost. But I’m going to be sure to win this time.”

Kyria was confused about something. “Why did you come here to get garbage? Couldn’t you just get it from your house?”

“I could, but that’s just regular garbage. This is garbage of a place that serves garbage.”

Kyria took a step back and seemed to think for a second. “You know, I would have never thought of that.”

That seemed to boost Max’s ego. “Thanks, but I have to go now. I have a lot of setting up to do.” Max looked over his shoulder and yelled “Thanks Talia!”

“You’re welcome!” Someone from the kitchen area yelled.

Max walked away, determined to whatever it was that he was doing.

Kyria walked into the kitchen area, which was really just a place to sort the trash that came in. She immediately saw a light grey cat with slightly darker grey stripes down her entire back and tail.

“Hey Talia!” Kyria said.

Talia looked behind her and saw that Kyria was there. She put down the stack of menus that she had been getting ready for that night and said “Hey Kyria, are you ready to start setting up to get back at Danny?”

“I’m more than ready. Except for one small thing.”

Talia was worried. “What small thing?”

Kyria seemed to be kind of embarrassed as she said “Well, it’s just that I can’t think of anything to do to him…”

“Oh, is that all!” Talia almost laughed. “Don’t worry about that, I can help you come up with something.”

Suddenly, Max poked his head in the opening in the fence that lead to the kitchen. “Oh, I forgot to ask you Talia, do you happen to have fifty-eight unsharpened pencils?”

“Ummm… I don’t think so. Sorry Max.”

“Aw shoot. Maybe I can use that ball of yarn I found instead.” He said as he walked away.

Kyria was about to ask something when Talia said “I agreed that he could have anything that came through here that isn’t edible. We’ll probably see him a lot today.”

“That explains it.” Kyria stated. “Do you know how he plans on using this stuff to scare someone?”

“Nope, I think he’s just making it up as he goes along. But enough about him, we need to come up with something to do to Danny. We can’t let the fact that we know he’ coming here tonight go to waste.”

“You’re right.” Kyria started to think. “What would be fitting to do to him? What if we were to… or maybe…” Kyria’s face lit up. “I got it!”

-----

An hour later


“Do you think the rubber band will be powerful enough?” Talia asked.

“Of course!!” Kyria exclaimed. “When Danny comes, you’ll seat him here, at this crate. Then when you bring his food here, you put it right here on this hidden arm. I’ll be waiting right over there, out of sight, and then I’ll pull the hidden string. The rubber band will pull and force the arm to swing up, pushing the lid full of food into his face!”

“I don’t know…” Talia seemed doubtful. “Let’s see what happens when we test it.”

“Alright.” Kyria said as she put one of the tin garbage lids that the food was served in on the device. Then she grabbed the string. “Ok, three, two, one!” She pulled the string.

Nothing happened. The rubber band was too weak.

Talia was about to say something when Max stuck his head out of the kitchen and yelled “Hey Talia, I’m going to take some of these tin cans! I’m also looking for either a deflated football or ten gallons of ice-cream, whichever one I can find first. Do you know where I can fine either of those?”

“Nope, sorry Max! Good luck finding them though!”

Max’s head disappeared back into the kitchen area.

“He’s sure going to town, huh?” Kyria asked.

Talia snickered. “I think it’s a pride thing for him. He lost the last one so now he wants to win at all costs. I don’t know, guys can be so weird.”

Kyria looked back down at her failed attempt at revenge. “I guess we need to try something else.”

-----

Three hours and several failed ideas later


“Anything else Kyria?”

“Hmmm… Maybe we could drop something on him, like a bucket of water. That would be good.”

Talia frowned. “Except we don’t have a roof to hang it from. And setting up a ladder behind him might be just a little too obvious.”

Kyria’s face turned red. “Oh, right.”

They both watched Max walk by the entrance. He was carrying an empty fish bowl and what seemed to be a squeaky bone. Probably one of Bino’s.

“What’s with all this stuff he’s been collecting!?” Talia exclaimed. “He’s walked by here with toilet paper, a bowling ball, an old suitcase full of instant pudding, and that’s just some of the stuff we saw him with! Is he building something to scare Marvin of starting a collection of random things, because I can’t tell.”

“Yea.” Kyria just kind of said. She wasn’t really paying attention.

“Don’t worry, we’ll think of something.” Talia said reassuringly.

Kyria snapped back to reality. “Oh, no. That’s not it. I mean, the stuff we’ve been thinking of have all been like pranks. Food in his face, launching mayonnaise filled balloons at him, an electrified fork. They would have been great ideas if we could have gotten them to work, but I want to do more than just humiliate him for a night. I want to do something like… like…”

You could almost see the light bulb go off above Kyria’s head. “That’s it!”

