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is it too dark?? 
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Post is it too dark??
// Hi there this is my first fanfic and my first try to write something.. I knew housepets! Since 2009 an this is the first time I try to think with my imagination.. this supposed to be pg-13 but I will try to keep it low.. have fun~~~

“….” = this means that the person is talking
‘…..’ = this means that person is thingking

Chapter 0
‘ How did this happened…?,’ he keep repeating that question many times now…
‘ i didn’t even knew that this could happened, it supposed to be a nomal day, no sadness, no tears, no regret.. nothing … just normal. ‘
There’s stood a male brown dog silently looking down trough his window, a female purple cat with fish tag that keep crying for forgiveness, a female black cat with Ankh tag that keep reassuring the other cat, a female small dog with horus eye’s tag looking the scene with confused expression.

He didn’t know what to do, he didn’t know how to handle this situation, he supposed to be the happiest dog in the Babylon neighborhood, but now he didn’t feel anything, with dead eye’s looking from his window the purple cat still crying for forgiveness, once again he supposed to run from his room and be there for his friend, best friend, more than friend his family….. yet now…. He still stand there, not a single movement, he’s comfused, why didn’t he do something…

Oh yeah…….. he feels nothing..

it started when he finnaly face the reality.. such a cruel reality…. He didn’t even want to know… he just wanted to be ignorance.. to be carefree… to be….. loved…

well…. It sucks…. This is the reality…

that time…. The temple….. the break up…. The misunderstanding…. And now this….

Can it get worse from this ?…. He clearly remembered that it was fine… it was fine… it’s not her fault she didn’t know…. She just happened to be there at the wrong time

‘ it just a big misunderstanding.. it’s okay.. it’s fine… so please just stop.. it’s okay.. it’s not your fault… ’

But in his heart… IT WAS NOT FINE

‘ Oh god….. someone just please make it stop…. Just stop…. JUST…… MAKE…… HER…… STOP…!!!!!!!!!! ‘

/// hey…. How was it… is it bad?? Please give me some advice.. if this is too dark I’m going to stop right here… thank you..


Wed Apr 04, 2018 11:45 am
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Post Re: is it too dark??
As were not really given much of a clue towards context (most I can think of is Max breaking up with Grape), I'm going to have to withhold any judgement. Though you at least got my curiosity piqued, so I'm hoping the next update will bring answers.

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Wed Apr 04, 2018 2:32 pm
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Post Re: is it too dark??
The opening is intense and abrupt and needs context. Maybe in the next iteration, you could have the narrator reflect on some back story. That would slow things down a bit and lay the ground for further development.

Also, you might think about using italic font for thinking....
Moe said nothing. "I'm not sure how I feel about that" went through his brain.

It's certainly not a cheery start but it grabs attention. Some fanfics do have pretty grim strands so that needn't stop you.

Regards.


Wed Apr 04, 2018 4:08 pm
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Post Re: is it too dark??
The pacing is much much too fast for my liking, we have no context for anything, and the grammar is all over the place.

Dark isn't an issue when I don't even know what's going on.

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Wed Apr 04, 2018 4:41 pm
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Post Re: is it too dark??
thank you so much for the reply... i will try my best to correct some and not to put much of the spacing.. thank you again.... :D


Wed Apr 04, 2018 9:17 pm
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Post Re: is it too dark??
Hey guys thank you so much for the suggestion you all giving me.. so this is what i did
For someone thinking i’m using italic.. thank you NHWestoN
when pacing i tried not to fast this time.. ( i hope ) thank you Buster
and i’m very sorry about my grammar because english is not my native language i’m form indonesian so “ satu kata dari english menjadi 3 arti dalam bahasa kami “ so very sorry you guys..

Enjoy...
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Chapter 1
It was just an ordinary day, the sound of canines chasing around with another, the bird are singing, the sound of grape sleeping on the couch after last night date with max, but someone can’t sleep, not only last night but many night before, it make him feel anxious, it make him feel vulnerable, because every night it’s always that dreams, a nightmares to be precise. Peanut a brown male dog feel a little bit cranky because of that, a nightmares that always repeat everytime he asleep, a despair, a hollow, an emptiness. he died, Falling down from a pit trap from the adventure to the temple with max,grape,and res. Not only that.. oh.. it get worse he saw something that making him woke up with scream every night... all of his friends lifeless body.. at first in that dream he yelled for help asking someone or anyone to help them, but he’s replied was emptyness he walk slowly trough his friends lifeless body until he met a certain cat. A purple cat.... grape.... just sprawled againts the dirt.. his body tremble for what his saw.. then when he look at her face, he met an empty eyes... her yellow eyes that usually give him safety, a warm place, the eyes that he loved now empty.... and that when he reached his limit.... he screams.... until he woke up in the middle of the night... that was the third nighmare... grape could hear his scream from her room so like what friend... beast friend... more than friend can do, be there for him.. she asked what happend but his replied was nothing.. just nothing... this is the first and the last time grape heard his scream because everynight max always take her out for a date.. at first she declined beacuse her friend needed her, but from there something that peanut never do... one thing that he can never do to grape....lied .... he heard she declined the date because of him so he just tell her that he was fine... it was only a bad dream it only happend one time.... oh.. what a sweet lie... he didn’t tell the first and the second dream he had... but because of his first lied.. grape noticed it with a bad feeling she agreed with the date.... of course that was one week ago... the dreams keep repeating it self... his dead... lifeless body... and then last night the monster.....
“dear god is it going to stop ?” he asked himself...
but because of that he realize something.. something that can change around him.... but... he doesn’t want to change... he just want to be happy... just live a normal life like an ordinary dog... but this time he can’t think any of that... suddenly he heard a knock on his door.
“ peanut... are you awake ? ” his mom (owner) asked
“ eh... Oh yeah i’m awake mom be there in a sec “ he stands up from his bed and look at the mirror, his had dark spot under his eyes. “ ughh... i can’t let them see this, well i just need to come up with an excuse like playing games until late night or something like that “ then he came down to the dining room, in there he meet his mom, jill sandwich.
“ peanut what happend ? why there’s a dark spot under your eyes ? “ she asked him
“ oh.. no mom i just played a game until late night and didn’t see the time.. “ he lied to her
Suddenly there’s a reply beside the dining table, “ well if that’s what keeping you awake i can confiscated them and i bet that will make you sleep.” There a man reading a newspaper with a coffe beside him, his dad, earl sandwich.
“ ehm... i think there’s no need for that.. i can just put them somewhere but not in my room dad “ peanut nervous replied, if his game confiscated he can’t keep making excuse for what really happend.
“ well please keep in mind that you need to sleep so that you can play for the rest of this beautifull day.. now.. please go and wake up grape the breakfast will be here in 5 minutes “ his mom replied
“ okay mom.... beautifull day ? i wish i could enjoy that “ with that he go to the living room and started to wake up the beast...
“ hey grape.. wake up... breakfast is going to be ready.. “ with his hand touching her shoulder she woke up
“ oh... morning peanut... are you okay ? “ grape looked at him with a question look
“ morning grape... what do you mean grape ? “ he asked
“ you have a dark spot under your eyes.. usually you wake me up with a scream.. and now you only wake me up with your hand touching my shoulder and with normal voice.. something definitely wrong.. so tell what’s wrong ? “ she asked him with worried eyes, he knows that he can’t keep lying to her.. it will definitely can’t get pass trough her.
“ i may or may not have another bad dream “ he sheepishly replied
“ again ? how many times have you got a bad dreams ? “ she worriedly asked him
“ it’s my second dream grape.. honest.. it’s okay it was about a game full of zombie that i played yesterday... the walking dead always gives me a creep “ he sweetly lie trough her, well not completly a lie.
“ then don’t play that game, just play a classic mario or something “ she answered him
“ okay grape i promise.. oh yeah after this i need to go to tarot house “ he remembered something from this morning
“ oh for what ? asking her for another pararel universe date ? “ she grinned at him
“ uhm... something like that “ he replied
“ well, be careful i don’t want you to end up like last time “ she clearly remembered the event when she and max go to double date with peanut and tarot, that didn’t go to well
“ okay grape i’ll be carefull “, oh peanut is going to tarot house but not for a date but something is going to change whether he likes it or not
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Ehm.. yeah this is what i got.. so any opinion with this case? I’ll try to improvise more and more so that i can make you all understand what is happening in this story.. thank you have a nice day...


