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Four Hearts 
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Post Four Hearts
Well, anyone who was watching earlier might I noticed I said I was going to start one of these... well, here it is. (Ps. I'm using Neko's rubric for italics and such for two reasons... 1) It works 2) I'm too lazy to make a different one)
Neko wrote:
Rubric:
Italicized words are a characters thoughts
Bold Words Are used when a character is yelling or a loud sound is heard.
***** a Line of stars will indicate a change in the story, be it a different scene or character
(A/N -text here-) This is an Author's Note, used to explain something to the reader.


I also use italics in quotes for both emphasis (just one word) and flashback narration (entire sentences in quotes)

Chapter 1, Part 1: The Doctor
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"He-Hello?" Lyd called out into the dark room. Silence. Lyd walked into the room in search of the lightswitch. Of course, he thought to himself. I get here on time and he can't even bother to show up.

"Hello, Lyd," said a voice from behind him. Startled by the voice and sudden appearance of light, he turned and fell to the floor. "Heh, be careful now," warned the voice, which belonged to man wearing an odd, entirely brown outfit; brown shoes, brown slacks, brown jacket, brown hat, and even a brown moustache.

"A-Are you Dr. Tuldar?" Lyd asked while climbing climbing back up to his feet.

"No, no, Lyd. I'm Dr. Pete. Dr. Tuldar was out today, so I'll be taking your case." He paused. "Hmm, you look awfully familiar."

"I can't imagine how." Lyd rolled his eyes.

"I know," Dr. Pete said snapped his fingers. He took a picture out of his wallet and handed it to Lyd. "You look alot like my dog, King."

Lyd stared at the picture. Another corgi? he asked himself. Although Lyd didn't know what breed of dog he was, many people considered him to be a corgi, except for one major difference; thier size. Lyd was much to big to be a corgi. Besides, he continued, the only resemblence I can see is our fur.
Lyd handed the photo back to the doctor. "You put your dog in a suit and top hat?"

"Hey, this is your therapy session, not mine."

Don't remind me.

"Why don't you go lay down over there so we can get started." Dr. Pete motioned towards a couch on the other side of the room. While Lyd climbed onto the couch, Dr. Pete sat in a chair opposite him. "So, where should we start?"

Lyd thought for a second. "I don't know, you're the therapist," he replied with just a little too much attitude.

"Ok then," Dr. Pete started. "We'll start at the beginning. As far back as you can remember."

"Well..."

**************************

"... the first thing I remember is rain in a dark allyway."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
End of Chapter 1, Part 1


Well, I know it's short, but I wanted to get something up today and this was all I could think of in 80 minutes. After I get out of school they'll get longer.

Edit: upon seeing the length after posting, I realize that most will be about this length, but I'll try to make them longer each time (writing isn't my strongest talent)

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Last edited by DarkHeartsAndSuch on Thu May 27, 2010 9:03 pm, edited 2 times in total.



Thu May 27, 2010 3:32 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
Not a bad start (Love how he ends up seeing Dr. Pete). Looking forward to seeing more.

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Thu May 27, 2010 6:53 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
Thank you. So far I have like, 7 chapters outlined, each split into 2-3 parts (this first one will probly be 3 parted)

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Thu May 27, 2010 7:03 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
I like it so far, seems interesting. Also, I'm glad my rubric was useful for you. :)

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Thu May 27, 2010 9:00 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
Thanks, and that reminds me, I have a question for you.

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Thu May 27, 2010 9:16 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
DarkHeartsAndSuch wrote:
Thanks, and that reminds me, I have a question for you.


For me?

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Thu May 27, 2010 9:21 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
Yeah, though I don't think here in the open would be the best place...

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Thu May 27, 2010 9:25 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
DarkHeartsAndSuch wrote:
Yeah, though I don't think here in the open would be the best place...


Just send me a Pm :)

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Thu May 27, 2010 9:27 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
Chapter 1, Part 2: Dr. Interuptions and Dra Maytan
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"... the first thing I remember is rain in a dark allyway."

"Wait..."


***************

"... this sounds familiar," Dr. Pete interupted. "This sound like every sap story ever told. So let me guess, you're walking down this dark and rainy allyway, right?"

Lyd looked a Dr. Pete with a "Are you kidding me?" kind of look on his face. "No," he finally answered. "This is my birthday, as in the anniversary of the day of my birth, so can I get back to it please?"

Dr. Pete looked shocked that he was wrong. "Oh, why yes, of course. Please continue."

Lyd rolled his eyes at the doctor. "Anyway..."