“What’s it?” Talia asked, obviously not following Kyria’s train of thought.

“The perfect way for me to get back at Danny!” Kyria said, still excited.

“Are you going to tell me?” Talia asked impatiently.

Kyria whispered her idea in Talia’s ear. When she was done, Talia said “Oh my gosh! That is perfect! And we don’t need to set anything up for it either! It’s full proof!”

The two cats talked excitedly to each other about the plan until Kyria had to go back to her house to get ready for later that night.

This is going to be perfect. Kyria thought as she walked into her room and started to brush her fur.

-----

That night at Heathcliffs


“Seating for two please.” Danny said.

Danny was a cat that was black on his back, tail, and top of his head. We white on his legs, arms, torso, and face. The cat he was with was a calico, mostly tan with a lot of white and black all over, like splattered paint.

Talia escorted them to a crate right in the middle of the restaurant. One that could be seen by everyone who was eating.

They both sat down and started talking, not aware what was about to happen. Talia walked back to the kitchen area and told a mouse that was waiting to go tell Kyria, who was waiting right around the corner, that Danny had arrived.

Then Talia went out to go watch the show. It was going to be a good one.

Kyria walked in, alone, just like she was coming in to have something to eat. She looked around a little bit, then gasped when she saw Danny. Of course, she already knew right where Danny was going to be. She was doing a great job of acting right now.

Kyria stormed up behind Danny and yelled “What are you doing here with HER!?”

Danny nearly fell out of his seat while trying to stand up. He got up and just stared at Kyria, wondering what she was yelling about.

“Who is this?!” Kyria yelled “Don’t tell me this is the cat that dumped you right before we started dating!”

“I- Uh- Umm…” Danny had no idea what to say, he didn’t even know what was going on.

“Oh my gosh, she is!!” Kyria continued screaming.

By this point, the entire restaurant was staring at the scene that was going on.

“Not only do you cheat on me, but with the same cat that you called a horrible witch!”

“He called me what!?” the calico screamed as she jumped out of her seat. “You said that you dumped her! You’re both still together?!”

“We were together until about ten seconds ago.” Kyria said to the calico. “That cheating, back-stabbing excuse for a boyfriend is all yours.”

“Wait, what?” Danny asked, still confused.

“I don’t think so.” The calico said as she walked up to Danny.

Instead of saying anything, she slapped him across the face, then kicked him in a rather… sensitive area.

Then she stormed out, muttering some very un-PG13 things about Danny.

Talia walked up to where Kyria and Danny were, then yelled “It’s ok everyone! You can go back to your dinner, I’ll handle everything now!”

As everyone started eating again, Danny, who had fallen over in pain after being kicked, asked “What just happened?” as he stood up.

Kyria smiled and said quiet enough that only Danny could hear “What just happened is what happens when you call me gullible and stupid. Good luck ever getting another girlfriend again.”

Danny was obviously angry. “Why- You! I’ll get you for this!” He stomped as he went out of the restaurant. Right after he got out the entrance, he turned around and started yelling “Do you hear me Kyria!? I will get you! You better watch your back or I’ll…”

As Danny continued yelling, Talia thought she heard screaming. “Do you hear that?” She asked Kyria.

“You mean something besides Danny, I don’t think- Oh! I hear it now.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!”

All of the sudden, Marvin came out of nowhere and ran straight into Danny, knocking him over. He was in some kind of hysterical panic, probably caused by fear. Marvin stood right back up and continued running down the street, screaming.

“Was that Marvin?” Kyria asked.

“That was.” Talia said. “It’s not even 10:00 yet and Max already managed to scare him out of the house. I don’t know what he did with all of that stuff, but he sure knew what he was doing.”

Danny stood back up. “Alright Kyria, you win. I’m not sure how you managed to arrange a screaming cat to plow into me once I left the restaurant, but I’ll leave you alone.”

Kyria snickered. “Do you think I should tell him I had nothing to do with that?” she quietly asked Talia.

“Nah. I don’t think he’ll be messing with anyone ever again anyway.”

END


Ok, there it is. Hopefully you all laughed at some point. Or at least found it entertaining.

Due to the fact I don't know when I'll be able to see SilentPrincess to give her a hard copy to fix, I won't be giving her any credit for reviewing anything for most of the summer probably.
I guess I'll have to start doing that myself.