Sat Apr 07, 2018 3:14 am
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Post Re: is it too dark??
If you can't do the editing yourself because of a language barrier, you could always ask for help.

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Sat Apr 07, 2018 7:24 am
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Post Re: is it too dark??
Is it okay for me to do that?? I don't want to burden someone because of my selfishness


Sat Apr 07, 2018 9:09 am
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Post Re: is it too dark??
Selfish? Even among fanfic communities there are as many writers with editors as without, and if you need one you need one.

No harm in asking for help. Just be polite about it and if they say no, drop it don't push.

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Sat Apr 07, 2018 1:43 pm
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Post Re: is it too dark??
hey guys so…. In this past days I got help from my teacher to help me with the grammar but could you guys kindly fix witch sentence or part that needed to be fix ? thank you

Chapter 2
D'Angelo house ---
“ Sabrina.? ” a Pomeranian dog called her apprentice as she emerged from her room.
“ What is it, Tarot ? “ the black cat answered while she was focusing on her meditation
“ Could you open the door for Peanut later? I need to go to other interdimensional mirror, the spirit told me that they sensed a disturbing channel around there. “ as Tarot was getting ready for her travel, she noticed her apprentice expression. “ What is it Sabrina, is something on your mind? “.
Sabrina hesitated to ask this question but it really bothered her, “ Tarot, this may seem a weird question, but, what is Peanut to you ? ”.
The question surprised Tarot. “ Wha... of course he’s my boyfriend what else? “
Sabrina began to doubt that. “ Are you sure? “
Tarot was looking at her with a questioning look. “ What are you talking about? “
Sabrina explained “ Tarot, this may seem weird but when was the last time you went to another dimension with Peanut or at least talk about it? “
Tarot began to think. “When you put it that way... “
Sabrina continued “ Tarot... when we went to that temple stopping Keene from getting the mana, we left Peanut without a second thought, it bothered him so greatly that he didn’t listen to your warning, after you said sorry you left him again, and I remembered you said some excuses to him but he said that you always said the same excuse, so I will ask you again Tarot do you really have feeling for him ? “
Tarot just looked at her with bewildered expression “ I... I don’t... I really don't know when me and dragon became his girlfriend the one that has a crush is mostly dragon, i though when i’m going to start dating him i will feel something like dragon, i do but is not strong enough, i really want this to work between me and Peanut but how can you focus on that feeling when the world is at stake ? i don’t want to choose between saving the world or him. “
Sabrina only looked at her then she asked “ Tarot what happens if you must make that choice? What will you do? “
Tarot only kept silent until she opened a portal “ I don’t want to think about that but I hope nothing will change between me and Peanut “ and then she jumped trough the portal
Sabrina started to get up from her position and startes making preparations for the upcoming guest “ I hope too Tarot... I really do “

Celestial Plains—
He felt something, something was very wrong. Kitsune, a nine tail Celestials fox, felt something was definitely wrong. It bothered him so much that it changed his playful and sly faces to a serious dead-looking one. If Pete and Dragon saw this they would have cold sweats. One thing that you could notice from Kitsune that every time the situation got worse, he always brushed it off with his playfulness. But now something was coming, something big, maybe. He looked at the table, the board game, the board that could control a living being whenever the three of them wanted to play. Now that Dragon and Pete had been reincarnated, the board now seemed useless. It was not that he didn’t enjoy playing this game, but he always thought a way to end the game. Now with the help from former human ‘Joel’ who turned into a dog ‘king’, the games finally reached its ends. Sometimes he missed Dragon and Pete with their wits against each other but a game always needed to put into an end. Suddenly a soft female voice could be heard across the table.
“ non tam Salve iterum Kitsune sit noscere “ a beautiful female white wolf came to the other side of Kitsune, this clearly surprised Kitsune.

“ Well, it is nice to meet you too Luna or should I say Goddes of the moon “ the white wolf only smiled at that, with her clear blue eyes like ocean looked straight into Kitsune eyes. It made Kitsune slightly tremble.

Kitsune started to ask “ May I ask why the goddess of wolves came to see this humble fox ? “ the wolf started to speak but was interrupted again by Kitsune “ May the goddess speak in this language so that I can cooperate fully? “

Luna started to giggle “ Oh my, I’m so sorry Kitsune. It’s been a while since the last time I spoke in this language “ then she walked to Kitsune and started to explain “ I’m so sorry for my unannounced arrival but I have an urgent news for you and the other demigods but where are the others ? Usually, you and the two of them, the dragon and the gryphon, play together “ she looked the other side of table but didn’t sense the presence of those two.

Kitsune responded “ I’m sorry Luna but the other two have been reincarnated for losing to this game, but what urgent news may I ask? “

Luna looked kinda surprised “ Oh my.. So the game is already ended? Thank god for that. Oh Yeah... Kitsune this may seem odd but please be careful I have a feeling that my ex-mate is starting to move but I can’t seem to figured out what he is planning to do “

With that, Kitsune face started to become pale “ What do you mean Luna ? Do you mean that he wants to do something ? What does he want ? What does that monster want? “

Luna glared at him and he started to trembled “ JUST BECAUSE HE’S THE SON OF LOKI THAT DOESN’T MEAN YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO CALL HIM THAT.. DON’T BE SUCH A HYPOCRITE. DO YOU EVEN SEE WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR SO- CALLED THE BOARD GAMES ?“ the sound of Luna’s anger made Kitsune knees become limp. “ REMEMBER THIS DEMI GOD JUST BECAUSE YOU HAVE A POWER THAT DOESN’T MEAN YOU HAVE MORE POWER OVER ALL THE IMMORTAL BEING, SO HEED MY WARNING AND SPREAD THE WORD THAT THE GOD OF DESTRUCTION IS ON THE MOVE “ with that the white wolf disappeared, and the only things on Kitsune’s mind was that he had to speak with Bahamut.