*****************************************************

"... in this dark and rainy sideroad, I was walkin-"

"I thought you sai-"

"Just go with it. I walked down the ally, looking for food. That's when they found me. They seemed to instantly appear all around me. They were all different; some tall, some short. Some were dogs while others were cats, but they all shared one thing, three orange dots painted on their backs. They were 'Dra Kyhk,' The Gang."

"I would've run if I wasn't amazed by the size of the group. Then
she walked out of the group, right up to me. She was barely taller than me, and as I found out later, just a little older too. She handed me something she had one of the others bring up to us. It looked like food, and it smelled like food, so I ate it. She smilied. Her smile then was one of the most beautiful things I've seen before or since. She had introduced herself as 'Dra Maytan,' which I later translated into 'The Leader.' she put her arm over my shoulder and led me into the group."

"I remembered her saying as she led me in, 'You are now welcomed into our group. Consider us your new family, your new home.' There was no way I could possibly refuse their offer. Her offer. I always thought they were just helping a poor and helpless pup left out on the street. I don't think I could have possibly been more wrong."

"Though I don't think I fully understood the gravity behind what she had offered me, nor did I care. If I had died the next day, I wouldn't regret my decision. I was just glad to finally have a place to call home, and a family all my own..."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
End of Chapter 1


Well, what do you all think?

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Fri May 28, 2010 10:30 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
Looking good, though the shortness of it kind of brings me down.

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Fri May 28, 2010 11:17 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
Here is Chapter 2 (not broken up!)


Chapter 2: Dra Kyhk
~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"So," Dr. Pete started, "I'm guessing that the spots on your back are from them."

"Yeah," replied Lyd with the tiniest hint of sadness in his voice. "I was 'spotted' later that night."

Dr. Pete thought for a second. "So, what exactly did this 'gang' do?"

"Dra Kyhk was essentially a mobile pound run by animals, and each animal found was often instantly given a home. Even though I had just joined, I was given one of the highest ranks; Lyd Rayt Maytan. (A/N: Many animals in the gang were called by their rank, and Lyd never changed his) I was in charge of the group finding cats. For the first few days, I noticed Dra Maytan working with us in the cat branch. At first I thought it was because she was a cat and all, but then I realized that it was because she was watching me."

"Did you ever find out why?"

"Pretend for a second that you're a CEO of some stupid company. If you hired some random guy off the street and put him in a high ranking position, you'd want to keep an eye on him, right?"

"Well, yeah, I guess. But why would I hire some hippie off the street?"

Lyd ignored the question. "Anyway, I was often the one to talk to the cats before we put them in their new homes. I recall one cat in particular that was quite difficult to track down. He had this skateboard-like thing he rode around the city. Normally we would find someone and then find a home for them, but this cat was too fast for us. The Locators had already found him a home before we could get him, a Spanish teacher who just finished college, Miss Tree."

"Did you ever catch him?" asked Dr. Pete, even though he already knew the answer.

"Yeah, but just barely. He ended up breaking the board at the end, he hit a pole."

"Okay, you've told me all about your branch of this gang, what were the others?"

"Huh?"

"Well," explained Dr. Pete, "you mentioned these 'Locators' earlier. And they found you, so obviously it wasn't just a cat based operation. What other parts were in this group?"

"Oh, well there was the Locators as you said. They were the ones who found the homes for each rescuee. They normally hung out around the vet's. Apparently they found a lot of adoptioneers there. There was the dog branch too, who located and caught dogs in need. They were the ones tracking me until Ro- I mean Dra Maytan stepped in. And then there was the Central Core, the overmind of the entire operation. Everything that happened didn't happen without their say-so."

"I'm guessing this is where Dra Maytan fits in."

"Well, you're really on your game today, aren't you?" Lyd asked rhetorically. "Yes, yes it is. She always had her eye on everything. If she thought an animal either the dog branch or us had found would be an effective member of the group, she'd take over tracking, like she did for me. She was an expert at it too. Where it would take one of us two to three days, it would take her one."

"Wait, there was this giant organization here and no one knew about it?

"Oh, no, the humans knew about us. How else would I have gotten my position if there wasn't an opening? An opening caused by the humans. Animal Control was crazy on us. At one point it got bad enough that we weren't getting anyone homes anymore, everyone we found was a replacement to someone who was just 'pounded.'"

"How'd you fix that?"

"We added a new branch," explained Lyd. "The Breakers."

"The Breakers?"

"Yeah, they broke into the pound and got our members back, hopefully before they were adopted; the Breakers weren't always quick to jump into action depending on who they were to save."