Oh, and good news, the next update is going to to be that story with Stealer that I said I needed to write next to a campfire. I'm almost finished my handwritten notes, and I could probably finish it by tomorrow if I really pushed myself. I'm probably NOT going to push myself seeing that I just updated today, so expect it in a few days.
Last edited by JeffCvt on Thu Jun 07, 2012 6:33 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by MapleRatty »

This is really funny! Cant wait for the Stealer part!
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by copper »

Well, that was very good reading, I must say! A bit tongue in cheek, but thoroughly enjoyable. :D
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by legendario13 »

Really good, It helps me really much to understand the parts i was confussed on

Thank you! and Waiting...
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by JeffCvt »

copper wrote: A bit tongue in cheek
That's what I was kind of going for in this update. Glad to see it was.
legendario13 wrote:It helps me really much to understand the parts i was confussed on
I'm glad that it did. I hope that by this point there isn't much confusion left from my not-so-good writing.


And also, the update with Stealer that I'm doing next isn't going to be a funny one.

It's going to take a look into Stealer's girlfriend, Sandy, and how they became a couple before she dumped him.
The main purpose of it is to give some insight into the kind of relationship they had and to also help develop Stealer's personality some, mainly because I haven't really done that with him at all. To me he's just been... there.
So everyone should be looking forward to that. :)
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by legendario13 »

JeffCvt wrote:So everyone should be looking forward to that. :)
You can bet i do :!:
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by JeffCvt »

Alright, just one note. In this part, I refer to Stealer's and Sandy's owners as just that, owners.
I do not refer to them as parents because I do bring up Sandy's real father, and I wanted to prevent any possible confusion.
Sandy and Stealer do look at their owners as parents, just like most pets in the HP universe do.


Enjoy

Stealer sat in the clearing in the woods.

He was watching a small bonfire that he had started.

As the very last light of day went away, the sounds of night came alive.

Crickets chirping.

Toads croaking.

The rustling of the leaves on the trees as the wind blew threw them.

It was all strangely calming.

Stealer listened to the popping and crackling of the fire as he moved the stump that he had been sitting on closer. It was getting cold out, and the fire provided warmth.

Just like she used to.

It had been a while since Sandy dumped him. Ever since the crises with Jiff and Nox had ended, she was the only thing on his mind. The only thing he could think about.

How close they had been, how sure he had been that they would spend the rest of their lives together. How broken he had felt after she had left him.

Stealer threw a few more sticks on the fire. It was staring to really get cold now that sun was totally down.

Some sparks flew up into the air as Stealer threw the sticks on.

As they disappeared into the night air, Stealer remembered the first time that he and Sandy ever met.

-----

It was about four years ago. Stealer had just moved to a new town with his two owners.

He hadn’t been too keen on the idea of moving, mainly because he had trouble making new friends. It was just something that he wasn’t good at.

He had never been an extremely social dog, he made a few friends and kept them. He never really had more than one or two really good friends at a time. While he would talk to other pets and socialize a little, rarely to the point of making another “good” friend.
So moving away from everyone that he had ever known was hard for him.

But when he got to the new town, he tried to go out and get to know the local dogs. And he did get to know a few in a couple days. Not to the point that he considered them close friends, but enough that he would go and hang out or play in the park with them.

About two weeks after moving in, one of the dogs Stealer knew decided that they should go to the park and play some Frisbee. Everyone agreed, and pretty soon they were all laughing and playing in the local park.

One of the dogs threw the Frisbee to Stealer, but it went a little too high and it sailed right over his head. As Stealer ran to go get it, he accidently ran into a dog that was just walking through the park.

Right before he ran into her, Stealer looked and noticed that she was a Labrador retriever. Not only that, but she was the most beautiful shade of gold that had ever existed.

Well, in Stealer’s opinion anyway.

“OOF!” She yelled as Stealer ran into her, knocking her down.

He was so embarrassed. How could he have just run into the most beautiful dog he had ever seen? Not only that, how could he have knocked her down?

“I’m so sorry!” Stealer said as he helped her back up.

“It’s alright.” She said as she brushed herself off. “I should have watched where I was going.” She looked at him and said “I don’t think I’ve seen you before. Are you new here?”

Stealer blushed a little. Why was he blushing? “Uh, yes I am. My name is Stealer. We only moved in about two weeks ago.”

“Well, nice to meet you Stealer. My name is Sandy; I’m kind of new here myself. I only came about a month ago.”

Was she blushing too? Stealer couldn’t tell, but it looked like she was.

Sandy continued. “Listen, I don’t have anything to do right now, would you like to maybe… come over to my house and talk? I’m not that good at making new friends.”