Babylon garden ---
Peanut just arrived in front of D’angelo house. Before he could knock the front door, Sabrina opened the door for him. “ Hey Peanut, if you need to see Tarot, you just missed her. So, if you want, you can come inside and wait for her “ Peanut only nodded his head and went inside the house. After he went inside, Sabrina ask him “ Do you want some tea while you are waiting for her, Peanut? “
Peanut only shook his head and answered “ No, thank you Sabrina. I just want to ask something from her. I just wait until she returns “, Sabrina led him to living room. When she and Peanut sat on the sofa she curiously asked “ What question do you want to ask, Peanut? “
Peanut only grimaced at that question, he started to rub his head “ I’m sorry Sabrina but this is kinda private, but don’t worry it’s not important “ he just grinned at that. Sabrina looked kinda worried about that. She just shrugged that feeling and just started chatting with him.
“ So, Peanut can I ask you something ? “ Peanut just nodded his head. “ How do you feel after we went through the temple? “ The only thing Peanut can think about that event was “ it’s horrible, thinking about that makes me sick like I want to puke every time I remember that place “, with a straight face Peanut only answered “ Actually, I kinda forget what really happened back there “ Sabrina face became alarmed when he said that. “ Are you okay Peanut ? Is there any head injury ? or maybe internal bleeding ? should we go see a doctor ? “ Sabrina started to panic, “Whoa.. whoa… whoa it’s okay Sabrina. I’m fine. I feel normal but I remembered that I came out from that place with no harm. I only forgot what happened inside the temple, really. So, take it easy “ with that, her body become relaxed “ So you forgot completely what happened inside the temple ? “ Peanut just shake his head “ Not at all. I only remembered just a piece, like we can change into something when we used a hat, I remembered rufus.. only like that “, With a worried sound Sabrina asked a question “ Do you remember what happened after we had saved you from the pit trap ? “.
That question made him remember, made him feel something that he didn’t like. Something that he usually never showed; anger. Suddenly, the air started to feel heavy, Sabrina started to sweat from her forehead as she saw something from Peanut. Something she didn’t think he even had, a dark aura started to emit around Peanut. His round blue eyes started to change. They shaped almost look like he was feral, with a sound almost like growling “ Yeah, I remember, I remember how you ditched us “ Sabrina started to tremble “ Peanut.. “ he continued “ Oh, I remember how you just left us with nothing but a piece of note.. “ Sabrina tried to say something “ Peanut, calm down. I know we should just tell you what happened but we were in a hurry and the world was at stake Peanut “ It only made Peanut furious “ Yeah the world was at stake and when you cannot share anything with us ,you can share it with fox. Someone who didn’t even understand what happened ” Sabrina tried to call his name but he ignored her “ Why? Why would you even involve some pet who didn’t even know what happened ? Were we just a tool for you guys to use huh? Maybe you guys never see us as a friend, but only a tool only to use and to dispose later “ Sabrina wanted to say something “ SO TELL ME WHAT ARE WE…. WHAT ARE WE TO YOU… ANSWER ME!!!!“ sabrina yelled “ PEANUT!!!!” suddenly the heavy air vanished. Only the sound of a heavy breathing that can be heard.
After a while, Sabrina asked him “ Peanut… are you okay now? “,
“I don’t know anymore” Peanut answered “ Yeah… yeah I’m okay. Sorry about that “ suddenly she realized something “ Peanut are you going to ask Tarot.. “ suddenly she was interrupted by someone “ Hey Peanut, sorry I’m late “ Tarot came from another room “ I foresee that you need me? “ Peanut stared at her “ Yeah I need to ask some questions, Sabrina, can Tarot and I have a private chat ?” with that, Sabrina left the room and hoped that everything was going to be fine.

yeahhh... that's all ehm... any more advice??


Fri Apr 27, 2018 11:12 am
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Post Re: is it too dark??
That's a major thing for Sabrina to just walk away from, especially when coming from Peanut. If I had to hazard a guess, Fenrir is taking over Peanut.

Regardless, there are still sentence structure issues, though markedly improved from previous entries, so good job on that. Have you been able to find a proofreader or editor yet?

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Fri May 04, 2018 11:17 pm
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Post Re: is it too dark??
uhm.... i'm sorry but what do you mean?? well, actually i use an apps called grammarly? i think that's what it called but i don't think it's a very good apps..
thank you i hope in the next update i can improvise more...