They both stared at each other for a moment.

"Well, Lyd," Dr. Pete said while staring at his watch. "We're almost out of time for today. Is there anything else you'd like to talk about?"

"Yeah," started Lyd, "Why am I here? Am I crazy?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
End of Chapter 2

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Tue Jun 01, 2010 4:44 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
It's getting really good now :D

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Tue Jun 01, 2010 4:56 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
Keep going. i want 16 more chapters by 2:52 pm tomorrow.

But seriously, i love the story :3

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Tue Jun 01, 2010 4:57 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
it's still kinda short though... hmm... cptr 3 will have something *wink* to make that not a problem

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Tue Jun 01, 2010 4:59 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
DarkHeartsAndSuch wrote:
it's still kinda short though... hmm... cptr 3 will have something *wink* to make that not a problem



Where is it. You've started it. Now follow through >:|

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Sat Jun 05, 2010 5:35 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
Zander wrote:
DarkHeartsAndSuch wrote:
it's still kinda short though... hmm... cptr 3 will have something *wink* to make that not a problem



Where is it. You've started it. Now follow through >:|


i'm scheduling to update it every tuesday. and it's not my fault it's cptr 3 isn't done yet.

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Sat Jun 05, 2010 5:38 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
DarkHeartsAndSuch wrote:
Zander wrote:
DarkHeartsAndSuch wrote:
it's still kinda short though... hmm... cptr 3 will have something *wink* to make that not a problem



Where is it. You've started it. Now follow through >:|


i'm scheduling to update it every tuesday. and it's not my fault it's cptr 3 isn't done yet.


*is impatient*

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Sat Jun 05, 2010 5:39 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
Chapter 3: Insanity Catalyst
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dr. Pete blinked and stared at Lyd. "No, Lyd. You're not crazy. You're here because you're depressed, and you know that."

"Then prove it," Lyd asked of him. "Prove to me that I'm not crazy."

"Well, Lyd, I can't exactly prove that you're not crazy, but I can prove you're not insane."

"Is there a difference?" asked Lyd as Dr. Pete got up and headed out of the room.

"Yes, craziness is often just a temporary case. Insanity is a permanent condition. Now stay here while I go fetch my proof." He left the room. He came back in a few minutes later following a small cat. The cat was yelling at the doctor.

"... This better not be another surprise visit to the vet or-" The cat saw Lyd. "King! What are you doin- Wait, you're not King."

Lyd thought about the kitten's comment for a second. "So you show your dog to all of you're patients?" he said to Dr. Pete.

The kitten looked confused. "Patient?"

"Lyd, Shadow here isn't my patient," the doctor explained. "He's my pet."

"Uh, Hi?"

"Hey," Lyd turned back to Dr. Pete. "How come you didn't have any pictures of him then?"

Shadow turned to his "pictureless" owner.

"We'll talk about it later, Shadow. First you need to talk to Lyd."

"Speaking of which," Lyd interupted, "How is he going to help to prove I'm not insane?"

"Shadow, tell him your story." Shadow turned to Dr. Pete, confused. Dr. Pete continued, "All of it. The truth."

Shadow had a look of pure shock on his face. "A-Are you sure?" Dr. Pete nodded. "Okay, if you say so," his voice trailed off as he turned back to Lyd.

Shadow began to talk. "Well I suppose it all started when my brother had a crazy dream. He went and got an old book from a bookstore he had seen in his dream. Well it was a spell book and we found a spell called Astral Jump. I didn't believe it would work, I mean who would believe that? So I happily volunteered to be the guinea pig, sitting in the center of a diagram he had drawn.
Well it turns out the spell worked, and I was sent to a different universe, this universe. It was all fine and good until my atoms were slowly pulled back to my universe. Pete saved me though, he turned me into a cat and saved my life. In exchange I agreed to be his pet until he could find his associate to help return me home. It was really weird being a pet, I mean I had lived my entire life as a human and i was suddenly a small kitten."

Lyd was listening intentivly, but still very confused. "Wait, you believe that you were a human? That's outrageous!"

"I suppose it would be hard to believe, but in my universe I was a human and pets didn't walk on two legs and they certainly didn't talk. It was a big shock when I found out how different this universe was. It seemed so weird that pets walked and talked and were intelligent." Shadow looked down at his feet.

Lyd looked at Shadow, still quite confused. "So Dr. Pete here is this magical person?"

Dr. Pete looked down at Shadow with a warning look.