Stealer’s heart skipped a beat at the thought of going over to her house.

“Why, yes! I would!” He nearly yelled.

Sandy giggled a little, and they went to her house.

When they got there, Stealer introduced himself to Sandy’s owners and they both went up to her room.

They just simply talked for the rest of the day. Nothing else, it turned out that they had a lot in common with each other. Stealer didn’t know why, but this made him feel safe with her. This was strange for him, he felt even closer to her than he did with his closest friend before he moved, and he had only known Sandy for half a day at this point.

By the end of the day, they were both close friends. Closer than most friends in the neighborhood, but just that. Friends.

There was only one thing that they weren’t open to each other about, and that was their feelings toward each other.

While Stealer knew that he was in love with Sandy, and was pretty sure that she loved him, he was afraid of the commitment of becoming her boyfriend.

He wasn’t ready for it yet, and he knew it.

For that reason, he settled for simply being her closest friend. Closer than most couples could ever be, but friends just the same.

-----

Stealer threw a stick on the fire.

How could he have been so blind?

They had been so close, close enough that he would have done anything for her. And that was even before they became a couple.

Stealer looked up at the night sky and saw all of the stars, sparkling like white sparks in the night sky.

They were beautiful. There were so many of them, more than could probably ever be counted.

Stealer wondered if that is how they would have looked the night that he and Sandy became more than just friends.

He poked the fire with a stick, causing more sparks to fly into the air.

-----

It was about a year after Stealer had moved into the new town.

Sandy and him were walking in the park, something that they did quite often. Not as a couple, they weren’t one yet. Just as close friends.

The sky was dark from cloud cover, but neither of them seemed to mind. If it rained, then it rained. They got wet. Big deal, they would eventually dry off.

As they walked through the park, they talked. Not about anything serious, just some lighthearted conversation.

The walk had been going fine, but then Sandy’s cell phone rang. That wasn’t uncommon. Probably just one of her owners calling to check up on her, or remind her that dinner was in thirty minutes.

But not this time.

“Hello? Oh, hey dad. Why do you sound so- Don’t get upset when you tell me what?”

Sandy said nothing as her dad gave her the news that he had called to tell her.

Stealer became concerned when Sandy didn’t say anything back. “Sandy, what’s wrong? Are you ok?”

Rain started to fall from the sky. Sandy dropped her phone as she started to run to her house.

Stealer, not knowing what had just happened, just that something had made Sandy very upset, picked up her phone and ran after her.


Sandy burst into her house, dripping wet from the rain. She looked at her owners who had been waiting for her. They simply looked back at her with a kind of sadness, one that said ‘I wish it wasn’t true, but it is.’

Sandy started crying and ran upstairs to her room, still dripping wet.

Stealer came in next. He looked and saw the look on Sandy’s owners faces, and knew that something was wrong.

Before he could ask, they said “Sandy’s… biological father was just killed. He was hit by a drunk driver.”

Stealer knew what this meant. Sandy was very close to her real father, she had always been. He had been there to help raise her as a pup, unlike a lot of pets where the mother is strictly the one to raise the litter.

She always called him, at least once a week. Her father was probably the one living being in the world that she was closer to than Stealer.

And he had just been killed.

“Do you mind if I grab a towel from the bathroom and try to go calm her down?” Stealer asked.

Both of Sandy’s owners simply nodded and went to go sit down in the living room.

Stealer got a fresh towel from the bathroom and went up to Sandy’s room.


Stealer walked into her room and saw her sitting in the middle of the floor, crying.

He walked up and put the towel around her shoulders, then sat in front of her and gave her a hug. The time for words would come, but not right now.

They both stayed that way for the next hour. Stealer hugging Sandy as she cried.

Eventually, through her sobs, Sandy said “S-Stealer?”

“Yes?” Stealer asked with as much understanding as he could put into his voice.

“Y-You know how close I was to my d-dad, right?”

“You were very close. You always called him, and he was not just your father, but your closest friend.” Stealer’s voice was soft and comforting, almost like he had done this before.

Sandy was still sobbing. “W-We last talked th-three days ago. W-We had an a-argument. I can’t even remember what it was about. And now I-I can’t even tell him that I’m s-sorry!”

“It’s alright.” Stealer said, still hugging her. “He knows that you love him. Nothing would have ever made him think different. Don’t worry, everything is going to be ok. It’s going to be just fine.”

*Sniff* “Promise me Stealer, Promise me that.”

Stealer hugged her even tighter. “I promise that everything is going to be fine from now on.”