Sat May 05, 2018 10:34 am
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Post Re: is it too dark??
chapter 3
“ what do you want to ask hon ? “ as soon as Sabrina get out of the room tarot sit beside peanut and ask him, peanut face looked very paled after a chat with Sabrina, “ are you okay hon? what happened just now ? ” tarot asks worriedly. The thing is peanut wanted to ask about his dream, then what happened just now between him and Sabrina but now, it seems that those question is not very important for him right now, there’s one question that has been bugging him since the accident on the temple.
“ who am I to you ? “ that question shock tarot more than anything, “wha.. of course your my boyfriend what else peanut ? “ she looks straight into his eyes ‘ something is definitely wrong ‘, she really wanted to know what happened to him, before she can ask peanut interrupted “ tarot, could you be more honest with me ? “, now she looks very confused “ what are you talking about peanut? “, he only look at her, suddenly she relies on something. “ wait a sec.. are you still mad back at the.. “ peanut only replied is disturbed face. “ hon i already apologise why are you still angry with me ? “ peanut only glared at her.
“ tarot, yeah maybe i’m angry but what I feel now is disappointment..” tarot whine at that but peanut continued “ tarot why did you take fox with you? I mean why not king who has experience with this ? “ tarot begin to explained “ peanut did you forgot that you, king and fox went to heaven ?” peanut only shake his head. “ peanut, did you know rufus is dead?” peanut ears begin to drop “ yeah I know that tarot, the floating ring on his head kinda dead give away “ tarot begin to move slowly where peanut sit “ peanut, he’s your guardian angel for you and grape, he help you so that you survive inside the temple just like fox have two guardian angel, I know you didn’t like it when we bring fox and mungo but we didn’t have a choice, the time is very short for us to make decision”, suddenly peanut realize something “ tarot I know this next answer is unfair to you but please I beg you to answer this with the bottom of your heart “ tarot keep silent for a few second and noded “ tarot if you choose beetwen saving the world or me who will you choose? “. He’s right that question is unfair to tarot, she begins to think very deeply but there’s only one answer for that question “ I’m sorry peanut but I’m going to say saving the world “.
Peanut only look at her then he smiled with his goofy grin “ thank you tarot for your honest answer “ he began to stand and walk to the door, tarot stands up very quickly and grab his hand “ peanut, where are you going? I’m sorry that I choose that answer but you said that I need to answer with the bottom of my heart” peanut only smiled at her and pat her head and softly spoke “ it’s okay tarot but I think we need to take a break don’t you think? “ tarot look at him with wide eyes “ tarot, maybe it’s going to change with our relationship but you are still my friend and I know that it’s very selfish of me to always make you choose between me and your mission and I’m very sorry for that, so now you can focus on your mission, I’m very happy the time we spend together, don’t forget that and thank you for showing me every amazing place that you have taken me, so goodbye tarot and I hope you keep yourself safe “ with that peanut went outside and tarot only look at him with sad face.
On the way home peanut looked at the sky, he knew his heart is breaking again, this is his second time he feels like this but he knew that this is for the best, he began to think what happened when he got angry. He rarely feels that emotion, but this is most extreme emotion that he had, he remember that he got angry with grape when he plays pretends but it never took that far, when he started to deep thinking about it he didn’t realize that a van is trailing behind him, then someone get out of the van and took out a handkerchief and put it on peanut mouth to prevent him from screaming. Peanut tried to fight but got dizzy after taking a breath with the handkerchief on his muzzle, when his body started to limp the stranger dragged him to the van.
Heaven gate
‘Another job well done’ Cerberus came to the gate of heaven after she sent the lost kitten soul to another life, ‘ poor kit, i wonder what would happened if the van didn’t hit her ? ’. ceberus just got a task to bring a soul to another life from an accident, on a late night a kitten went on a hunt for a mice suddenly went she wanted to cross the road a white van came out of nowhere and ram the poor kitten, ‘ her owner cry every night after the accident, i hope they knew that her soul went to a better life’, when ceberus almost reach to open the gate something ram her from the back but she didn’t flinch. She looked behind her and saw kitsune sprawl on the ground.
“kitsune, why are you on a rush?” ceberus lend her hand to help kitsune up, after kitsune regain his balance he looked at her “ CEBY WHERE’S BAHAMUT I NEED TO TALK TO HIM!” ceberus suprised at his outburst “ calm down what happend “ kitsune began rambling “ just tell me where bahamut is, i need to tell him something, he’s coming please we need to..” ceberus became worried because she knew eventhough something is very important kitsune never act so serioius ‘what happend to him?’ ceberus look at him and place both hand on his shoulder “ kitsune please i don’t understand what your saying tell me what happend maybe i could help but please you need to take a breath!” with that kitsune took a deep breath and started to explained “ just now i met luna “ ceberus eyes became widden but kitsune continued “ she told me that he’s coming..” he started to shaken, ceberus looked at him with a scarred face the with a trembling voice she asked “ wh... who... who’s coming?’. Kitusne looked at her eyes and said a forbidden name “FENRIR”.
Back to the earth --
Peanut started to wake up, he slowly opened his eyes. After a few minute he regains consciousness he looked at his surrounding and he realised that he’s in a car, ’a van i think, but what happens?' he tried to move but he felt something restraining his body. He realised that a rope tied to his body, luckily his leg is free so he sat up, he realised that the van isn’t moving ‘ am i being kidnapped ? was it PETA again?’ he heard a sound, someone is talking, he looked at the driver seat and saw two people, a bald fat man and a thin man, peanut couldn;t see their face but he could hear what were they talking about. “tell me again why we kidnapped this dumb mutt?” the thin man asked “you stupid mold i told you we could trade this mutt with money, don't you see people in here love their pet almost like a family” the fat man talk almost like shout at the thin man “ well then why did you ran over the cat when you said that we can trade them with money?” the fat man replied “ HAH... that’s only for fun that’s her own fault she didn’t even see the van so BAM i hit her, what’s the matter you feeling sorry? they’re just animal a dumb one they meant nothing to me hahahahaha” the fat man and the thin man laughed at what they’ve done, peanut only looked at them with disbelief ‘how could they done such horrible thing And laugh at that? Unforgivable!’ peanut start to feel something like before, anger. ‘ human such a horrible creature is it not?’ peanut started to fist hist paw ’they are not to be trusted they only destroyed, every beautiful thing they step on it like a dirt’ the sound started to echoed in peanut head ‘ we do not need them they just waste of space’. Peanut begun to tramble from the anger his holding, his eyes started to change from a round to sharp feral eyes ‘we need to rid all of them’ peanut open him paws and retract his claws , ‘ yes we need to eliminate all of them’ peanut slowly got up and he started to growl “ yes human is a waste of space “ the two human startled and look behind them only to find peanut glaring at them ‘yes we need to do something’ “we must not trust them” ‘we need no human’ with the last sound before peanut lunged at them “we neED TO DEVOUR THEM” suddenly there’s a voice outside the van “THIS IS THE POLICE PUT YOUR HAND UP WHERE WE CAN SEE YOU” peanut stop his movement and suddenly the driver door is forced opened, the door suddenly broke only to find a black great dane? Lift the door “oh no i’m sorry i didn’t know the door is very fragile” someone shouted beside him “ officer’s keep your apologies for later we need to lock this I love you now!” officer bill came and forced them out and put them on the ground. Then the back door of the van is opened by someone a husky came and shouted “is someone injured?” peanut only look at him “peanut is that you? Are you okay?“ ‘don’t trust them’ peanut growled at him, “peanut it’s me, fox” suddenly someone came beside him “fox, what happened” fido suddenly came beside him “ fido, it’s peanut, something wrong with him” fido looked at peanut only to find peanut growling at both of them “peanut, it’s me fido are you okay? please calm down everything is fine” fido slowly aproach him and when his paw wanted to touch him peanut bite him, with a loud sound of snap fido almost didn;t dodge the bite “GAH... peanut why do you do that?” fido take good looked at him, what he saw almost scared him his eyes is split like a feral, his claws looked almost like a very sharp knife, his teeth bared like an animal tried to tear out his enemy, then someone came along “officers what take you so long?” officer ralph started to walk to both at them, “sir is one of our friend he started growling and almost bite officer fido paw” ralph look at peanut, when he saw him he didn’t see a beast but an animal terrified of his sarrounding, with a calm look he get inside the van “sir be carefull he’s not..” ralph silenced them and walk through when he neared peanut he opened his arm, before peanut lunged at him ralph hugged him, peanut tried to escaped, he strugle to be free, ralph whispered at him “it’s okay verything is fine” ‘don’t let him touch you’ peanut continued to struggle “ it’s okay nobody is hurting you” 'DON’T TRUST HIM’ “it’s okay to be scared but please trust me your safe, i promise you nobody will harm you, i’ll keep you safe, please, trust me” after a few minutes become rigid ‘please be carefull pup...’ the sound started to fade away, peanut body started to relaxed, ralph started to untied him and the soothed him, peanut started to smelled him ‘ he smells like a grass and dirt but it feels nice, he feels nice’ peanut started to growl but not in anger but pleasure ‘he’s warm he’s very kind’ peanut started to rub his muzzle around ralph neck 'i don’t know him but why did he make me fells so...... safe’ with that ralph started to lift him bridal style and get out of the van.
Sandwich’s house –
“soooo….. borrrrreeeeedddd” after peanut left grape still sleep on the sofa after a while she got bored, she tried playing games but it’s not fun when peanut is not around, she tried to called max but he’s busy. ‘please make it interesting today’, “grape? I thought you were going out with peanut “ jill sandwich came from the laundry room, “no mom, he said that he’s going to ask tarot for another date that’s why I don’t want to disturb them” jill came sit next to grape and started to pet her “ well why don’t you go play outside ? “ grape started to purr but with lazy sound she said “ it’s too hoooot today….” Suddenly the phone rang, jill got up and started to walk to the phone “ hello? “, grape tried to listen, “ what?!.. When?!.. How?!... Is he okay?!... I’ll be there in a sec!!” grape look at her mom and what she saw is the woman face started to pale and her eyes glimmering holding back her tears “ EARL WE NEED TO GO !” grape become scared “ mom what happened? ” earl ran from lawn “ what happened honey? “ jill take the car key and yelled “ IT’S PEANUT WE NEED TO GO NOW!! ”, grape face started to pale, she wished for an interesting day but this is beyond the measure, she didn’t want anything happened to peanut “ please God I beg you let him be okay “ with that the sandwich went to the car and drive to where peanut have been kidnapped.
THE HEAVEN COURTROOM –
“ does anyone disagree using this new section of the rule that says ‘ anyone who used the mortal being without their consent will be strip from immortal being to be reincarnated as mortal being‘? “, bahamut looked around the courtroom as other celestial being shakes their head as they agree to this new section of the rule. This rule has been made after pete and dragon lost the board game, they knew if this continued the peace on the heaven will be ruined that’s why the ‘guardian angel’ has been sent to help the mortal if something went wrong in their world. “if anyone didn’t have any argument then this section shall be.. “ suddenly the door had been open with such full force ” BAHAMUT! ” bahamut look at the one who opened the door “ KITSUNE YOU BETTER HAVE A GOOD REASON FOR INTERUPTED THIS TRIAL OR GOD HELP ME I WILL... “ kitsune interupted “ HE”S COMING “ bahamut looked worried, kitsune never bother to interupted any trial “ who’s coming?” kitusne looked around the court “ THE GOD OF DESTRUCTION ‘FENRIR’ “ everybody looked shocked suddenly one of the celestial stand up “ THIS IS OUTRAGES THERE’S NO WAY THAT CREATURE CAME BACK FROM THE ‘DEEPEST OF THE ABYSS” WE TRAPPED HIM THERE, WHERE DO YOU EVEN HEARD THIS INFORMATION KITSUNE?” the one who shouted is an anubis the one who brings the lost soul to be judge, kitsune looked at him “ if you want more information his ex-mate will gladly answer your call” anubis looked shaken “th.. the... the luna? How? Why now?” all of the celestial begun to argue one another after hearing this information suddenly bahamut shouted “ENOUGH!!” the room went silent “ why are you scared of this creature ? we already defeated him once then we can defeated him again this creature is not unbeatable “ everybody became relief after he said that “kitsune after this i need you to gather all the celestial being spread them we need more information regarding this situation “ kitsuine only looked at him “ what are you planning bahamut?” bahamut only replied “easy, we sealed him once, we sealed him again”. Kitsune only nodded his head then he flew away to gather the other celestial being