Shadow snapped his head up. "What? No no, a different Pete. But uh, anyways I had to live my life as a pet for just about a week. I really thought it was going to be horrible, but it was actually pretty fun. Everything was going fine, under the circumstances, until I had a weird dream where some guy was talking to me in a forest. The next night I found I had sleeped walked to the forest I had seen in my dreams. I didn't know how to get back home so I continued forward into the forest hoping it would lead me to the voice who said he could help me. I eventually ran into a golden circle, which was the entrance to a cave. Inside the cave I found a unicorn, who changed his shape into a human, a hippie that is. With him and Pete's help, not this Pete, they sent me back to my universe. The only problem was that I had to return as my kitten self, and I had to find someone to change me back to a human. I was given a enchanted ring though which I wore to disguise myself as a human. With it I returned back to the bookstore my brother had described and I found the old man who owned it. It turns out he was a magic user as well, and I learned the truth about everything...." Shadow paused.

Lyd took advantage of Shadow's pause. "And this truth is?"

"He told me that I was originally a kitten from the universe I had just left. He saved me from blizzard and took me to the universe where he had found a young couple that wanted another son but couldn't. He had changed me into a human baby and gave me to them, where I lived a normal human life. After he told me that I went home to my human family and told them everything I told you. They didn't beleive me at first, so I took of my ring and they saw my true form. They believed me then, and I had decided to come back to this universe and live the life I had been born to live. With the universal time differences it wouldn't be hard to visit my human family anyway."

Lyd thought for a second. "Universal Time differences? As in time moves faster in one than the other, right? So that leaves me with just one question, how old are you?"

Shadow had to think for a moment, he knew how old he was as a human, but not his cat self. "Well, I was just about 15 years old as a human... I'm not sure how old I am as a kitten. Maybe like a year old?"

"That sounds about right," interjected Dr. Pete.

"Ok then, if this is all true and the 'other' universe moves slower, say, one week there is one month here, that would make you older than me."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
End of Chapter 3

Well obviously this chapter was highly based off of Neko's story, in fact, he wrote most of Shadow's speaking parts for me, so I thank him for taking his time to do that, and I suggest you to do he same. And for those few who haven't read Neko's story, you're missing out.

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Sun Jun 06, 2010 11:09 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
I had a lot of fun writing Shadow's parts :)

*Can't wait to see wait will happen next*

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Sun Jun 06, 2010 11:11 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
I cAnt wait for the next one either 0_o

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Sun Jun 06, 2010 11:23 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
Oh neat a Crossover! I love crossovers. Will that be the only time or will it happen again?

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Mon Jun 07, 2010 12:16 am
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Post Re: Four Hearts
I don't know... I originally had it planned for at least 7 chapters, but then I got the idea to put shadow in it, and now I only have up to 4 planned, and even there I'm at a loss. Though there is two ways I can have it go... One staying as a therapy session, or making it even more of a fanfic of housepets... If that happens then yes, there will be more crossovers.

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Mon Jun 07, 2010 12:20 am
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Post Re: Four Hearts
Ohhh I got me another good one to read ^___^

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Post Re: Four Hearts
I like where this story is going ^^

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Mon Jun 07, 2010 7:28 am
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Post Re: Four Hearts
Sorry to all who were expecting an update on monday or tuesday or around there somewhere, it will be delayed untill next Friday or something, because i have too much homework and stuff for the weekend, mainly just writing a research paper, so i haven't been able to write story words.

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Thu Jun 10, 2010 7:57 pm
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Post Re: Four Hearts
DarkHeartsAndSuch wrote:
Sorry to all who were expecting an update on monday or tuesday or around there somewhere, it will be delayed untill next Friday or something, because i have too much homework and stuff for the weekend, mainly just writing a research paper, so i haven't been able to write story words.


Darn! Oh well school/real life should always take precedence over fan fiction (cause when it doesn't you know you have a problem)

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Post Re: Four Hearts
IceKitsune wrote:
DarkHeartsAndSuch wrote:
Sorry to all who were expecting an update on monday or tuesday or around there somewhere, it will be delayed untill next Friday or something, because i have too much homework and stuff for the weekend, mainly just writing a research paper, so i haven't been able to write story words.


Darn! Oh well school/real life should always take precedence over fan fiction (cause when it doesn't you know you have a problem)


Monday is literally my last day of school, so after that, i might be updating about twice a week depending on how much i feel like writing

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Post Re: Four Hearts
I'm really liking this so far and I can't wait for the next update :P
But remember what IceKitsune said:
Quote:
school/real life should always take precedence over fan fiction (cause when it doesn't you know you have a problem)

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