She hugged him back. “I don’t ever want to lose anyone ever again. I-I don’t want to lose you. P-promise me that you’ll never leave me. Please promise me that.”

Stealer stopped hugging her.

He looked her straight in the eyes and said “I’ll never leave you. We’ll stay together forever.” Then hugged her again, as if to prove that he meant what he said.

And they stayed like that the entire night, eventually falling asleep in each other’s arms.

While they had not said anything specifically about being a couple, Stealer knew that after that day, they were closer than any definition of friend that had ever existed.

Nothing would ever tear them apart. Ever.

Well, that’s what Stealer thought anyway.

-----

Stealer looked at the fire. It had died down to nothing more than a few coals now.

He realized how cold it was without an open flame. But at the same time, it felt nice.

Stealer touched the grass. It had become damp from the cold night.

He once again listened to the sounds of the night, to the sizzling of the dying fire. He thought about putting some sticks on it and trying to get a flame again, but decided not to. It was time to head back.

He kicked some dirt on the remaining coals to put them out. Once he was sure the fire was completely done, he grabbed the flashlight that he had brought with him and started to walk toward Babylon Gardens.

As he walked, Stealer wondered where he had been wrong.

He Sandy and had been so close that the term ‘boyfriend’ and ‘girlfriend’ didn’t even come close to describing the kind of bond they had. They were much closer than anyone could have resized. They simply described each other as boyfriend or girlfriend because it was easier that way.

Everyone in town could see that they were close, but only their owners could see how close they really were.

Only there owners knew how much time they would spend in each other’s rooms, just talking. Or how they would even look at each other when no one else was around.

Nearly every night, one of them would spend the night at the other’s house. It even got to the point that they didn’t have to ask for permission. They just could, it was like they were a part of the family.

Stealer even remembered over hearing his owners on the phone with Sandy’s owners. They were talking about possibly letting them have puppies. Puppies!

And Sandy’s owners seemed to agree that it was a good idea!

Stealer sighed as he continued to walk through the woods. He had overheard that conversation only about a week before they left to go visit Kansas.

The same trip that when they left, Sandy dumped Stealer right before the car pulled out.

Dumped.

Another word he used because it was easier. In reality, a better word would probably be something like ‘divorced.’

No. Even divorced doesn’t come close with how close they had been.

And she had done it so she could be with one of his other friends!

Stealer never even remembered seeing Sandy talking to that friend!

Stealer stopped walking. He sat down, his back supported by the nearest tree, and cried.

He had it all! The perfect mate, owners who understood them both, even a litter was not out of the question!

And now he had nothing.

When Sandy broke his heart, she broke his will to ever have another relationship again.

Stealer simply sat in the woods, crying much like Sandy did the night that her father was killed.

Except, there was no one to come and comfort him.

END


And there it is.
Last edited by JeffCvt on Sat Jun 09, 2012 2:45 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by legendario13 »

Not a nice story and yet Great man, Not to put some more torns on Stealer pain but, theres gona be more of this right?
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by Almost_Alice »

Aww... poor Stealer. :cry:
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by JeffCvt »

legendario13 wrote:theres gona be more of this right?
More to do with Stealer's broken heart, yes.

While I haven't decided what exactly I'm going to do yet, I have 2 or 3 ideas ready. And lets just say that no matter what I decide to use, you will all probably be saying
Almost_Alice wrote:Aww... poor Stealer. :cry:
And I don't know if this is going to have a happy or sad ending yet, but I do plan on doing a little more with Stealer before I before I bring the major plot with Jiff and his student back in. In a big way too, with the introduction of a new character that is going to be totally kick-butt. Someone that you all might be familiar with...
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by JeffCvt »

Alright everyone, I'm working on the next part. I have a case of writer's block right now, but I think I'm on the verge of breaking through.

So in the meantime, enjoy this comic that Scratch made me for helping him out with something.
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(Be sure to go read his comic here.)

Also, using one of the images from this awesome comic, I made a new banner for my fic.
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If you would like to show your support for my fic by putting this in your signature, I will be posting this and my other one up in the first post.

In the meantime, I will be writing the next part and I hope that it will be out soon.
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by legendario13 »

Great, Great!

And nice comic, and banner, but.... i dun know how to put it on my sign..
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by 0404 »

ain't that sweet?
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Re: Burning Desire: The Power Within

Post by copper »

I love the comic. Bino is always funny when he is flustered! :lol:

Nice update. A few spelling issues near the end though.

Always great with the description. Love how you had the fire dying down slowly as the memory progressed. Long memory it seems.
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