dear lord, i didn't know that making a story will be this hard URRRHGGGHHHHH..... well i at least i hope you guys enjot that...
ps.. i know some of the grammar is still missplaced and the structure is a mess... i'm still trying to learn how to make good writer so at least you guys could enjoy that T_T.... UGGGHHHH.... now to the EXAM WE GOOOOO..


Fri May 11, 2018 9:52 pm
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Joined: Tue Mar 13, 2018 7:24 am
Posts: 23
Post Re: is it too dark??
hmm.... after the end of the final arc temple crashers i'm really confused on how should i do next.. should i use my present plot or making another plot.. welp... at least i tried...

Chapter 4
“ WHOA...down boy “ one of the paramedics almost got bitten by peanut, the paramedic tried to give a tranquillizer shot after they saw what happened to him, before peanut can bite the one who gives the shot ralph hold him and put him on his lap trying to calm him down, “ peanut, is fine they only want to give you some medicine is okay nobody going to hurt you “, peanut only growl at them. Most of the k9 force look at them with disbelieve look, not because what happened to peanut but the way their leader tried to calm him down, fido tried to start the conversation “ i can’t believe what i’m seeing here “, mungo looked at the pair “ poor guy.. I hope he’s going to be fine “, fox looked at mungo “he’s not talking about what happened to peanut”. Mungo looked at fox with questioning look, everyone only thinking one thing ‘you’re too innocent mungo’. “GRRRRR…..” everybody began to looked at peanut again, nobody has ever seen some pet like this because most of the kidnapped one always have a trauma or an anger management issue but this is very new for them. They looked at peanut the way he act, almost like feral he didn’t knew his surrounding, he didn’t knew his friends, and most of the time he’s only growled, ralph looked at the other k9 “has anyone contact his family?” terrance answered “yes sir his family is on the way here”, ralph only nodded his head, he begun to stroke peanut head and his answer was peanut tail begun wagging and tried to snuggle closer but his eyes still aware of the surrounding, “aww… they’re so cute” officer bill looked at them, fido and fox only looked at them with mouth agape “officer fido, officer fox you said that this is your friend, so why he didn’t recognize you two?” ralph question the two of them, “we didn’t know sir, peanut is the nicest dog in the neighborhood he never bite anyone, heck I never saw him angry at someone too” fido answered “peanut never get angry sir, there’s one time he draw a picture of a dog with cat tail and show it to me and bino..” ralph interrupted “ who’s bino?” fido answered “he’s my brother sir” fox continued “we bully him and kick him out of the GODC but I never saw any anger in his eyes only later when fido invited him again at the club he even gives bino a present” ralph looked scowling at him “you bullied him?” fox face became shamefull his tail beetwen his leg “yes sir but not psychically” ralph looked at him in the eyes “have you said sorry to this pup?” fox looked at him with wide eyes “of course sir peanut is too ignorance and innocent, he even never bite a mailman” ralph only answered “good” he begun stroking peanut head again.
Suddenly there’s a roar sound of an engine everyone looked at the source, the sandwich’s just came to the crime scene once the car stopped they got out and ran to peanut, “MY BOY WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM?” jill tried to run through the crime scene only to be blocked by bill, “jill, calm down everything is fine your boy is safe” jill begun to calmed down “please, tell me what happened?” while bill tried to explained what happened, grape walked pass by and search for peanut “GRAPE WAIT DON”T GO NEAR THE CRIME SCENE” fox tried to reached her “ARE YOU KIDDING ME, ARE YOU SERIOUSLY TRIED TO PREVENT ME SEEING MY BEST FRIEND WHO MAYBE GOT A TRAUMA ?” fox tried to explained “grape, I know you want to see him but please wait a moment he’s..” grape interrupted “but what fox?”. “GRRR….. BARK,BARK” the sound of peanut barking caught by grape and his parents, “PEANUT?!” grape run to him and her parents follow him, what they saw terrified them, peanut growled at like a savage animal biting everyone if they at his ranged, what keeping him is the leader of k9 officers. “peanut…” grape make a small sound almost like wailing, then with a shock looked peanut looked at the source sound, when she saw each other she looked shocked because his eyes are now sharp shape. Earl came to him “hey buddy it’s me you know me it’s your old man..” peanut looked at him, his face intrigued him, earl continued “it’s okay I won’t let anyone hurt you” earl reached him gently when peanut tried to sniff his hand he stopped and let him smelled ‘this man smells like a coffe, should I know who’s this man is?’ then jill came beside earl “hey dear it’s okay momy here it’s safe now” now peanut curiosity it’s at peek like he wants to know who these human are, why they so gentle, why they so nice, why they make him trust them so fast so he slowly get out of ralph lap and walk on four slowly to them, then grape came she gently stroke his head “hey dumb dumb it’s me grape your best friend you know me right?” suddenly something trigger his memory, the sound of her yelling at him ‘PEANUT, we are not ‘just friend” we were never ‘just friend’ you are my BEST FRIEND in the whole wide world..’ then he gently grab her hand and put it on his cheek, he tried to smelled her ‘I know this smell, I know this softly lavender smell, I know her it’s her’ then he only said one word “mine” everybody looked at him with shocking face, grape face become crimson red after he said that word, grape tried to speak “p..pea..peanut what are you…” but peanut interrupted again “this belongs to me, all of it” everybody went silent “this is mine to protect,mine to love..” grape body begun to tremble “mine to cherish.. my home, my safe… my family” he took his time to feel her warm hand, it feels so nice for him, grape looked at him with the happiest face it clears that he still remembered her and that’s makes her smiled at him ‘silly dog’, his eyes slowly closed but one of the paramedic awaken from his shocked state and told them “he need to take this shot so that he won’t harm his own body” jill came to the paramedic and take the shot “I will give it to him” jill walk behind peanut “dear, I will give you something it’s okay it will only make you sleepy but everyone will stay by your side” peanut looked at her then he continued to feel grape paws on his cheek, it almost like he given her permission so jill put the shot on his arm, his body started to feel limp before he could fall ralph rush to him and catch him, grape looked questioned at him, ralph only answered “I’ll explained later” that’s only make her confused. Ralph picked peanut bridal style again and put him on ambulance. One of the paramedic question the sandwich “which one of you will accompany him?” grape started to asked “mom,dad can I accompany peanut?” jill only stroke her head “go ahead dear we will follow you guys with the car” grape get in and sit beside the bed that peanut take, with the sound of ambulance called they drive to the nearest hospital.

Selûne ---

This is a place where the almost forgotten god or goddess is resting, a realm where once the subject or their children once forgotten their god or goddess, once if this god or goddess completely forgotten their existence will be deceased. not many god or goddess stay in this place because many have already gone, only some of them still remains in this place, this place is almost like a fallen kingdom. A portal have been open in this realm, a white wolf came from the portal, “recipiet Luna, quae tibi data est novi? (welcome back luna, have you given the news?)” from behind the fallen pillar a tentacle move slowly from the shadow showing the creature who welcome the wolf, a kraken “Gratias tibi ago, domine maris, i, quod iam mittit verba,(thank you, lord of the sea, why yes i already sent the news)” the white wolf smiled at the kraken, “quid est quod vulpes bene esse? (how is that fox well being?)”, another shadow came from the shadow, a monkey “Si amicum tuum quare non visere cura teipsum hanuman? (if you care for your old friend why don't go and see for yourself, hanuman?)“ the wolf answered sharply, the monkey only laughed “hahahahaha.... vulpes, et futura tempora oblivione sit senex est (hahahaha...that fox may already forgotten this old man)” the wolf make a pout face at that “Non enim tua natus hanuman (your not that old hanuman)”. The monkey only laughed harder, the kraken tired to calm them down “satis hanuman, luna modo venerunt ad reliquam partem non dimiserunt eam vobis? (enough hanuman, luna just came back let her rest for a bit won't you?)”. the wolf stomp her feet and grumble, the she enetered the ruins followed by the two gods. Inside the ruin there are another four gods awaited them… white tiger, blue dragon, green turtle, and the last phoenix.. once the rest of the gods taken a sit the white tiger asked something “Itaque Luna unde venis?(so,where have you been Luna?)”, the white wolf answered “sed amici illati byakko(only meeting with an old friend baykko)” the green turtle interrupted “nunc ergo ut negotio fratrem nostrum, non quaesivit quia quod est lunae sicut scitis (now,now brother is not our business to asked something like that to luna you know) “ the white tiger looked at the white wolf “i paenitet luna necesse est interrogare (I’m sorry luna for unnecessary question)” the white wolf only giggled “denique quod suus 'a magnus paciscor suus' non byakko (it’s fine byakko it’s not a big deal for me)” the blue dragon asked out of curiosity “ita ut non sit senex hanuman venistis amici? (so does that mean you visited hanuman old friend?)” the monkey only snickered “hehehehe…. Sic fecit (hehehe… yes she did)” the phoenix laughed “hahahahah…. Scio quia petistis vobis parvulo vellet facere (hahahaha… you only asked that because you wanted to know your little one is doing)” the blue dragon become annoyed “ohe! ego semper rogavit primus, qui propter hoc facite quotienscumque non probaverunt (hey! I asked that because that brat always do whenever she liked)” the phoenix begun teasing “ yeah… non desunt vestrae erunt d.d (deedee) (yeah… your little d.d (deedee) must bee missing you )” everyone laughed at that. Suddenly a sound can be heard “ you guys knew many language yet you guys still use that old language” a figured came from the entrance of the ruin, all the gods looked at the figured, the phoenix only answered with a bored face “oh… it’s you”

Babylon Hospital ---

At one of the room lay a dog unconscious, after the ambulance arrived at the hospital they rushed him inside the lab to check what exactly happened to him, now it’s waiting game until he regains conscious. Peanut started to have a similar nightmare, but this time he walked past his fallen friend until he met a familiar purple cat. ‘this dream again’ his body trembled as he kneeled in front of the cat and started to cried ‘I don’t want to see this again’ he sobbed as he pleaded ‘please I beg you…. Stop this…’ suddenly a footstep can be heard ”really? Are you going to cry over this nightmare?” the sound of footstep become closer and closer until a canine shadowy figure standing in front of peanut. Peanut heard the sound but he didn’t pay any attention his only mind is in front of his eyes the purple cat. “hmm…. She really is important to you”, peanut still didn’t pay any attention “brat… look at me” peanut looked at the figured “pathetic.. look at you crying over something that isn’t there” the figured saw his face, the tears that stream on his face, the ears that fell on top of his head, the eyes that only seen as a sorrowful. “who are you?” peanut asked, the figure didn’t answered him, the figure walked in front of the fallen cat. Suddenly it raised his foot and step at the cat until it blew and smoke cover peanut and the figure, peanut eyes become wide as he screamed in terror “ WHAT HAVE YOU DONE??!! “ the figure only looked at him , peanut tried to stand now his body tremble with anger “Y..Yo...YOU MONSTER!!!!”, peanut tried to lunge at the figure but it snap it’s fingered and all around them fanished leaving the two of them and the darkness. “brat.... don’t test my patience”, peanut looked shocked at what happened until he heard a cracking noise, the figure is reashaping, the figured now crouched down on four it’s legs had a claws sharper than a knife, it’s fur is jet black, his long muzzle showed it teeth that could tear someone neck, it’s eyes shown the colour of a crimson blood. Now the figures looked like a wolf but bigger with it’s lean body it moves toward where peanut stand, peanut body stood like a stone because how shock he is, “now brat.... you're looking at something that can end your world”.

D’Angelo house ---

“tarot... have you eaten something?” after peanut left the house tarot is skulking inside her room, sabrina tried to enter her room to comfort her but the door won’t budge, she tried asking, she tried making a distraction but none of it make tarot feels good, ‘dear lord please let this work’ so now sabrina bring a bowl of kibbles to ease tarot heart “tarot.. i know your hungry please come out for a sec.. i have kibbles!!” she waited for e few minutes but the answered she got is silenced.’muffins and cookies it... now what do i do?’ suddenly she heard a click sound, the door now is opened revealing a sad face of pomeranian dog. “thank you sabrina, i am a little hungry” tarot tried to take the bowl but sabrina lift her hand, “tarot, would you mind i come into your room?”, tarot begun to sighed then she move to the side and open the door more wider, “come in sabrina” sabrina enter tarot room, inside the room it’s almost like a library the shelves contains many books that put on order from down to up, in the middle of the room there’s a star insignia, a mirror is hanging in front of the insignia while her bed is on the corner of the room. Sabrina and tarot move to the bed, after sitting down tarot begun to eat the kibbles while sabrina only looked at her, the room filled with the sound of tarot eating, after a while she put the bowl down and turn to sabrina. “well... are you going to ask something?” tarot asked her teh only answered she got “do i?” tarot looked questioning at her “don’t you wish to know what happend?” sabrina only shake her head “do you want to talk about it?” tarot became silenced “tarot, i don't want to push you if you don’t want to talk about it what i only want is to comfort you now” sabrina give her a sad smile, tarot begin to smile too “thank you sabrina i’m really happy to have met you” sabrina begun to tease her “what?! You only happy after you met me?” she’s grinning while showing her full teeth, tarot looked annoyed “OH!? You know what i mean” she looked at the other side and make a huff sound, a few minutes silenced the both of the girl begun to giggle and then they laughed with a happy face. After a while tarot stop laughing “sabrina i will said it again, thank you and i’ really happy to have met you” sabrina only smiled at that “your welcome tarot” suddenly they heard a crash sound, they looked at the source and found th mirror now is in pieces. Sabrina looked confused when she looked at tarot she became shocked, tarot face became paled “tarot, what happened?” tarot looked at her “i don't know, but i think someone is in trouble” sabrina ask her again “who?” tarot “peanut...”.

now this is the power of google translate..... i don't know many language... :lol: :lol: :lol:


Wed Jun 06, 2018 8:09 am
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Joined: Tue Mar 13, 2018 7:24 am
Posts: 23
Post Re: is it too dark??
Chapter 5
THE HEAVEN COURTROOM –
“ so.. let me get this straight....” in the middle of the room stood one of the god trusted angels, Michael, surrounded by many demi god, because many of the demi god form are a beast, Michael turn his form into a canine form, golden retriever, with his golden fur and his pure white wings he stood straight in the middle of the courtroom “ you guys summon me to wish that, father, can grand you a blessing to imprison one.... let me say that again ONE demi god, that were have been prison many centuries ago, now tell me why should i do that? “ one of the demi god yelled “ PLEASE I BEG OF YOU SONS OF THE GOD YOU NOW HOW TERRIBLE HIS POWER ARE... WE NEED HIS BLESSING SO WE COULD AT LEAST IMPRISON HIM AGAIN “ Michael looked around the court room then with a sigh “ all of you said that he already escaped, but when is that? “ all of them became silent then paled looked from all of their face confirm that they did not know when. “ from the look at all your face, you guys didn;t know at all, then let this question process your mind, when he already escaped why didn’t he let just say destroy or maybe attack all of you? “ with that Bahamut stood and questioned the angel “ what are you implying sons of God? “ Michael looked around him “ the day Fenrir got imprison is the day my brother cast away from heaven “ all of the demi gods inside the court looked shocked at hearing that statement, Bahamut stutter “w...wha...what are you... “ before he could finish Michael interrupted him “ don’t judge him... that’s what i can tell you, he has a reason for rampaging, let your mind process why did he rampaging, what could he get from destroying the place and for who? that’s all i could say “ with that he turns around and starts walking out, before he could exit the place kitsune yelled “ WAIT... WHAT DO YOU MEAN FOR WHO? “ Michael glanced behind him “ let just say he has a reason.. that reason only father and his other sons know it if you want to know more asks father “ with that he flew out the room leaving a confused state of many demi god.
Babylon Hospital ---
“ so can you explain to me why my best friend seems so attached to you? “ grape asked ralph, after they arrived the paramedics put peanut on a bed and pushed it into the lab room, while grape wanted to follow him the paramedics told her to stay in the waiting room. She wanted to protest but a paw went to her shoulder she looked behind her and saw ralph shake his head, he told her that it will be best if they stay out of the way and let the paramedics treat peanut, she silently grumble and stomp her way to the waiting room, their parent talked to one of the doctors and the doctor reassured them that peanut will be alright so with that they follow grape to the waiting room after that ralph join in. Grape thought it was a good time to ask what happened back there. “ aren’t you going to ask what happened to your brother first? “ ralph looked away in hope she changed the topic, but grape have none of that “ i’m going to ask that after you tell me why you that rarely see peanut or at least talk to him could make him so attached to you? “, for a few second ralph didn’t make a move then jill begin to talk “ officer... i know that it’s making you uncomfortable but we need to know what really happend please “ ralph finally looked at sandwich’s family, still doubting then earl speak up “ look i know it’s weird when a male suddenly attach to you and .... “ ralph interupted “ wait wait wait.. sir it’s not like that “ grape then join in “ i know it’s not very comfortable but.. “ ralph suddenly yelled “ PLEASE IT’S NOT LIKE THAT! “ then a nurse came in and begin scolded the familly and the officer “ please remain to be quiet... this is hospital not a mall “ jill begun apologizing “ i’m verry sorry we’ll be quiet “ then the nurse walk out leaving all of them in akward situation, then earl speak up again “ then what is it? “ ralph sigh and begin to talk well tried to “ my instinct is overprotective of him “ grape didn’t hear that “ wait could you repeat that “ ralph mumble again then grape become annoyed “ dear lord just speak already “ ralph then talk a little louder “ My Instict Is OverProtective of him “ suddenly one of the nurse shush them leaving grape jaw slacked open jill and earl eyes become wide. After for a few second earl cough and jill regain her composure but grape still shocked hearing ralph statement, jill decided to break the tension “ ehm.. could you explain that ? “ ralph face become reddened “ it’s not like that... when i see him my first thought is not an uncontrollable dog but a scared pup fighting for its life my only first instinct is to calm him and protect him... just cradle him until regain his sense “ grape regain her mind and shocked her head “ uhm... so... did it bother you when he become attached to you like nuzzling you or.. “ Ralph quickly interject “ no...no no no actually it’s kinda comforting “ they almost missed what he was saying and they become shocked again leaving the german shepard flustered, grape face become red and without proper explanation she thought something different from what ralph is saying. Then they heard someone running towards them and the nurse yelled “ DON’T RUN “ a pomeranian dog and a black cat, grape looked towards them “ tarot ? sabrina ? what are you doing here ? “ tarot and sabrina catch a breath, after they could breath normal “ i... i.. ‘huff... huff’ ... is peanut alright? “ grape looked shocked and the she realised “ oh yeah your psychic.. yeah he’s okay for now.. but.. “ tarot looked alarmed “ but what ?!” grape tried to explained “ well i don’t know the full story but when i got there he’s not himself.. “ tarot looked confused “ what do you mean? “ grape looked uncomfortable “ he growled at everyone he just bark he didn’t yelled it almost like he went.. “ sabrina interupted “ like he’s a feral.. “ grape and tarot looked at sabrina at the same time “ yeah, but how did you know.. “ sabrina interupted again “ tell me grape does he eyes turn sharp? ” grape eyes become wide “ yes..how did you know? “ sabrina hand rubs her other arm she looked disturbed “ well, peanut came to our house looking for tarot but she had to do something, i tried casually talk to him but it led him answering something he didn’t want to shared, he become furious it makes me tremble for thinking about that “ after hearing that statement they become silent, tarot then break the silenced “ how long did the doctor put him there ? can we see him ? can we.... ‘sniff..sniff’ “ tarot smelled something familiar it came from ralph “ grape.. why officer ralph stay here? “ grape the noticed “ oh yeah... he’s the one that help peanut stay safe “ tarot glared at ralph “ so could you explain why peanut scent is all over your body? “ ralph take a sharp breath, sabrina gasp at tarot accusation, then sabrina tried to calm tarot “ wait! tarot maybe your nose smell something different “ tarot become angry “ NO! I know this scent.. i always knew this cinnamon smell, it belongs to peanut “ there was silent for a minute then ralph take a large breath then “ who are you to him? “ tarot become shocked “ i....i..i’m.. “ ralph interupted “ don’t accused someone like they did something bad... if you really wanted to know why i have that scent it’s because when peanut on feral mode he didn’t trust anyone.. he would attack anyone that approach him... i’m the only one that he trust... for the scent he hide and nuzzled me for comfort.. for everyone he looked like a beast that wanted to rip off their limb.... for me.... it looks like a pup that scared at everything... in my eyes he eyes full of fears and hatred... he just got himself kidnapped, the kidnappers maybe have done something to him. “ after tarot heared ralph expalination she whimpered “ miss... i don,t know what you relationship with him but just so you know my instict is on everprotective mode... believe me i just wanted to bite the face of his kidnappers just to satisfied my instict... but i don’t want to leave him... i just wanted to see him if he is fine then i will be on my way “ with that ralph walk out from the waiting room, before he exit the room something grab his hand “ officer i’m sorry.... for my beahaviour it just that he is important to me but now... “ grape got curious “ tarot.. what happend when peanut went to your house? “ tarot face become sad “ he... “ before she could finish they heard anguish scream, the scream is making their face paled as white as sheet,ralph suddenly run at the source sound until the other realised the scream belongs to one dog “PEANUT!!!”.
Selûne ---
“ so what are you doing here oh so called “ God Of Destruction “ “ inside the ruin stood 7 forgotten god, phoenix born from the ashes of sun, byakko the powefull white tiger, genbu an armor living turtle, seiryu the dragon king of east sea, Hanuman a mischief white monkey, kraken the king of high sea, luna the mother of all wolves, and then before them stood a black wolf, bigger than the powerful white tiger, his blue eyes intimidated all the god inside the ruin, his strong body that can tear anyone apart, none other than the creature that befits the title of the god of destruction 'Fenrir'. “ oh come on~ can an old friend visit all of you ? “ phoenix annoyed at that, Luna huff at that statement “ ‘old friend’ ? i didn’t know that when i live with you for centuries ago we only see as friend “ fenrir just grin “ oh~~ come on.. you know what i mean “ genbu begun to speak “ hmm.... this bring back old memories... before you go rampaging all the heaven realm “ fenrir smiled at that “ welp that’s what happened if you messed with my life “ luna then question the black wolf “ so have you found your mate my ‘ex-mate’ ? ” then fenrir went silent “ luna...” luna interrupted “ fenrir don’t pity me.. i'm the one who wanted the rejection so please i’m not jealous it’s just a joke... i really like your new mate so that’s why i asked if you already found him ? “ fenrir giver her a sad smile “ i know... i’m sorry luna but to answer your question no i haven’t “ seiryu then asked him “ so... do you want to asked for helping you search your mate? “ fenrir shake his head “ no... actually i need a favour “ hanuman then join the conversation “ oh~~ the mighty pup asking a favour hehehehe “ fenrir glared at him “ shut up old man “ the monkey only laughed, seiryu interupted “ so.. what favour? “ fenrir face now looked serious “ i need you guys to find my ‘sister’ “ all of the forgotten god face looked shocked, before anyone can raise their voice fenrir making a stop sign “ all of you guys even the god and his sons now what really happened those centuries ago “ of course they know, the one that the demi god judge to imprison is the false one and the one that needed to imprison is still out there. Fenrir then continued “ i need to find her before the other demi god found me “ the other went silent until the luna face came to realization “ fenrir maybe i know where she is “ fenrir looked at her “ where ? “ luna answered “ this is just a speculation but i need to investigate first “ kraken then interrupted “ i’m going with you luna you need another being that have experienced fighting with another god, not that i have against you going alone but we need to be careful around her “ fenrir then nod his head “ thank you both of you then until then i will keep going to search my mate “ with that fenrir make a dimension hole and leap into it, byakko then raised his voice “ luna, kraken, you are going to find someone that can even manipulate him, you guys are going to search someone that even stronger than the god of destruction itself “ luna and kraken nod their head and start walking out of the ruin.


Mon Jul 02, 2018 7:40 am
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